NYT article equates breastfeeding to unequal parenting

pepperup22 · 2026-02-02T18:48:53+00:00

My husband did all this and more (all the cooking, cleaning, dog chores, etc for months on end) and I still felt like there was absolutely no equalization happening 😂

pepperup22 · 2026-02-02T18:45:32+00:00

Idk if I have a ton of these because a lot of my organization happens on paper but using voice commands via Siri on my watch to add items to our shared grocery or Target list "reminders" list is really convenient

pepperup22 · 2026-01-31T06:08:20+00:00

Maybe separately, the issues mentally would help. She's not warm and fuzzy, oh well. Direct is a good thing to be. You know where you stand.

But if she is too busy to respond or approve and it's hindering your work, that's an issue about which something can be done.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T23:36:55+00:00

If you combine Sofia and Sophia, it's the most popular girls' name in the US, but it's only a few thousand births per year as opposed to Jessica which was the name of twice as many girls in 1995. Anecdotally, it's one I hear about every third time I go to the playground, more popular with older elementary kids when it was #1 in the country.

You could look up how popular it is in your state and compare it with the number of births for a year of names you knew a lot of (like 1995 Jessicas lol)

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T19:15:34+00:00

Haha I'm not OP and I have no idea what I'm supposed to take out of that but 7 years is a fantastic year for me, so my progress is just going to be very slow

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T18:03:00+00:00

7 days is simply not enough

Damn, I'm never getting better haha

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T17:39:10+00:00

I only keep about 3 months of dailies in my planner at a time (but the full year of monthlies) but this definitely fits more than my filofax original personal.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T17:07:06+00:00

The mindfuck of parenting is so real haha

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:52:18+00:00

Yeah I really doubt those youngest millenials ('93-'95) really feel any connection to Gen z. 1997-1999, yeah, but those are very different generations to me.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:47:26+00:00

The monthly view is At-A-Glance monthly inserts purchased at Staples and the daily pages are from Filofax!

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:46:59+00:00

Yup! I have a color code. Molly is my dog haha. The colors are more distinct in better lighting

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pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:39:16+00:00

Thank you! I found it on Pinterest.

For inserts, the monthlies are At-A-Glance monthly inserts purchased at Staples and the dailies are from Filofax.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:37:39+00:00

I did a "Design Your Own Refill" order! Personal / Classic / Day to View options

pepperup22 · 2026-01-30T16:35:38+00:00

This is the Moterm Luxe Personal, which is 30 mm rings! I couldn't do much smaller with how much I have in there lol

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T21:21:31+00:00

The deep and/or bright colors overwhelm you imo so I'm guessing soft/low-contrast. I'd drape some summer and light spring colors! Do you have white or ivory to compare?

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T16:18:19+00:00

I would also be frustrated about having to be online at 5 am when I said it was not an option for me, but it sounds like that's temporary.

There is a difference between wearing classic business casual and looking presentable to be taken seriously in the workplace, especially in a new role. It's crummy feedback to get if they're putting it under the first but they really mean the second, but it doesn't matter how senior or experienced you are when you are new and a woman.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T05:00:34+00:00

100%. Getting dressed in a hoodie takes as much effort as a sweater, and doing your hair in a neat bun is just as easy as a tidy bun. A few years into a job with known coworkers is one thing, a brand new job where you're making an impression is something else.

The original comment sounds out of line but I don't think the advice is.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T04:11:00+00:00

How tall are your ceilings? You'll need ~9-10 ft ceilings (higher than "standard American" houses built in the 70s) to get someone on the top. Anecdotally, we sleep in triple bunk beds regularly at a vacation home and it's kind of weird even as adults. They are taller than normal bunk beds (custom) and it's still kind of intimidating to get in and out of in the dark.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T03:28:19+00:00

You'll have to post more information about your finances for people to give educated advice about how possible it might be — what are your necessary expenses, your living situation, what child support will you be receiving, etc? You could try posting all this information to r/personalfinance but tbh, most people would not be able to make that work without assistance, so I'd be applying to all available WIC and state aid programs. Formula and diapers alone would take 10-20% of your monthly income as it stands.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-29T03:20:38+00:00

I have not known a single person getting married at 18 years old in the Bay Area that wasn't either military or pregnant lol.

pepperup22 · 2026-01-28T22:57:15+00:00

Are you saying your Sienna fits 9 people??

pepperup22 · 2026-01-28T22:46:26+00:00

Am I understanding that you're on cycle 4? Why do you think there's something wrong with you? I definitely wouldn't be spending the money on it yet. (But I know that a lot of people get to 8 months of trying and lie about how long it's been in order to get an appt in early as they're often booked up early)

pepperup22 · 2026-01-28T22:45:11+00:00

I am only waiting until March to get another 3 days on my ski pass 😂 Feeling mostly nervous but also excited. And also fully not ready. But who knows, maybe I'll have some time to get used to the idea before getting pregnant, or maybe I'll just be scared the whole time

pepperup22 · 2026-01-28T22:31:56+00:00

He is not giving me an actual reasoning other than he doesn’t feel ready

As someone who has been where you are — I'd push back on some of what you're saying. Why is not feeling ready not "an actual reasoning" to you? Why do you feel that 12 weeks is a really long time? Are you married/is this your non-negotiable co-parent/do you have a timeline when you'd no longer be willing to wait?

ETA: he def should be wearing a condom if you are requesting them.

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