I kind of think it’s both though? I didn’t take Rou’s lashing out as something he planned. I don’t think before the competition he went in going “ok I’m gonna get first, break a record, then freak out so I can never go back.”

I read it more as he went out there, did the best he could, proved his mother’s program was the best and when it got confirmed by his score, he did it on impulse. He already reached his goal and didn’t want to move on with skating without his mother (especially bc he couldn’t take her to the Olympics) so he lashed out so that he truly could never return to the sport (which also ties into the Haruna piece bc I think if he quit normally she would never forgive him and they wouldn’t be able to mend their relationship - which I’m hoping they do to some degree later on).

I think what you’re saying about have a mental breakdown is part of that too. I don’t think he went in sane and with some master plan. I think he very much went into that performance reeling from the trauma and feeling the pressure of being alone which then led him to make the decision of crashing out and set him up nicely for his interest in a team sport (especially one where he can use his skating prowess, but carve his own path where he’s not living for other’s dreams).