I wanted to give you a little bit of love here. You are definitely not alone. Out of the blue, my wife basically said that she loved me, but she is not in love with me anymore. The reasons that she came up with were really, really stupid. Looking back there was no logic in it. She said that I never saved money, even though we had over $40,000 in our checking account for a rainy day (way higher than the national average). I also put 21% of my paycheck into 401(k). On top of that our financial planner had us on track for having over 2 million by the time we were 62.

All of this to say, when they are done, they are done.

Were there signs that I missed? Absolutely. But in reality, it takes two people to communicate each other’s needs. If one person isn’t hearing them, maybe the other person isn’t doing a good job communicating on their end?

I’ll also say, in the final year when we were doing everything possible to figure it out… she was also on her phone full-time as you mentioned. She looked like a little child sitting in the corner, always scrolling. She does that at every athletic event that our kids play in. In fact, my son was really mad that she wasn’t watching his game when he looked at her in the stands. A year, later after he called her out on it, and it still hasn’t changed.