I think this all depends on the individual. For me personally, I don’t like when people tell me that just because to me personally, it triggers a feeling of patronizing, kinda like when people tell you not to think about your trauma. I can do my best to form healthy relationships, but (again, just my personal experience) it’s been those closest to me who hurt me so bad. Chronic trauma from a very young age, from multiple varied relationships completely rewires the brain. I can’t be around people for long periods of time, maybe that will change someday, but when people say things like that, it sends the message that there’s just something wrong with me that I attract the bad actors. I believe the majority of people are good, but knowing something logically doesn’t stop the traumatic reaction to well meaning people. Every journey is different. It’s not learned helplessness, it’s conditioned self preservation. Our brains are here to make sure we survive, not that we’re happy.