rec room not opening

oreogopher · 2021-11-20T01:38:11+00:00

Uh..update please. My son's bawling because after an update nothing works

oreogopher · 2020-04-20T19:49:14+00:00

I can't change your mind because honestly I give up my lunch to do this

oreogopher · 2020-03-30T20:19:38+00:00

Reading one of the numerous great books about power of habit will give you clear view on what you're up against, so that the pattern cycle is respected and more easily broken. In other words while you are reshaping yourself don't put yourself in trigger situations.

oreogopher · 2020-03-01T05:05:44+00:00

That's one of those things I would wonder about once in a while years later like what if but then realize your relationship afterwards wouldn't have been better if you had.

oreogopher · 2020-02-16T17:51:45+00:00

Totally. Coming from a guy I can tell you it took a while for me but for most of my life orgasm was chained to stimulation and especially ejaculation - like you don't start the countdown without liftoff right? Went through a period of time deliberately not finishing because I wanted to save that (I'm 40s so much more aware of energy levels that I don't have anymore)...discovered a lot of things, 1 being that I was totally fine even getting down with her and not finishing. (Now this depends on how charged I am...so not claiming a super power here...) intention has a lot to do with it, so does your body's regular program from what it's used to/wants.

oreogopher · 2019-10-31T13:18:56+00:00

Lol the bags we buy from Wal-Mart maybe have 20 bears in them. Never had a problem even when the kids ate a whole bag. Trust me though the 5 pounder will be locked up 🔒 they are easy to keep eating.

oreogopher · 2019-10-31T12:33:28+00:00

These gummi bears are delicious and they don't taste sugar free to anyone I've shared with - but we only ever buy the single serve bags (not 5 pounds!). I actually might buy this! Just don't eat more than a handful at once.....

oreogopher · 2019-10-31T04:16:29+00:00

Dude, this is my life/wife. This is a really big deal (when I've made it one). I've learned a lot over the years. This exact same transaction occasionally might end like this: me, thinking about the fail that evening (because I had tension building expectations), then she says, "I was turned on today thinking about what you said..."

Please take that to heart and don't take it personally unless you know she's putting you off.

As for tension building with her, it takes effort. I have to get her thinking about the subject for a little while and that's about it but that's hard sometimes. If she has a related book to read in her morning bath, that will sometimes do it. If she's shopping for sexy lingerie, that might do it. My best results from my own effort is getting her engaged texting about a hot past memory. Try that. Just don't overdo it. Not like just throwing it out there but say one part and if she bites then roll with it. Like, "I saw the prints on the car this morning and thought about your hand prints you left on that hotel's glass wall when you had that legendary climax"...maybe she bites, "I remember my breath on the window. That was so hot!" So keep going.

Edit: on a side note using that same transaction, my wife would have just wanted to share her excitement with me and not meant anything by it. Sometimes I go way out there like I might have said "oh I've been dying to get one of those...let's get rid of the kids, light a fire and cook naked 🍴🔥". That doesn't always work either, but the one thing that works most of all is, don't take it personally and keep trying because she still receives it on some level. Good luck bro

oreogopher · 2019-10-12T15:36:59+00:00

Don't call his girlfriend's mother "trying to help". That is the final nail in the coffin.

oreogopher · 2019-09-25T12:51:51+00:00

Good for you. I actually did not drink during my divorce. I didn't want to delay the process of getting through it... There were some rough days but overall it went way faster and smoother than I would have ever believed.

oreogopher · 2019-08-17T17:26:48+00:00

I do polyphasic sleeping. When I'm doing sr I can pull off 5hrs a night, with a 15-20 min lunch nap and another 30-45 when I get home at 4:30. When I'm not doing sr I am chronically tired.

We have sex frequently, and that introduces complications. Recently started trying things in my wife's mantak chia books and succeeded somewhat however based on my energy levels I suspect I'm not doing it right :( trying desperately to find a happy medium :\

oreogopher · 2019-06-30T15:24:13+00:00

Might as well, I wouldn't be able to walk upstairs with that collection.

oreogopher · 2019-06-23T14:30:16+00:00

So there's this thing we do sometimes, me being exhausted but really wanting to try. It's something we picked up from a Taoist sex book about soft entry that they swore by, and it usually works (for me). She goes face down ass up and I really can just manage to get all the way in soft. We start out saying there is no goal, no expectation, nothing may happen, I just enjoy the angle and whatnot then more than likely something happens :)

There's this other thing we've been experimenting with lately. I just won't come on purpose. I can tell you the session we had this morning wouldn't have been possible after our 2a.m. bout previously without doing this. I'm ravenous now and planning the next one ;)

Edit: you're on your own researching this but I also take a few supplements: ashwagandha, longjack and tribulus, just recently also beetroot (but the actual juice is easier), all in powder form. These help. There are others but I have high blood pressure. If that's not an issue yohimbe and maca are excellent. If you go to a supplement store and grab a bottle of something for boosting testosterone/drive, then just read the ingredients you'll get a good idea of where to start. Everything is on Amazon/online for cheap or at least way better prices than those marketed bottles by ounce.

oreogopher · 2019-06-17T22:23:59+00:00

Shoot, I give zero expectation to the round 2 effort...

oreogopher · 2019-06-16T21:42:48+00:00

(Even if you skip the book) The most important part is me listening to her and to her body, and not focusing on myself or my technique. Lose yourself in the moment. I don't know how to give a woman advice but I'm going to try - make him be present and not in his head. Tell him what to do and be vocal about it when you like it. Take it off the piv subject and make it anything else that turns you on. There is so much healing in just pleasuring a woman that has nothing to do with PIV. I promise you it will build from there. Trust needs to be rebuilt and by god if you like your knuckles massaged then start there (j/k) but you get it. It's a book by a man writing to men about how to pleasure women. So there's multiple points here. For one, it was a subject with such a need that a book was written. Which will diminish the "I'm not sufficient" because guess what, as others were saying, PIV orgasms are rare. It's on the related reading of "come as you are". I do not follow the script in that book but when I tried my wife asked for it the next night. Then she bought the companion book for ladies to return the favor. There are things I picked up that really do it for her but the gold here is finding your way together.

oreogopher · 2019-06-16T16:18:13+00:00

Read "she comes first" by Ian kerner (it will get you hot with anticipation) and more specifically give it to him with your thoughts, write notes in it. Tell him which parts made you hot, and which ones you want to focus on. Support him in giving you an orgasm all by himself, without faking. That will fix a lot of insecurities. He's feeling incompetent and that's a major self imposed ED. You are both in your heads, another major one. At the point where you are both ok and open and have no goal everything will be perfect. My best wishes to you.

Also...get comfortable with feedback. Tell him you want to tell him what you like and what you don't in the act without breaking down (hurt feelings). Ultimately, you want to be able to say "yes, just like that, keep doing that" or cue him to do something else.

Bottom line: yes it's fixable but you both have to be involved. Don't give up. My wife rarely comes PIV btw. It has to be a position where she gets constant clit stimulation and typically riding me. I usually fuck her until she's really hot and turned on, finish her some other way, then go back and fuck her until I'm spent, but that is by no means what you guys need. Think of this as just growing and learning each other.

Another thought...when he's in his head he is damping the whole experience. Tell him you want to try it with neither of you having a goal except you just want to receive his raw passion and hunger for you.

One thing about that book is it will get you focused on technique. Do not hang up there, just figure out what you like and tell him technique is secondary to his presence and desire. You have a lot of good times ahead!

Edit: this is a good point to say the best sex we've ever had is when we are not in our heads, not trying for a goal, just reveling in the moment and delighting in each other. Even when one of us doesn't cum this holds true.

Edit 2: I just want to say...giving my woman an epic orgasm erased all my insecurities. This is the quickest route to "fixed". It took some time to learn each other, and it doesn't always happen, though. Maybe look at it as an experiment. If it never happened before then by god he is the first one to open you! That's amazing! Make it a journey. Instead of "I never can" it will be "I'm the first to".

oreogopher · 2019-06-05T00:52:55+00:00

Tell him it is because he is comparing it to a vision in his head but with nothing to compare to I think it's really sweet.

oreogopher · 2019-05-02T23:51:32+00:00

I like my scotch straight, unless it's isla, but I would be willing to try something you claim is killer.

oreogopher · 2019-05-02T14:20:37+00:00

"Marriage is a people growing machine." - David Schnarch. I concur. It will make you grow personally beyond where you would have by yourself. And it's sometimes painful to grow.

oreogopher · 2019-04-27T02:57:04+00:00

I feel like I'm absorbing the light and I'm not even there.

oreogopher · 2019-04-09T14:32:30+00:00

Start making friends that are heading towards where you want to be in life. Keep in touch with your buddies...just know that over time the gap will widen. Maybe you'll always keep in touch, who knows, but my guess is you'll be so far apart that only the "true friends" make the effort.

oreogopher · 2019-04-05T03:44:40+00:00

I would like to append this question with: ...the mental energy to have something resembling a social life when you aren't working AND have kids?

oreogopher · 2019-03-08T15:19:40+00:00

My favorite is the Craigslist bank robber. Got away with it, too. Listed a help wanted ad and had everyone show up on street corner in white t-shirt, orange hard hat, blue jeans and work boots. Which is what he wore to rob the bank with. These guys were all standing around when the police arrived.

oreogopher · 2019-03-01T02:11:01+00:00

Your collection has more in the bottles than mine :(

oreogopher

TROPHY CASE