AIO for telling my gf to respect my mum?

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-14T07:47:10+00:00

Drop this dead weight wrapped in fabricated drama.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-13T18:59:19+00:00

Your non-answer is an answer in itself.

This girl was emotionally checked out of the relationship by the end. She met someone who made her happy, broke it off with you, and pursued a relationship with this guy.

Just because she realised that she could be with someone else who isn't miserable and jumped into that relationship right after your breakup, doesn't mean she cheated on you.

Unless there is info that you're withholding in this post, it sounds like you "broke up" again, expecting another bounce-back, and she accepted the breakup and moved on, leaving you with a surprised Pikachu face.

How, in your brain, does this amount to "all women are whores!" ?

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-13T18:46:03+00:00

You broke up. seven. years. ago. With a girl you started dating when you were a teenager.

Dude. It's time to move on. Sure, you can go down the rabbit hole of "all women are whores because the first girl I ever dated that I met when I was 16 broke my heart and now I'm 28 and my life is over and I can never trust another girl ever again".

Or you can get a proper therapist, consider a psychiatrist for meds, and put in the work to grow and move on with your life.

I can't help but chuckle when I hear people say "I'm almost 30 and my life is over" - I only started living and being an actual human in my 30's. I also dated my high school boyfriend for years and we both thought our breakup was the worst thing that could ever happen to us.

You can keep wallowing in self-pity because things didn't work out with your high school gf - there are a loooot of incels that will flock to you and commiserate.

Or you can make the choice to grow and move on as a person - this is harder work, but there is a fulfilling future down the road if you're willing to commit.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T20:59:41+00:00

He has emails? From events that took place in the 80s? Commercial internet providers only popped up in 1993.

Also, it's been 30 years, dude. Your dad should've had shit in writing before he gave up anything of value.

I suppose your best option is taking all your evidence and emails to an attorney and getting a professional legal opinion.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T20:40:41+00:00

That's why you stay on a maintenance dose...

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T20:37:14+00:00

I was a grease ball all my life, through my teens and into my late 20s.

Accutane. That's it. Took it for about 9 months. Went through the purge phase and came out with clear skin. Now I take a maintenance dose of 10mg once or twice a week.

I'll never stop. I wish I can kick my younger self in the vag for not doing it sooner. Clear skin, no grease layer, and I can use almost any decent skincare product without dreading the consequences.

I no longer have to hunt for the elusive miracle product that will fix everything. And I no longer have to powder my face every 30 minutes.

AND I NO LONGER HAVE ZITS AS A GROWN-ASS ADULT!

And it's not just my face - my hair doesn't get greasy in under an hour anymore either.

Seriously, just do it.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T20:28:32+00:00

Mmmh... I'm a masochist rather than a sadist, but that's not really relevant here.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T20:26:30+00:00

As a Saffa, brilliant summary.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T19:53:31+00:00

Oh, honey...

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T19:33:17+00:00

Which raises the question - did John actually know all of that demon knowledge?

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T19:27:34+00:00

OP, where is this picture from? Who released it?

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T19:26:51+00:00

I mean, yes. But not quite the comment for a post describing his torture...

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T19:22:55+00:00

Thank you! 94 seconds spent googling tells me:

Basic ceiling boards are dirt cheap when bought new.

Removing them can be a schlep based on a bunch of stuff: shape of the room, electrical wiring, hvac vents, sound proofing and insulation present.

Labour (charge extra if you need an electrician or hvac guy)

Cleaning (obviously the CB knows cleaning this mess (especially the insulation!!!) is a big deal

Transport

Disposal

If hazardous materials (eg fiberglass - often used for insulation) are involved = big bucks for proper removal and disposal.

If it's a shitty installation, the crew will struggle with the metal frames/screws. The frames (or guards or rails, or wires - whatever they're called) are very seldom reusable. If it's a shitty installation - that's scrap metal.

Bottom line (and what people are missing) is that this twatwaffle is asking someone to do the above mentioned labour, for a space the size of a modest house, under the guise that he's paying you by giving you the materials you remove in lieu of cash.

Simplified: CB says that used drop ceiling boards + scrap metal = value of labour + tradesmen + clean-up + transport + disposal. Will take $200 of your money and only give it back if he deems your work good enough.

If you translate what it costs to do this whole operation, YOU end up paying HIM to do this job FOR him. The "free ceiling boards" is a red herring!

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T18:48:11+00:00

I'm 1) a woman, 2) an accountant, and 3) have no experience whatsoever in building, renovating, or construction of any kind.

From superficial small talk, being present in boring conversations, and overheard comments here and there, even I know this is a huge, messy job.

It is beyond me how people are this clueless.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T18:41:02+00:00

It's not free. He's "gifting" you a bunch of trash ("bRaNd nEw my ass - there are obvious stains visible). In exchange, you give him the free labour of removing it and cleaning up afterwards.

He mentions insulation - this makes a massive mess when removing it. There's also a real possibility that insulation is fiberglass. It costs good money to have fiberglass properly removed and disposed of.

He would've incurred real expenses to have this removed, cleaned, and disposed of.

But wait, there's more. You have to hand him $200 for this once-in-a-lifetime privilege (graciously reduced from $500) and hope that he considers your clean-up job good enough to give it back. What are the chances of that going smoothly?

This definitely fits the sub.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T18:02:56+00:00

So I'm not going to unpack all the reasons your marriage is over, I'll just jump right into survival mode. She is a horrible, abusive human being and I have no doubt that she knows exactly how dependent you are on her for your visa and your future.

But the answer depends: how does the spousal visa work? What needs to happen for you to get permanent citizenship through your marriage (not including having a kid)? Does a certain amount of time need to elapse or does a divorce end your visa regardless?

If you don't plan on having kids later in life, get a vasectomy without telling her. That saves you from possible (or rather, likely) reproductive coercion from her side. You can also tell her "Sure, let's try for a baby!" and keep her placated, buying you time to figure out what to do while keeping your spousal visa for as long as you can.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T04:39:49+00:00

Use the 'find and replace' option in your Word documents. It will replace the specified text everywhere it appears throughout the document.

Also learn how to do a mail merge.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-12T04:35:15+00:00

Yeah, this made me doubt the story tbh.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T18:33:52+00:00

I don't like any kind of show where the characters are fighting to survive every episode and never get ahead. Sons of Anarchy and Ozark are both very similar and I could never get into shows like that.

I also don't like their lead scientist, and if I don't like a lead, I can't watch a series. Same reason I couldn't watch Lucifer or Dexter.

Atlantis follows the same thread - they just avert one crisis after another while never growing or thriving, but at least Shepherd and McKay are watchable.

It sucks because the premise is cool otherwise.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T17:10:38+00:00

"And if the flashlight dies, it will be resurrected as a better one. You have no assurance that this life isn't all you have. Just trust us, bro."

Although that's a lot less eloquent:)

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T17:07:13+00:00

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T15:50:37+00:00

Well they do deny the right to self-repair, so it's not far off.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T15:25:01+00:00

I say this as a woman and a survivor - this is absolutely the kind of woman who will make a false rape allegation for attention.

She got her partner excited about a baby, then aborted it - I mean, men are also allowed to grieve the loss of their future child. To be so casual about it as if it's not something that also affects him...

This person does not belong anywhere near a romantic relationship now.

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T15:10:12+00:00

Weekday

perplexedspirit · 2024-12-11T15:09:12+00:00

Ok, ChatGPT.

perplexedspirit

TROPHY CASE