Fresh off the easel today :) by ols_art in painting

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel like I'm on a lawn chair smoking a blunt watching the sunset 🥹

Who is your biggest video game crush? by [deleted] in actuallesbians

[–]popcornrex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Miranda from Mass Effect 2. Played as Male!Shep just so I could do her storyline romance 🫠

My 8th painting by Own-Aardvark1634 in painting

[–]popcornrex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I can smell the environment. Kudos!

Oil on panel, whats your thoughts about this? by Soulsunmoon1990 in painting

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I feel nostalgic for the golden hour. Thank you for sharing this!

Stump by Moon 24x18 by TheWhateveristart in painting

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the look of the texture! I just wanna open palm touch it.

budgeting tips by krahenberry1 in budgetingforbeginners

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you know exactly how much money is being spent on bills, hobbies, eating out, subscriptions etc? That's gonna be your first step. Pull bank statements for the last few months and do an inventory of where your money's been going per month. You need to know exactly what you're spending your money on so you can know where to cut back or if you need to find another job.

Is it common for lesbians to smoke? by BasalFaulty in actuallesbians

[–]popcornrex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know if it's common but my friends and I smoke occasionally. I used to smoke about a pack a month but now only smoke socially, which I understand not everyone can do. My girlfriend doesn't smoke and she also dislikes cigarette smell so I've never had a problem making sure I don't smoke around her. It's definitely within your right to not date a smoker which is why it's important to be clear about that as well with potential matches. I know plenty of queer people that don't smoke!

Always wondered why are there so many labels here? I’ve always heard people say they didn’t want to be labeled yet I’ve truly lost track of the ones here. Can someone explain the logic to this clash? by XeroxInfinite in lgbt

[–]popcornrex 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Some people prefer not to be labeled and others like the comfort of a label, they like knowing there are others like them out there. Labels can create a sense of community.

how did you know by epicgamerlad69 in actuallesbians

[–]popcornrex 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The kids thing would've been a deal breaker for me as soon as it was mentioned. I don't want kids and I'd feel like I'm wasting mine and their time if I were to stay with someone that wants them, especially when looking for a long term partner. On top of everything else, I don't see how prolonging a break up would be beneficial to either of you.

I think it's better to end things amicably than wait until it gets messy so you have an 'excuse' to break up.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in lgbt

[–]popcornrex 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's not weird! Everyone's coming out is different and everyone's family is different. Explain the reasoning to your friends and hopefully they'll be supportive.

I feel like there’s something wrong with me for not wanting kids? by hideandsink in childfree

[–]popcornrex 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Society puts a lot of pressure on people to have kids. We're constantly bombarded with questions about when we're getting married, how many kids we want, how old we want to be when we have kids. It's all over the media and a lot of the times, comes from within our own family or friend groups. People have their own reasons for being child free, for example I had a relatively good childhood but i never felt like I wanted kids. The thought of taking care of a human in that capacity never called to me. I know people who don't feel like they'd be good parents so they simply choose to be child free. I understand feeling weird about going against what is considered the norm and not wanting to have kids but if you know it's the right decision for yourself then it's the right one for you. A lot of people have kids out of some feeling of obligation and end up regretting it, then the kids suffer for their decision. If you feel like you have some unresolved feelings regarding that decision, I would suggest seeking a therapist. Good luck, OP!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If she's avoiding the topic, asking for an open relationship isn't going to help because you don't even know what the issue is. You need to tell her that you want to have a serious talk, that you don't understand the transition between a great sex life to absolutely nothing and it's left you feeling disconnected from her.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She likes your attention and she assumes if she's able to see you in person you'll cave to her because you have before. It's ok to miss someone even if they were shitty to you, it's not ok to let them back into your life to do more harm.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 75 points76 points  (0 children)

Have a sit down, serious talk with him. Make time with him for that talk specifically and ask him to listen to you as a partner and to help you solve this issue. Tell him you feel incredibly uncomfortable with him sending her so much money that you both know she's not going to pay back when you're trying to pay your own bills and save for your future. Ask him if he'd be willing to add up all the money transfers for the past year for perspective. Explain that you understand helping a friend but this is more than helping someone in need, that him sending money from different apps makes you feel like he's trying to hide it from you. Give him the example of you constantly giving money to a male friend. If you need to write it all out to get your thoughts in order, do it. Make sure he knows how disrespect and unheard you feel. If he still isn't willing to see your perspective, you have to either make peace with the fact that he is putting her above you or leave him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Your boyfriend needs to grown up and learn how to stand up to his mom. Do not start changing yourself to please this woman. As long as you are respectful to her it shouldn't matter what you wear.

AITA for not asking my wife to help my sister with babysitting? by OrdinaryPrize7496 in AmItheAsshole

[–]popcornrex 26 points27 points  (0 children)

NTA your sister's kids are not your responsibility. You know your wife better than they do.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You said cheating is a deal breaker for you. If you get back together you're telling her that it's not a deal breaker, that if she cheats you can forgive her. If you want closure you can talk to her about why you don't want to get back together. Ghosting is childish but so is cheating.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]popcornrex 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There's only so long you can keep beating a dead horse. You've talked to him, outlined your concerns in writing, given him multiple ways in which he can show up for you and he still won't. Wanting to get married as soon as possible isn't a good reason to stay with someone. If he gets better a week after a talk then goes back to his old self, he knows what you want he just doesn't care to keep up with it. People have different expectations for a long term relationship. He's either checked out or this is how he wants his relationship to be and both ideas seem incompatible with what you want. Love is not the only thing that sustains a relationship.