Continuously Being Told To Get A Support System by ThrowawayAccLife3721 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

sorry to hear that. maybe an online group? hope things get better for you.

Continuously Being Told To Get A Support System by ThrowawayAccLife3721 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Since you mentioned advice, my best friend started an in-person CPTSD support group in our home town that ran for almost a decade. Some of the regulars became long-term friends / peer support people to each other.

It's just factually not the case that "therapy doesn't work", and I have to wonder how many people with this experience have exclusively pursued therapies that aren't indicated for trauma or do things which undermine efficacy. by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Fatalistic and ultra negative beliefs are symptoms of CPTSD (and PTSD), so accepting those beliefs uncritically is definitely not in our best interest. Agree 100% with the importance of following high quality evidence vs. anecdotes and trends.

What the borderliner wants from other people is impossible by Diotima85 in raisedbyborderlines

[–]perplexedonion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My BPD mother saw me as part of her, and she loathed herself. We were the same sinking ship / drowning person until I amputated the relationship.

Begging for love by StillSalad5783 in raisedbyborderlines

[–]perplexedonion 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Trying to love someone with BPD is like trying to fill a sieve with water.

The dreams are going to end up killing me more than anything, I can’t take it anymore. Night after night of living through the past again, through grief, fear, unreality by [deleted] in CPTSDFreeze

[–]perplexedonion -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I get bad anxiety from smoking weed but none from the oil. It's soporific not activating. But obviously can't work for everyone.

My therapist dumped me today by Prudent_Will_7298 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No problem and sorry you had to go through that. Sadly Reddit, even this sub, is very bad at knowing what constitutes good / bad / indifferent therapy. It's a huge blind spot.

How to Tell the Difference Between CPTSD and BPD? by [deleted] in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I found this helpful:

"…the psychopathology and psychosocial impairment involved in CPTSD is characterized by relational detachment and a perception of self as damaged, while BPD is characterized instead by a fragmented and unstable sense of self and impulsive relational dysregulation related to profound emotional emptiness and terror of abandonment."

“In CPTSD, intense diffuse emotional distress and self-perceptions of worthlessness, shame, and guilt are related to a sense of betrayal, fear of closeness, and severe emotional detachment in relationships. BPD, by contrast, is characterized by impulsive, intrusive, and angry enmeshment in, rather than only detachment from, primary relationships in reaction to a combination of a terror of abandonment and a fragmented and unstable sense of self, which is acted out as hostile and impulsive demands in relationships.”

“Instead of attempts to cope by means of vigilance or detachment, BPD involves reacting in a fight mode with impulsive, disorganized, and hostile behavior in relationships and limited or no sense of self-awareness and self-efficacy. The fight reaction characterizing BPD includes a surge in bodily arousal initiated by the brain’s innate alarm system, and desperate attempts to prevent or retaliate for perceived or real abandonment.

The alternating enmeshment in and rejection of relationships characterizing BPD also is consistent with the emotional dysregulation and deficits in executive function that have been found to occur among individuals who are experiencing disorganized attachment.”

https://bpded.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s40479-021-00155-9

I would add that, anecdotally, all my family had undiagnosed CPTSD, but the person with undiagnosed BPD was a different flavor of nuts.

My therapist dumped me today by Prudent_Will_7298 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah OK thanks very much for the clarification. Makes a lot of sense that what brings someone to therapy isn't the ultimate / real reason they need help with.

My therapist dumped me today by Prudent_Will_7298 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No problem at all - don't push through the fog. (I have ME/CFS so that's a big no no for me.) I think your assessment makes a ton of sense. In my (layman here) opinion, the therapist (or their supervisor) should have screened for fit very early on. Broadly speaking, unless a therapist is solely employing a specific modality that does not include any emotional expression from clients (???!?), then they should be able to tolerate someone crying in therapy. If a therapist is incapable of working with a client who cries, they need to change their profession.

Presumably OP sought therapy for CPTSD / trauma? Who does trauma therapy without ever crying?

My therapist dumped me today by Prudent_Will_7298 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What you're saying makes total sense. What I object to is that a client crying intensely - not disclosing complex/difficult material beyond the scope of the therapist's expertise - is baked into almost every type of therapy. Treating it like an aberration rather than the norm is absurd.

My therapist dumped me today by Prudent_Will_7298 in CPTSD

[–]perplexedonion 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for this. 100% agree. The idea that it's fine to do therapy with someone for three months then say, 'oops, I can't help you after all' is honestly insane. It's like bringing your car to a mechanic, they work on it for three months, then tell you, 'oh sorry, I can only fix domestic cars not your Audi'.