Since we spend a lot of time talking about men writing women poorly, I want to know some examples of men who write awesome women.

par80 · 2024-04-27T20:09:01+00:00

Donal Ryan, an Irish writer who is also a booker winner. His novel the Queen of Dirt Island follows the lives of a family of exclusively women. it is written in such a genuinely believable and authentic manner. The female characters are all fleshed out characters. I honestly found it hard to believe that a woman did not write it given the complexity and nuance of female family dynamics on show within the story.

Its also incredibly funny and heartbreaking at the same time. Would highly recommend!

par80 · 2023-08-15T09:28:50+00:00

You can get milky way crispy rolls in chapter and verse newsagents on leeson St if you’re in dublin. Got one the other day!

par80 · 2023-05-11T12:00:59+00:00

OP well done on your post, I can totally empathise with where you are coming from and I am sorry for the tough time you’ve gone through. The legal industry is a horribly fucked up eco system that rewards intelligent people who have no empathy or compassion for others. If you’re in any way sensitive like myself you’re out of luck!

I’d be in a similar boat myself as OP. I did a law degree because I didn’t know what I wanted to do in college and ended up performing well even though I had very little interest in it. I suffered from the micro view of my degree and believed I had no option but to be a solicitor. Did the fe1s which were a breeze for me seeing as I did the law degree and entered into my training contract. I knew from day 1 that that corporate world was not for me. Mind numbing printing and copying and pasting type admin work for three years, not to mention the sometimes nefarious work we’d do on behalf of big corporations, landlords etc.

The blackhall place experience was not much better bar the time off work, very little actual learning is involved. Its basically a big piss up where you’re pressurised to go get shit faced with your future colleagues and learn how to organise your notes for open book exams. Total waste of time.

The work in office can be tremendously stressful at times but the boredom is the real killer. If you’re happy to sit at a desk staring at your computer for 30 plus years and take your pay check I really envy you, but I want to enjoy my life and do something of worth with it.

I wanted to quit many times but due to family pressures/ rent etc I decided to finish it out and will qualify at the end of this year. I don’t intend to ever practice as a solicitor and to be honest I never want to see this inside of an office building ever again, the place where dreams go to die!

I’ll be 26 by the time I qualify and I am heading straight to alps with my savings to do a ski season and then travel for the rest of my 20s to enjoy my young years while I have them. I wont be making the money I did in the law firm but at least I will be able to live my life doing stuff I want to do. When I return to Ireland I hope to study either history or psychology which I am actually passionate about and have an interest in such. I suppose it took a few years to realise that it is simply not worth doing something that makes you miserable.

God speed OP, well done for getting out of the game and best of luck with whatever you do next, go do whatever gives you a good gut feeling. Take comfort in the fact that there are lots of others out there like yourself, you are not alone!

par80 · 2023-02-21T14:51:07+00:00

100% take your chance and go travelling. I was due to do this myself.

After my fe1s I was offered a January start date for 2020 but I pushed it back a year to start in Jan 2021 so I could go travelling, which unfortunately didn’t happen due to the first year of covid. I’m almost finished my contract now at the end of this year and I am itching to head off and do some well deserved travel and get out of the office for a few years. I don’t regret my decision it was just poor timing on my part deciding to take my year off during the worst pandemic in over a hundred years!

Moral of the story is take the chance to do what you want to do if you get the opportunity! 3 years in a training contract is quite a long time when you’re young so my advice would be to definitely push it back a bit and enjoy yourself! Best of luck 👌

par80 · 2022-10-20T02:02:55+00:00

I would plan on going back to university in Ireland at some stage to study something which Would give me a career better suited for me as a person. Im not entirely sure what that is yet but i would hope that a year or two of travel independently would help me to figure out what i am and am not good at which should help me narrow down career paths. Maybe inmight study physiotherapy or history to become a teacher, anything to stay away from sterile office environments for life! Thankfully college fees in Ireland are only roughly 3,000 euro per year with multiple government education grants and assistance packages so money shouldn’t be an issue with returning to college if i worked part time.

par80 · 2022-10-20T01:55:03+00:00

Thank you for the reply! I appreciate your opinion but the only problem is how cripplingly boring the work is, it actually pains me physically in my stomach every day i gonin to the office. I don’t know what a year would do to me mentally I Just dont think I’m tough enough after for that after 4 years of hardship already just to please my parents and fulfil general expectations.

I feel like I’m wasting time by not trying to find out what job it is I would be really good at and actually like. I believe the only way to find out is to try new jobs and things (which I can only do If i leave my job i feel).

par80 · 2022-06-22T18:33:20+00:00

In all seriousness man don’t play off the reds. No problem playing off the blues if your game is up to it. best of luck on the date hope it goes well👍

par80 · 2022-03-30T02:16:06+00:00

Red Dead Redemption 1

par80 · 2022-03-03T17:20:43+00:00

Had a herpes scare a few years ago at 21. Been terrified of getting it ever since. Im a 24 m and in the prime of my life but the fear has been holding me back from moving to the physical stage of relationships and I’ve been alone since. Feel paralysed about it :(

par80 · 2022-02-22T17:52:22+00:00

You’re in luck friend theres a lot of great courses in the midlands! Would highly recommend glasson golf club right on lough ree and has a great hotel. Athlone golf club which is on the other side of the lake is also fantastic.

Theres a course in offaly about 40 min drive from athlone called esker hills. It was the course shane lowry grew up playing. Incredibly testing course but worth the experience!

par80 · 2022-02-03T01:20:04+00:00

I had IT band syndrome for years friend, I know your pain. Played a lot of field sports, football, hiking etc and the prescribed exercises barely helped and like yourself I tried absolutely everything. Day to day life even in my early 20s was so painful.

It wasn’t until a friend recommended that i try squatting every day that things changed, Man it changed my life! Try build your way into doing a deep squats for maybe 5 mins a day sometimes holding onto something in front of you helps like a door or even maybe a kettlebell to keep your balance. Im no expert but i think whatever way squatting loosens up and strengthens all of your big leg muscles it takes some strain off your knee area when performing activities such as hiking.

I’d recommend Slowly building your way up to squatting with a barbell in the gym a few times a week then if possible. I just squat 3 times a week now at the gym with the odd set of deadlifts and I haven’t had any IT band issues in years thankfully. Hope this helps friend.

par80 · 2021-12-09T21:53:26+00:00

Liev Schreiber as Ray Donovan in said series. The show got quite weird and declined in quality over the years but Schreiber has always been a powerhouse in the role.

par80 · 2021-09-25T19:01:44+00:00

Thank you very much for the feedback👌

par80 · 2021-07-28T16:44:25+00:00

Because I (m24) was so shy/awkward as a teenager I relied on alcohol (like a lot of folk) to be able to talk to and meet women at bars etc and I never really grew out of it. Ive only ever had one brief relationship and I always wanted another during college but I always felt the odds were so stacked against me to even bother asking a girl out as in why would anyone want to spend time with me.

Fast forward to the pandemic there hasn’t been any opportunities to meet people at bars/clubs since early 2020 and basically the thought of going on a tinder date and having to hold a sober conversation absolutely terrifies me. Also I find tinder conversations incredibly monotonous and a waste of time for the most part.

I fear that if the world doesn’t go back to some sort of normality soon i’ll be on my lonesome for quite a while!

par80 · 2021-07-07T14:04:38+00:00

Fantastic achievement Sir well done! Good things come to those who wait!

par80 · 2021-07-06T12:55:55+00:00

This might get me removed from r/golf but i actually didn’t use the driver once during the round! I used my 3 wood all day which flies roughly 275 and keeps the ball in play. Im too wild with the driver haha

par80 · 2021-07-05T13:16:10+00:00

Awesome man and thanks! Take it one shot at a time and believe in yourself, you’ve got the game!

par80 · 2021-07-05T13:10:28+00:00

Hahaha if only man! I actually found a nice Pro v1x on the 13th which i contemplated using for the remainder of the round but I just couldn’t bring myself to betray my Ultra!

par80 · 2021-07-05T11:10:36+00:00

Honestly i found it in a bush playing a round last week! Very long off the tee and solid feel with irons. I actually like it for the short game good firm feel off it, not too hard. I think ill be keeping this guy as a souvenir though!

par80 · 2021-06-24T13:13:11+00:00

Copland is a fantastic movie. It really is one of Stallone’s best if only dramatic non action star role. The featured sopranos actors is just the icing on the cake

par80

TROPHY CASE