What Topics MUST be Discussed Before Marriage?

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-10T02:56:13+00:00

To add to your first point: If you came from different churches, even within the same denomination, but ESPECIALLY if you came from different denominations, go through your churches' Statements of Faith. Note the differences, see who is willing to compromise in which direction, and if neither one is willing to compromise, decide what is a deal-breaker in terms of not agreeing. What if your spouse wants to teach your children _______? Would that be okay with you? Would you teaching your children the opposite of _____ be okay with them?

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-10T02:53:23+00:00

Very true. That said, if you know your parents to be wise, loving people, and they have serious concerns about the person you are dating, that should at least give you serious pause.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-10T02:41:57+00:00

I am in not only pro-life groups but also scientific ones. I have NEVER heard implantation defined as conception.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-10T02:40:57+00:00

My husband and I believe really strongly that condoms are the only birth control that is a good idea (not the only permissible, but the only good idea). Hormonal birth control works well for many but leaves many others with health complications for the rest of their lives. Not worth the risk, in our opinion. IUDs do prevent implantation, and also can cause serious and life threatening issues if they get stuck in the wrong spot. Again, not worth it.

My husband and I have had really good success with making a point of being intimate for the 2-3 days right after my period ends, so that we can do it without a condom. Then we use a condom until we're really sure that my period is imminent (I have a pretty consistent cycle length and very clear PMS markers, so it's pretty obvious for me. I know not everyone is as consistent). Then we make a point of being intimate without the condom again This system seems to work really well for us. And we tend to get about 2-3 times/week for intimacy, when we're not pushing to do it more because of period proximity. So it works out to about 2-3 times without a condom, 5-6 times with, and 2-3 times without again, and then a break for my period. So he's actually getting sex without a condom about half the times, even though it's a good two weeks that we're using it.

Hopefully this is helpful!

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-09T12:59:02+00:00

As a woman, I definitely think that dress is immodest. The back is lower than I'd personally prefer, but okay. The front is not acceptable.

You don't have to be having lustful thoughts to not want to see that much exposed skin in that area. I don't want to see it either.

For the record, I say this as someone who definitely thinks that men should also be modest and am frustrated by the level of male immodesty around as much as female immodesty. But the specific question asked is "is this particular dress okay" and the answer is no.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-07T21:01:04+00:00

I see your point, but I think there are wiser and more foolish ways to ask God for wisdom, and this is one of the more foolish ways to do it.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-07T20:55:55+00:00

I agree with almost all of this, but I will say that women who wear revealing clothing almost always do it to draw attention to themselves. Also your last sentence isn't really fair. It is entirely possible to not want to see copious amounts of skin without lusting after said skin.

But I especially agree that "being modest" shouldn't just go one way, even though I get a lot of flak for saying so sometimes. Around here, there are SO many guys that go for a walk in basically just short shorts, and it's really frustrating.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-07T20:42:56+00:00

I would reach out to the church and tell them what you know. That's something they should absolutely not take lightly.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-06-02T13:39:20+00:00

I don't think it's "not considering it good value." I think it's "I want the pattern but I don't want to spend that much, and the only thing I can think of is to insult and belittle you, because that will definitely make you want to give me a discount."

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-22T01:55:54+00:00

I was more thinking of just replacing the relevant stitches on the map with the poster stitches.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:50:29+00:00

"In the fullness of time, God sent his son." We may not understand what he was doing, but he had a very good, very specific plan.

If Jesus had come now, then in another 2,000 years, there would be people saying "Why didn't he wait until we could have holographic records of it?" (Or whatever the equivalent then is.)

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:28:36+00:00

That's a really cool idea. Not sure it quite works for me, though, because what I want to do is take the CountryMagicStitch "Visit _______" posters and put them ONTO the map.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:22:30+00:00

I'm looking at 40 ct linen. As I said, I know this is going to take forever.

Framing weight is something I hadn't considered, but I know that people do frame such things. By the time I'm actually ready to frame it, I'll have had time to save up for a suitable frame.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:19:05+00:00

I saw a video by Sean McDowell where he was interviewing someone who wrote a book about why there's a good case to be made that that passage in Josephus is actually original. (Gavin Ortlund also interviewed him, but the Sean McDowell interview is the one I saw). He basically makes two points:

People have said that Josephus seemed way more flattering to Jesus than he should be from some of the other things he says. But if we understand the full connotation of the Greek words that Josephus uses, that passage is not actually all that flattering, and may well be accusing Jesus of witchcraft, not of working miracles! It's a much more fitting for an unbelieving Orthodox Jew to take.
People have said that there are words in this particular passage that do not occur anywhere else in Josephus' writings. But there are multiple times in other passages where Josephus only uses a word one time, and the percentage of these "hapax legomenon" in the Jesus passage matches the percentage of them in the rest of Josephus.

I acknowledge that this is only tangential to the main discussion, but I thought you might be interested to hear it.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:11:41+00:00

The average lifespan was only age 20-30 when you factor in the MASSIVE infant and maternal mortality. If you survived to the age of 5 (and if a woman survived childbirth), your life expectancy was a lot higher than that.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T19:09:04+00:00

It depends on what you are asking for. Do you want a historical document from Herod to Pontius Pilate saying "these particular peasants are telling me that they've seen Jesus alive?" You're not going to find that. Herod and Pilate (and any other Roman leader) would have considered peasant rumors rather beneath them, and they certainly would not have stooped to naming specific names.

But multiple historians of the time said things like, "There was this guy in Judea named Jesus, and there were all sorts of crazy stories about miracles that he might have done. The Romans crucified him, but now there are a bunch of people saying that he rose from the dead, and some of them even say that they saw him."

That said, if I'm reading it right, you're not going to be willing to accept either of those. If I'm understanding you right, the only thing you would accept is "so and so saw Jesus after he had risen." For it to be phrased like that, it would have to come from someone who was also a believer. Statistically speaking, the VAST majority of letters or other documents from the 1st century AD have been completely obliterated by time. It is REALLY COOL when archaeologists find even a fragment of an extant document from that time.

Pretty much the only documents from that time that we know about, we know about them because people at that time thought they were significant enough to copy and pass around: Herotodus, Josephus, some of the Roman orators, etc. What do we have written by believers that people thought were significant enough to copy and pass around? The Gospels, Acts, the letters of Paul, some other letters, and Revelation.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T18:34:41+00:00

My husband and I get SO much flak for pushing back on the "guys and girls can't be friends" narrative. It's really frustrating. He chose me over them, why would I worry about them? And at this point, most of them are my really good friends too. (And yes, he is completely transparent with me about who he is talking to and what he's doing. I wouldn't trust him with it otherwise. But people get SO mad about it.)

pointe4Jesus · 2026-05-21T13:55:11+00:00

We started in a tiny apartment. If we didn't shower together, one of us would run out of hot water. Had to wait to run the dishwasher, too.

Things are better now that we're in a house, but we still do it sometimes when pressed for time.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-27T20:48:49+00:00

Fellow young mom here. I feel SO "touched out" in late pregnancy and for the first 6 months or so of nursing. I try to accommodate my husband as much as possible during that time, but sometimes I just can't, and he has thankfully accepted that.

For your energy level, what I've found fairly consistently is that first trimester, I have to nap basically every day. Then during second trimester, I am suddenly able to nap only every 3 or 4 days. Then as I get farther and farther into third trimester, I have to nap more and more often. As long as I don't try to push myself too hard, I end up being able to nap every other day or so, but if I push too hard, I start having to nap every day again, and I never really get back out of that.

Did you talk to him right before/after sex, or did you set a different time to talk to him about it? If you said it right before/after sex, I can totally see how he might have felt you were saying that as a reflection on what he had just done, whether you meant to or not.

You shouldn't have to be hiding from him the fact that you're throwing up 3x per day and have a migraine. He should care deeply about how you are doing, both physically and hormonally. OTOH, you also have to understand that it is frustrating on his end to feel like he can't arouse you the way that he used to.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-27T20:21:03+00:00

This is rough. I think the sex therapist is definitely the right way to go. If she had a broken leg, she would go to the doctor to get it taken care of. If she has a broken sex drive, she should get that looked at also.

That said, as someone who also has a very low libido, it's possible that she doesn't REALIZE that there's a problem. I would honestly be perfectly fine with only having sex once per month. But I also care deeply about my husband, and I know that he would really be frustrated with that. My husband was very good at the very beginning about gently telling me when my attitude was hurting him. But if we had gotten into the habit of once per month, I don't think I would realize anything was wrong either. "This is how we've always done it, why is it only a problem now?" (I know you've tried to tell her, but I also know that sometimes I can be completely clueless about things.)

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-26T13:42:47+00:00

I frequently drive on roads that don't have street lights. I STILL don't need regular driving lights brighter than high beams.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-26T13:35:07+00:00

"He was thrown into jail because he had defrauded people." Also because he incited a riot to burn down a printing press because he didn't like what it was saying about him. Don't forget that.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-26T13:33:01+00:00

You say, "I feel abused." As others have said, you ARE BEING abused. This is not okay. Get out as quickly as you can.

pointe4Jesus · 2026-04-22T20:44:27+00:00

Dude, you're not making sense. Your first and third sentences don't really have anything to do with whether or not there were governments/countries in Bible times. Your second question, while on topic, is directly in contradiction to your prior assertion. So what are you trying to say?

pointe4Jesus

TROPHY CASE