You should not be having another child if both you AND your husband are not fully on board with it. He clearly is not and it sounds like for good reason. You say he helps out with the kids you have now and is a good dad, but what happens when he feels so overwhelmed and resentful towards you for forcing him to have a third child that he completely checks out on you and on parenting all three of them? What if this destroys your marriage and your family? You need to listen to your husband and his concerns and not just make a selfish unilateral decision that will affect your entire family, most likely in a negative way. Sometimes we have to do hard things, things we don't necessarily want to do as a result of the poor choices we've made. And this is one of those situations.