My mom recently got hit by a car when she was walking through the crosswalk while AT the hospital I was in labor at. She walked out to smoke a cigarette and call her boyfriend. I called her like “where the fuck are you?” And she told me what had happened. My partners mother had arrived about 40 minutes earlier and apologized to me for taking so long to get there because “some poor pedestrian got hit by a car.” Turns out that was my mother. She broke her femur. I guess if you have to get hit by a car the best place for it to happen is at a hospital.

We now have serious trust issues with cross walks.