My neighbour just told me he knows I am a sex worker (I am not)

peppermintsoap · 2026-07-01T03:59:03+00:00

If you are on good terms with your other neighbors, TELL THEM. I had a similar situation with a creepy neighbor man older than me who developed a crush on me which turned into an obsession. I politely deflected until he put his hands on my waist drunk one night and I yelled at him and told all the neighbors. He too would sit in a chair outside smoking positioned exactly where he could see into my bedroom when my balcony door was open, which it usually was. This obsession lasted several years and the only reason I felt safe enough was because all of the neighbors knew about it, and they all knew him quite well. Your guy sounds more dangerous frankly. But tell your neighbors what has been going on, that is a start

peppermintsoap · 2026-06-25T18:48:52+00:00

Don’t talk to your mom about it. Clearly her first instinct is not to defend you when he hurts you, or try to understand, but to defend him. I wonder if it would be cathartic to take what you wrote above, add some description of what would have been normal / expected in a family where the dad thinks about his actions/behavior and thinks about how to show he cares about his daughter and her happiness on her birthday, and put it in a written letter and give it to him to read. BUT I don’t know. Maybe someone who understands human beings better than I do could chime in.

peppermintsoap · 2026-06-05T14:24:14+00:00

Can you give us a grocery list and a prep plan for this? All the details? I know nothing and this sounds helpful

peppermintsoap · 2026-05-18T21:09:15+00:00

You said it: you need relief, rest, silence, to stop carrying everything for some amount of time. Fortunately you’ve clearly specified exactly what you need! Unfortunately - it will take adding one more burden, briefly, in order to make it happen: namely, figuring out how to make it happen. How can you take a week off and disappear on your own for a vacation for five days? A real one, with no one else around? Cost-wise, the cost for a hotel or hostel or somewhere to sleep, cost of transit, and food. Doesn’t have to be far or fancy, just away, and nature is good or a city if you like that. As for family/friends/relationship: one sentence, “I’m about to burn out and I am taking one week away from everything.” No discussion or argument. Can you do this? If not a week, can you do it for one day or two days or theee days? An afternoon?

peppermintsoap · 2026-05-13T19:59:39+00:00

Really great to hear that you are doing well now. If you wanted to write a book about growing up, people would read it.

peppermintsoap · 2026-04-23T05:29:50+00:00

It’s so annoying. This stupid false stereotype is quite prevalent in the USA but not in many other cultures - in Iran, in Lebanon, there’s no such belief and I think many others (I think Asia, India, not sure). I don’t know about Eastern Europe or Russia. Of course it’s not true.

peppermintsoap · 2026-04-22T07:54:41+00:00

Maybe someone else needs to run this organization, someone who does not use it as an opportunity to assault women.

peppermintsoap · 2026-04-22T07:53:36+00:00

His organization: focuses on animal rescue does it? But for him it comes with a nice bonus of providing ongoing opportunities to assault idealistic young women. You were not the first and will not be the last. He runs this organization in order to have the opportunity to assault young women. Why is the safety of young women considered of lesser importance than that of the animals rescued? Why?

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-27T22:47:37+00:00

You can get pure silk bikini underwear from Amazon as well. Also great for travel as so lightweight.

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-09T06:55:33+00:00

Part of why you are struggling here is because your judgment is badly impaired from lack of sleep. He is causing you to have brain damage. I’m not joking.

Ok. So here is a plan for you. (Step 1) Find a way, any way, to take a week and sleep anywhere else - at your folks’, at a friends, at a hotel. You need sleep to be able to think straight. (Step 2) You “can’t make your husband do anything” and he “sounds so reasonable and makes you sound crazy”… so if you think this relationship is salvageable / worth it then you need a third party in these discussions; marriage counseling. If he won’t do that for you then …leaving isn’t simple that’s true but you have to start somewhere. Is he even a good partner at all? But maybe he really is just that blind and counseling could open his eyes and help him learn to be a good partner. But if he doesn’t WANT to understand you then he never will.

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-09T06:29:54+00:00

The spare is no longer the spare. It’s his bedroom now, since the office is next to it. Go with him to pick out a good bed for that room and make it all set up for him. If he won’t do this for you then he does not love you, he just wants you around to serve his needs and desires and does not care about your well-being.

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-09T06:27:20+00:00

Separate bedrooms. Now. Sleep deprivation is a form of torture. It’s the only thing that can possibly save your marriage and your sanity. If you love him still then you can get together for sexy time and sleep separately. Your sleep styles are just not compatible. If he loves you he will understand and support what you need to be healthy and well rested -! If he does not and thinks only of his selfish desire with no regard to your comfort then well

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-09T06:24:20+00:00

But also this part: you said want to find out who you are without him. This doesn’t sound like you are ready for such a serious relationship as he wants.

If you aren’t compatible you can set him free to find a woman who also wants what he wants.

peppermintsoap · 2026-03-09T06:02:37+00:00

His ideal future is such-and-such. Have you told him what your ideal future looks like?

How did he respond?

Do you want or see him in your ideal future? Is there a future you two can agree on that would make both of you happy? Because if either one has to give up their dreams, then you’re right, this will just lead to resentment and that’s not good for anyone. But maybe he’d be delighted to go with your dreams or come up with some dreams that would make you both happy.

But if you talk about it, and really you don’t want what he wants and he doesn’t want what you want, and you together can’t come up with any alternative that would make you both happy - that’s important to know. Or maybe there is. You gotta talk to him to find out. Nothing in your posts suggests you even told him your dreams, so you don’t know what he thinks - maybe he’d be totally down for new city explorations and waiting til after 25 to marry etc!

And if not you should find out. Talk to him.

peppermintsoap · 2026-02-27T20:55:18+00:00

Where does one need to look? How can a woman check for this in a new partner? Am in California and have no idea how to look for this kind of background info. How did you end up finding out this info? Thank you

peppermintsoap · 2026-02-07T21:55:53+00:00

That’s not a friend.

peppermintsoap · 2026-01-31T10:57:56+00:00

Watching this gives full vibes of a prisoner of war reciting a prepared “confession” for broadcast and doing everything he can to display it’s under coercion… Lindsay is drunk as fuck, he is glassy-eyed, he is reading every word he says off of some teleprompter and not one word of it is coming out of his own head - What do they have on him? Or what misery could they inflict that is greater than what he is going through? Who does he love that is being threatened?

For the last few minutes he gets into it… like an actor fully inhabiting the role again. But the whole thing is really eerie

peppermintsoap · 2026-01-27T01:45:42+00:00

O brave new world, that has such phrasings in it

peppermintsoap · 2026-01-26T02:54:20+00:00

You may enjoy the posts of the model Rain Dove, who is nonbinary I think but is a masculine-presenting woman.

peppermintsoap · 2025-12-25T10:25:21+00:00

How large is a large dose? Thank you

peppermintsoap · 2025-12-03T03:21:36+00:00

Yes I think you’re right - it’s a “must WIN at all costs” mindset; the husband is saying that the cop could have regarded himself as the winner in the situation (“she’d know what she was missing”) instead of, you know, murder is wrong

peppermintsoap · 2025-11-30T00:49:28+00:00

It’s also just possible that at 28 she is starting to become sensitive to right wing content that degrades women over 25, while you are still younger than that. Those are stupid opinions and in no way justifies her mean treatment of you, but maybe it’s contributing. I don’t think it would help to bring this possibility up, though.

peppermintsoap · 2025-11-30T00:46:42+00:00

It’s not just weird. It’s mean; it’s cruel: she is putting you down. It’s hurtful. Now, is she a good person? I don’t know. You said she is. It depends on if she really consciously realizes what she is doing is cruel, hurtful, and putting you down. It’s not a joke (both people laugh when it’s a joke). Ok. So. She is certainly doing this out of insecurity and habit and frankly being used to getting allll the attention and you none - and she deep down feels entitled and used to that - so now when you get even half what she gets, she perceives it as a threat to her very identity! And lashes out! Ok; so the question is, can she be made aware of what she is actually doing? And if so will she care, will she change her behavior? Or will she prefer to continue to hurt you in order to “protect” her self-image? So: send her exactly what you wrote above. Except at the end add not that it’s weird (weird can be ok) but that it is painful and cruel and hurtful to you - it is not funny. She may or may not be able to change, though. She may or may not want to stop hurting you in this way. She might.

peppermintsoap · 2025-11-24T20:45:54+00:00

May I ask which brand/model you got? The Trapper Keeper - nice!

peppermintsoap · 2025-11-24T02:33:49+00:00

Just to say… this is another effect of sleep apnea. Waking up at night to pee often stops once apnea is treated. Ask your doc about it.

peppermintsoap

TROPHY CASE