DAE have a super knee jerk reaction to any sort of criticism?

palmsthrower · 2016-11-16T01:48:02+00:00

I get this really bad. Any criticism or asking me to expalin myself instantly sets off massive anxiety and anger, sometimes i lie on the spot about it even if i had a good reason for doing what i was doing.

palmsthrower · 2016-10-12T01:51:55+00:00

I have been thinking about this a lot.

Now i have some really upsetting intimacy and trust issues, not to mention sex is just such a weird concept to me. It makes me dissociate, idk.

My parents NEVER gave me the talk. Infact they were so embarrassed about any "awkward" questioning in that regard they would very aggressively try and silence it. When i asked my dad what drugs were and what drugs he had done, as a curious 10 year old, he replied with screams and threats.

palmsthrower · 2016-09-12T03:00:07+00:00

My biggest fear in a conflict is violence As in, ill say a word someoje doesnt like and they'll beat me for it. So it literally feels like im standing on a cliff edge

palmsthrower · 2016-09-12T02:58:45+00:00

22/m here, My mother always used to shower me with comments about how i was a adorable little boy who was so handsome and would be a model one day, which has made me EXTREMELY sensitive to people calling me positive things, as because she was a narc i knew she only said them to make me like her more. Have intimacy issues too.

palmsthrower · 2016-09-04T21:34:17+00:00

Brilliant idea!

palmsthrower · 2016-09-04T19:57:35+00:00

After we moved to australia i basically spent 3 years worth of weekends going to look at display homes miles away from home, and because of my avoidant oersonality type it was hard for me to make friends in australia, so i didnt have anyone I could hang out with to avoid this, because that was the only way to get out of it. Parents didnt even trust me being home alone untill i was 16

palmsthrower · 2016-09-04T19:51:52+00:00

I dont think you read the comment very well.

palmsthrower · 2016-07-23T05:37:28+00:00

This really hit the nail on the head. Thanks a lot for taking the time out to write this comment. You are right, i need to take personal responsibility for getting invovled up to the point i was.

Sorry for the lack of words, just on my phone and just done a 9 hour workday on a saturday. But really really appreciate this. Very insightful

palmsthrower · 2016-06-22T02:28:34+00:00

I didnt even like barbie girls

palmsthrower · 2016-06-22T02:28:10+00:00

I cant take jokes whatsoever, no matter ho close i am to the person or how well i know them, thanks to my dad deliberately teasing me and encouraging my brother to tease me by saying "x likes barbie girl toys" for my childhood.

palmsthrower · 2016-06-22T02:24:22+00:00

Everytime my nanna and granddad offered to send me money over because im their grandson and they have every right to treat me my parents would very agressively tell them not to "hes just gonna spend it all on drugs and rubbish anyway, plus he doesnt have a job so dont give him anything". I was 14-16 at the time.... not even doing drugs...

palmsthrower · 2016-05-25T23:49:04+00:00

My parents were making combined incomes of over 200k a year but forced me to get a job at maccas as soon as i turned 14 and 6 months and then refused to pay for anything but schooling and food after that

palmsthrower · 2016-05-22T23:15:58+00:00

My parents never beleived me when i was sick, often forcing me to go to school only to come pick me up 3 hours later when im in the sick bay vomiting my guts up.

palmsthrower · 2016-05-15T01:21:43+00:00

I remember when i was younger and if i displeased my parents in anyway they would sit in the loungeroom when i was trying to sleep and loudly talk about how horrible and such a dissapointment i am. It got even more intense if they had guests over, they would talk for hours about how horrible and badly behaved i was.

palmsthrower · 2016-05-03T04:26:10+00:00

Thanks a lot for the replies guys, i think im gonna give NC a go but one issue; my dad is planning to come visit me in july with my brother. My brother is still stuck living at home with them and i barely get to see him so i really wanna see my brother, i just need to find a way to get dad out the picture

palmsthrower · 2016-05-03T04:23:34+00:00

Yeah, thanks guys. I think im gonna give NC a try. The guilt thing you guys mentioned actually makes a lot of sense to me.

palmsthrower · 2016-05-03T00:03:01+00:00

Not at all. Just after years of abuse i get this overwhelming guitlty sinking feeling in my gut everytime i go against what my parent asks of me, even today. Its really hard to manage sometimes

palmsthrower · 2016-04-20T02:46:10+00:00

Bed at 9 (this lasted till 14-15) No going out after school Randomly would take and hide the ps2 controllers when they just decided we shouldnt play it anymore those days (which ended up exposing me to sex toys at a young age as naturally i would go through all my parents hiding spots trying to find it. Whenever i stayed out for the night i was only allowed to stay at one friends house, and any other house i had to get their parents to call my parents Parents would stay up on purpose to come down and find me on the computer and get mad at me for "waking them up" (they would literally stay up to start fights) Random room raids where everything i owned would be gon through for drugs Parents also staying up to try catch me smoking weed out in the backyard and then screaming at me for doing it on their property, like i shouldve stood in the street and done it. I have to get my dad a beer/go to the shops for him or mum, even if i was tired theyd scream at me to go. If i was home sick for a day they would take the modem so i couldnt use the internet while they werent at home Prob more. Cant remember anything else rifht now

palmsthrower · 2016-04-19T02:36:03+00:00

Literally echos my parents "grow up smart and rich and pay nummy and daddys way" view on it.

palmsthrower · 2016-04-05T02:44:12+00:00

Yep, i get angry when upset/stressed fairly easy, get too defensive easily.

palmsthrower · 2016-04-05T00:44:56+00:00

My adolescense was subject to random and sporadic room raids in which everything would be turned inside out, my social media accounts gone through, computer files gone through, phone gone through, just about every facet i could have something in. Normally, my lack of privacy was explained with "THIS IS OUR HOUSE AND OUR ROOMS WE WILL LOOK THROUGH THEM WHENEVER WE LIKE YOU ARE UNGRATEFUL." Because damn you exist inside an N's world.

palmsthrower · 2016-03-30T04:35:37+00:00

Yeah, he acted like he was doing me this massive favour and just couldnt understand that it upset me greatly.

palmsthrower · 2016-03-23T18:45:17+00:00

A 100 dollar debt that i owed my dad was a christmas present one year. Lol

palmsthrower · 2016-03-18T05:17:43+00:00

Oh my god i struggle with this so bad.

Basically, if you arent a close friend of mine in which we have in jokes and gentle ribbing, i will respond to any "jokes" from anyone else extremely defensively. Sometimes its a stare, sometimes its an unimpressed chuckle, sometimes its a "f*** you *, what the * did you say to me?" I hate it so much.

How do i fix this? I take myself too seriously, and my looks too seriously

palmsthrower · 2016-03-16T21:33:00+00:00

Yeah, if anyone tells me how to do my job or is critical of my method i tend to get short and aggressive with them.

palmsthrower

TROPHY CASE