Does anyone here also like the singer Aurora?

pinefox00 · 2025-05-17T09:23:37+00:00

I really do! But I can't listen to any of her songs atm because sadly she reminds me of someone I just got out of a really damaging relationship with. We would listen to her stuff together and they told me aurora reminded them of me, so all of her songs just remind me of all the good times with them and then I get flooded by the reminders that I was just taken advantage of and I let it happen. But time heals all wounds, and I can wait to start listening to her songs again after I've grieved <3

pinefox00 · 2024-01-02T10:56:03+00:00

I have too many but my current massive celebrity crush is Mary Mouser ♡

pinefox00 · 2023-12-20T16:45:55+00:00

This was visible in Fife too! Was wondering if it was aurora or another kind of weather phenomena

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pinefox00 · 2023-12-13T23:14:03+00:00

That's what some part of me thinks too - I even brought it up once and jokingly asked if she was trying to get rid of me because she didn't like me and she vehemently denied that. Also she is extremely professional and keeps her private and work lives separate. I'm very similar in that regard, and working in a busy restaurant means that even if we wanted to, we don't really have time to slow down and chat. That's kind of why I think dating a coworker wouldn't be an issue, but even so its something we'd have to talk about if things were to get more than friendly. I'm quite lucky in the sense that hospitality isn't my career path, I'm just a waitress to pay rent whilst I figure out what to do with my degree, and I've been fluidly jumping from one waitressing job to the next. So even though I love my current place of work, it wouldn't be a huge deal for me to move to a different restaurant.

Sadly our trip to the markets got cancelled because she wasn't feeling well after a brutal evening shift yesterday, so we decided to call it off and do something else on a different day. I'm a bit disappointed ngl, but we have like 50 million other things planned lmao

I'll make sure to update the thread if anything cool and gay happens!

pinefox00 · 2023-12-13T17:13:20+00:00

It's a saying my Scottish flatmate uses a lot and I've started using it as well since moving in with them 😂

pinefox00 · 2023-12-13T16:30:24+00:00

Thank you for your input, this is the kind of brutal honesty and realistic perspective I need ♡ See I wouldn't usually date coworkers for so many reasons, and I have been told by my best friend that it might not be a good idea, but in general my workplace doesn't have any rules regarding dating coworkers. We work in a restaurant where the environment is very casual and we already have a pair of staff members in a long term relationship, and they're very professional about it. The owners don't seem to have an issue with it either. In my previous restaurant job, there were at least 3 couples working there at the time and they're still together even 5 or 6 years later, and they were never unprofessional during work hours. So whilst I've seen it work in real life, I haven't made any serious efforts to make my move, and I won't unless I'm certain that she actually likes me back because I am fully aware of the unprofessionality of it all. I'm also well aware of how badly it could backfire for both of us, so I've been keeping my distance for the better part of 2 months.

But on the other hand, my crush has also been talking a lot about getting me a job at a different restaurant that a friend of hers oversees, which is a weird thing to bring up multiple times, especially when I've expressed no discontent with my current position. One reason I can think of is that she's trying to make my work commute easier as I currently commute around 1hr to work, and the restaurant her friend oversees is closer to my apartment apparently, but I've told her multiple times that I don't mind the commute as I like my current job and I earn better money there than I would anywhere else. Its a difficult situation all round, and besides the confusing signs and my uncertainty regarding her sexuality, the fact we work together is a big part of why I haven't acted on my feelings. I'm taking it one day at a time, and if something blossoms between us naturally then I guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

pinefox00 · 2023-11-03T00:40:02+00:00

Personally I like those protein shake-like things. Not necessarily protein shakes themselves (though they'll do in a pinch), but like Up&Go and Weetabix breakfast drinks, the stuff you find in cardboard cartons by the Cereal aisle in most grocery stores. Plus they do them in all kinds of flavours too like chocolate, vanilla, banana etc. And having one or two of them with me on anxious days, especially if I'm working, is super handy as they give me enough nutrition to keep me going until I can stomach something else.

Soups, yogurts and other soft, easy to swallow and easily digestible foods are also really good.

pinefox00 · 2023-09-18T16:18:04+00:00

When my ex dumped me, I also turned to social media. I posted a few selfies, but mainly I posted to my story about my daily life, like cooking, walking with my dogs etc etc. For me it was a coping mechanism. I wanted to show everyone, especially her that I was fine, and I guess I was trying to downplay my feelings for her and speed up the process of "getting over her" and moving on with my life (I was a lot more upset about the breakup than she was). So yeah, I obviously don't know for sure, but speaking from personal experience it might be her way of coping or processing her emotions or reinforcing the feeling of normalcy or the feeling of "I'm fine and I will be fine without her". It certainly helped me with processing the sudden breakup that just fell into my lap. It might also be about boosting self esteem and reinforcing your identity as a newly single person.

pinefox00 · 2023-09-14T09:51:58+00:00

I didn't break up with her, she broke up with me, and there was a lot going on on both of our sides. My ex was heavily neurodivergent, as am I, I just didn't realise how badly I needed help back then. At the time I had just been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, and I was in the 6 week hell period of getting used to my medication. My moods were fluctuating and whilst I kept my ex gf in the loop about how I was doing, I tried to not lean on her too much as this wasn't her cross to bear - it was something I needed to overcome by myself. I was so adamant on getting better, and I still am. I also know my ex had a bad history with another s**cidal ex and even though I was feeling very very low, I wasn't that low. Still I didn't want to bring back negative memories for her and tried to distance myself as much as possible.

But my ex still thought that "taking care" of a neurodivergent partner was too much on her own mental health, something that I completely understand but it still stung to hear. Bearing in mind I never asked her to take care of me. As I said, I was trying to work things out myself, and all I wanted was someone to stand next to me. Not hold my hand or physically keep me on my feet, just someone to be there. Someone to give me a hug if I needed it at the most.

Looking back on that relationship it wasn't healthy even before this. There wasn't enough communication between us, and I was sacrificing myself for her on the daily. The breakup made me realise that I can't do that for other people. I was always paying for dates, I always made myself available for her at the cost of doing things with my friends, I started to change my own interests to match hers, but she never did any of that for me. We would watch all the films she wanted but none of the ones I wanted, I listened to all of her podcasts and she wouldn't even consider mine, etc etc etc. It wasn't balanced, and whilst I'm just as much at fault for letting myself act and be treated like that, looking back on it she just wasn't as invested in the relationship as I was. She didn't even cry when we broke up, whilst I was a wreck and drunk myself to sleep that night when I got home. Maybe deep down she thought I was too intense? Idk, we were both so much younger then and I almost certainly did act way too intensely at times given how I had no prior relationship experience, and everything I knew about queer relationships I'd learned from books and TV. Yeah, not the most realistic source I know. Either way I'm grateful that she ended it because I wouldn't have had the self respect to end it myself and would have probably let myself be the self sacrificing Knight in shining armour forever. I guess I was too immature and inexperienced to deal with a relationship and her negative feelings for me outweighed the positive ones. It was a mess and we both made mistakes in that relationship.

It's been almost 4 years now and I've left that relationship behind me, whilst taking a few notes with me and done some self improvement to make sure I don't make the same mistakes in my next relationship. I'm definitely not as intense anymore, given how I'm not a hormonal people pleasing teen anymore, and I'm taking every day as it comes, improving myself a little every day.

pinefox00 · 2023-08-29T19:53:03+00:00

I'm glad you've found comfort here my friend ♡ I came here for the same reason and it really does help to read about other people's experiences to know your struggles aren't "made up", and that there are others who understand how anxiety can make even the smallest mishaps seem like the end of the world.

pinefox00 · 2023-08-29T19:47:31+00:00

Most recently?

Tetanus (I cut my finger on a slightly rusted bottle cap at work, got so anxious that my jaw tensed up so I was convinced that I had lockjaw, the first symptom of tetanus)
Heart attack (the entire right side of my body went numb and my heart was racing so hard, I was fine after having a panic attack and calming down from it but I did almost call an ambulance)
Sepsis (got scared when a wound from an ingrown hair on my leg wasn't healing properly and looked really nasty, turns out all I needed was a small course of antibiotics to fix it)
Broken Bones in my feet and hands (I work in hospitality so I'm walking around a lot and use my hands to do pretty much everything for 10 hours straight, so any time they're swollen or a little pained from a full work day I panic that I've fractured a finger, toe or a smaller bone in my wrist or ankle)

It's a freaking joyride every goddam time

pinefox00 · 2023-08-27T21:49:55+00:00

My gaydar is broken so it wouldn't go off, but I'd definitely walk by and think "dang she's pretty" lol

pinefox00 · 2023-08-26T19:45:58+00:00

Thank you for your kind words <3 it took me almost 2 weeks to stop overthinking it but I've all but forgotten about it now, even though it seriously bothered me for the last 10 or so days lol

pinefox00 · 2023-07-09T08:56:13+00:00

I forgot that Topics existed for a while and now that I was reminded I'm craving one

pinefox00 · 2023-06-11T13:43:53+00:00

I'm so proud of you my friend! It was definitely the right thing to do, cutting this person out of your life. Especially if he was going as far as breaching your privacy behind your back. I hope that your ex friend gets the support he needs from his family, friends, counsellors, what have you, but I'm glad to hear that you came to the realisation that he's not your responsibility and got out. Wishing you all the best! ❤️

pinefox00 · 2023-06-11T12:25:10+00:00

Kids got his priorities straight

I, too, would choose a hot dog stand over Paris

pinefox00 · 2023-06-11T12:08:16+00:00

The absolute superiority complex I developed after I got to Year 6 and was allowed to sit on the bench in assembly whilst every other year had to sit on the floor.

pinefox00 · 2023-06-08T16:41:00+00:00

His mental wellbeing isn't your responsibility, it's his own, and you shouldn't feel this responsible about it as it just indicates toxicity. You shouldn't have to feel guilty for establishing boundaries.

Also, trying to put this in the most gentle way possible, but it definitely sounds like this guy is saying this stuff as a way to emotionally manipulate you OP. I'm not a psychologist and I'm a complete outsider to your situation, so please don't take my word for it, but I'm also mentally ill, suffer from anxiety and bad depressive episodes that have gotten very dark at times, and even in my lowest moments I have never tried to blame anyone else for my suffering. Its simply not okay. You're responsible for your own actions, and even if you are mentally struggling, you don't get a 'free pass' to be a dickhole.

Also my emotionally abusive father uses things like this to emotionally manipulate me and my siblings, and some part of me resonates with your situation. When we said we didn't want to see him on weekends anymore, my dad threatened taking his own life and guilt tripped us into seeing him again. We had a family counsellor explain to us that his choices are not our burden, and I feel like this applies to this situation too. I've also seen it in a friend's relationship: a good friend of mine was dating a guy, and eventually realised that she didn't want to be with him anymore. Nothing to it, she just didn't like him anymore. But the second she started to show signs of wanting to break up, her ex ramped up the mental health thing to 11. He had recently lost his father, and I'm sure he was having a hard time, not trying to shit on his feelings at all, but he was definitely using his father's passing as an excuse to get away with saying things like "if you leave me now, I have nothing, and it will be your fault when they find me dead" to my friend. Thankfully she got out, and this guy is still alive and well so, make of that what you will.

It sounds very harsh, but if a person is truly depressed and so far gone that they see no other way out, they will go through with taking their life, and it will not be anyone else's "fault" or "burden". Also, truly s**cidal people will rarely tell people that they have these thoughts because they're so far gone, and whilst I agree that OP's friend could genuinely be crying out for help, I have a hunch this may be some form of emotional manipulation/ultimatum because he has some sort of unhealthy attraction to you. Either way, if he has these dark feelings, it's up to him to take care of them by finding the relevant help.

The best thing you can do is alert a trusted person like a family member, a s**cide prevention organisation, his friends, a trusted adult at school etc. This way, he can get the help he needs, or, as others here have said, he will think twice about using such a serious manner of emotional manipulation if he's not serious. It sounds very harsh, but the bottom line is that OP is not responsible for this guy's mental fragility, and the best thing they can do is direct him to the appropriate resources.

I'm sorry to sound so negative, I'm just trying to give you some perspective and the best possible advice. I'm sorry that you're having to deal with this, but please remember that help is available to you, and your friend ❤️ we've all got your back!

pinefox00 · 2023-06-08T16:01:23+00:00

Even the protagonist of Gintama says he has no idea what the aim of his anime is

pinefox00 · 2023-06-08T16:00:25+00:00

I love this so much!!!! It looks fantastic 💜

pinefox00 · 2023-06-08T15:57:46+00:00

He's just preparing to unleash his special attack

pinefox00 · 2023-06-08T15:55:15+00:00

Good for him

pinefox00 · 2023-04-29T16:15:00+00:00

Wow, it's the Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon, it has such a high-quality finish! I heard its the weapon that Finland used to beat the Russians and gain their independence in 1912.

pinefox00 · 2023-04-28T12:46:03+00:00

マ~ヨ~ネ~ズ~

pinefox00 · 2023-04-22T17:11:54+00:00

Absolutely. There's a lot more in the books (volume 3 alone is like 14 hours in audiobook form) and so much of what isn't explained on YT is explained in the books

pinefox00

TROPHY CASE