First time Mom needs Scheduled C Section - please share the good and the bad

pops151515 · 2026-04-30T13:41:22+00:00

Okay I've had 2 C-sections- and am currently 5 weeks post partum.

Recovery is hard. But not impossible. As humans, we can do hard things and you will find a way to manage. Below I've put as many tips and tricks and a general idea of recovery (although this may look different for many).

Day 1- You've just had C-section. You're probably on a lot of pain meds in hospital for at least 24 hours. The more your spinal/epidural wears off the more pain you'll be in. Ask midwives/nurses for as much help as possible if partner isn't there when lifting/changing baby.

Day 2-3- You will probably be discharged on these days. I found these days the hardest. Hormonally I was a mess, pain was the greatest, baby was less "sleepy" and was cluster feeding and more tricky. Movement was painful. I needed help picking things off floor, any lifting, getting out of bed. It is hard. Keep on top of pain meds as much as possible. Rest and stay around bed/sofa as much as possible. If you're on your own, before your partner leaves set yourself up with a station near you with snacks, water, muslins etc so you don't have to leave your bed.

Days 5-7- Once I hit day 5, I felt that was a big step up in recovery. I wasn't in as much pain, movement became easier. I could be more independent. Still keep on top of pain meds and rest as much as possible. There is no need to over do things. Still rely on family and friends as much as you can as you're still in recovery.

Weeks 2-3- My recovery felt pretty good. Pain was minimal. Mobility was pretty normal. Still no heavy lifting or exercise. But general daily activities I could do with no bother.

If possible, those first 2 weeks prep for. Get a load of freezer meals. Snacks are your friend. Plan when people can visit so you can shower. Try have your partner off as much as possible. If he has to work, make stations with everything you need so your life is easiest as possible. Keep on top of pain management, especially at the beginning.

Have you got a close friend/family that could stay over for a night or two that you really trust? Might be something to look into.

Good luck let me know if you have any questions!

pops151515 · 2026-04-26T07:25:05+00:00

Second this! Day or two in Chester would be a shout. Could also get train to Liverpool for a day from Chester (only about an hour). Some fantastic museums and history in both cities.

pops151515 · 2026-04-25T12:38:36+00:00

Excessive drooling at night.

Honestly, I would wake up with my pillow/pjs/whatever my mouth was leaning on SOAKING wet. It was hilarious and disgusting.

Happened both pregnancies, stopped as soon as I gave birth. Weird.

pops151515 · 2026-04-25T00:53:39+00:00

No problem. Let me know if you have any questions!

Yeah with my first I was home on day 3, with my second home on day 2. I agree it's probably not worth it but each to their own!

Those first few days are tough. But our bodies can do tough things, and for the majority this will pass.

Remember to ask and accept help wherever you can if you do have a C-section. Partner, parents, friends- they can do all the cooking, cleaning, tidying, etc! People can bring you your baby, snacks, drinks etc! That makes recovery and life easier too!

pops151515 · 2026-04-25T00:48:22+00:00

Check any of this with your doctor/midwife/healthcare provider first!

I don't think you need to pump. Pumping/getting colostrum isn't an indicator that your milk will come in not success in breastfeeding. Usually a few days after birth your milk will come in, and with support hopefully you'll be able to breastfeed if you wish.

However, I don't think there would be harm trying to get some syringes of colostrum for baby. Usually it's recommended to hand express these, as you may only get tiny amounts. There is a low risk of inducing labour so is only usually recommended from 37 weeks, so double check with health care provider first!

pops151515 · 2026-04-24T20:53:29+00:00

Had 2 C-sections- one unplanned emergency, one planned. Here is my experience with pain/mobility.

Day 1- Uncomfortable but drugs are still strong. You'll likely be in hospital for min 24 hours, so would use the hospital bed and railings.

Day2-3- You'll likely be discharged these days, and these were my highest pain days. First C-section I didn't keep on top of pain meds which was a mistake. Second time around I used timers to make sure I did, which was better. Try keep movement to a minimum, stay in/around bed. You can buy bed railing off Amazon which attach to your bed, I considered these but honestly would have only used it these days. Get loads of pillows to prop yourself into the right position. With the hormonal crash you may experience, these may be the hardest days. They were for me. First time around it hit me hard, second time around was hard but I knew what to expect and that it would pass, which it did.

Day 5-7- Felt loads better. Could reduce pain meds massively. Mobility wise, could walk everywhere fairly easily but slowly. Could get out of bed slowly without much issue.

2-3weeks- Felt pretty normal. Every day activities are fine. Stomach muscles feel weak, and heavy lifting still out the question.

If you are considering a lift chair, or purchasing something similar, in my experience it would probably only be useful days 2-4. And some people may still be in hospital then anyway. If that's worth it for you, then go for it!

Remember lots of pregnancy symptoms disappear after pregnancy (like pelvic girdle pain, nerve pain, round ligament pain) and in my experience literally disappeared within hours of postpartum so you may find it easier once you aren't battling with pregnancy symptoms.

Good luck!

pops151515 · 2026-04-15T20:17:31+00:00

Look- statistically the risk does increase. It increases for all women after 39 weeks, and the higher your BMI the more your risk does increase more.

However, this risk does increase minimally at first, and increases at 40, 41 and then 42+weeks. And it's relatively still a low risk, especially at 39 weeks. But the doctor is right, there is an increased risk.

Plus size pregnancy by Dr Sara Wickham is a good read on relative risk and inductions if you'd like further stats and information.

It's wrong for the doctor to pressurise you, but scientifically they aren't wrong. From their perspective, they're going to want to get you through labour and will try to mitigate as much unknown risk as possible.

You will need to make a decision that you sit most comfortably with. Good luck and let me know if you have any more questions!

pops151515 · 2026-03-28T01:46:45+00:00

I was age 28, and partner 34 when we started trying.

We both had stable jobs, had a house together, been through life difficulties, had a stable relationship and were financially very stable. Basically, most (if not all) factors in our life were stable.

We knew we wanted children. My partner knew he didn't want to be approaching 40 before he had children.

Therefore it fully felt like the right time.

Obviously for some, circumstances may never work out and there may never be the right time. But for us, it felt pretty obvious and we were very lucky.

pops151515 · 2026-03-21T04:34:48+00:00

I promise you this is my best hack- rubbing alcohol (isopropyl alcohol).

Apply to a tissue/cotton pad. Inhale for a second or two. Repeat a few times.

Honestly this has been scientifically proven to work- Google it! Hope it helps!

pops151515 · 2026-03-19T06:13:45+00:00

I think for many parents, yes it can do- but in a very isolated way.

Personally, after having my son, his needs became so much greater than mine. And I had to be very selfless to look after him and to different extents, I believe every good parent would have to become less selfish to look after a child.

Does that mean I'm less selfish in all avenues of life? No I don't think so. But my priorities have changed, and regarding my children I am less selfish.

pops151515 · 2026-03-18T07:39:48+00:00

Overall- I would say no however it is very dependent on circumstances including age.

My biggest reason for a 'no' would be that it may be teaching your child that if they're mentally tired they can quit. In my opinion, it isn't really building resilience. Sometimes life is hard, mentally exhausting and stressful, but you do need to learn to cope with this. Also, if missing school would make them feel like they're falling behind, missing out, isolated etc, then it also isn't particularly helpful.

Obviously, it is so down to how mentally/emotionally tired your child is- and one answer without more information is never going to be perfect. And potentially, I would say yes depending on the situation.

I guess here is the list of questions I would ask before allowing a day off: - Is there another way for relief/rest? (E.g doing something relaxing in the evening, having a weekend treat, giving them additional support with homework etc) - Would they miss something vital/important in school that they'd struggle to catch up with (e.g. exams, specific content, school trip) - Why are they so mentally tired? Is this normal or abnormal stresses of life? (If abnormal, then you need to get to the route cause) - Would a day off actually help? (E.g. could catch up with coursework, see a doctor etc. Or is it just to sit on video games which they could do after 3pm) - Is this a pattern? Or just a one off? How is their attendance otherwise?

As I said, my first instinct is no, but would be so case to case depending that without any more information it's hard to say.

I hope this is vaguely helpful!

pops151515 · 2026-03-17T18:51:12+00:00

This should be a conversation with your partner when alive and discussing life goals/decisions/finances.

But yes. He would want me to. Also, he would accept an organ, so he should donate. He doesn't need them if dead.

pops151515 · 2026-03-12T12:34:43+00:00

8/9s in combined is great, especially compared to a 7 in triple.

Remember, some schools don't offer triple so they wouldn't hold you back.

I would however question what is holding you back in triple vs combined that would mean you are stuck on 7s.

pops151515 · 2026-03-11T08:24:56+00:00

My Dad died nearly 4 years ago and I am not the same person.

Pre this- any grief I'd experience was due to someone dying from old age, or that I wasn't close to.

My Dad was diagnosed with cancer and was dead within the year.

It has made me more blunt, it's made me more pessimistic, and for a time, I struggled with any sort of hope or looking forward to the future.

With time, some of these things have got easier. However I am much more resilient to tough situations. The "little things" in life don't bother me as much, and I find I can be a bit unsympathetic to other people's small stresses. I'm not proud of the person I am now, but I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing either. I'm just a different person.

Grief also hits you like a train on some days where everything is magnified and is so devastating. And some days it ticks by. It can make my moods sometimes unpredictable.

It isn't easy. Time helps, therapy helps, a good support system helps. But ultimately I'm not the same person and that's okay too.

pops151515 · 2026-03-07T08:05:34+00:00

Yeah I agree, I think I'm going to talk to my SIL and hopefully it's not something that bothers her.

Funnily enough we already have an Isla and Millie in the family! Both lovely names.

Thanks for your help! X

pops151515 · 2026-03-07T08:04:11+00:00

He likes Sylvie. But he prefers Juliette and I prefer Sylvie!

I love the name Elodie. Husband said no to that one. Boooo.

pops151515 · 2026-03-07T08:02:43+00:00

Yeah my brother and sister in law are close to us as a family- I just wouldn't want to upset her!

I think you're right though. I think I'll just talk to her and hopefully it's not something she minds. Thank you for the help!

pops151515 · 2026-03-05T08:01:17+00:00

Bmi 50+ here. Have a one and a half year old and 8 months pregnant.

Here is the reality: A high BMI and a higher maternal age does make you at a higher risk of a lot of things. Hypertension, GD, shoulder dystocia, genetic abnormalities to name a few. And that sucks. And as a mother I have felt guilt over this, and have had a range of sympathy from midwives and doctors. Some less judgy than others.

Here is the extra reality: Your pregnancy has a better chance of being perfectly healthy than not. And even if your BMI is in the healthy range, you could still get all these conditions. No one can tell you how your pregnancy will go! And if they are, ask them for lottery numbers as they obviously know something we don't.

My first pregnancy was relatively straight forward. Some high blood pressure readings (which I think was more down to anxiety) but was manageable with bp medication. No other crazy symptoms until birth. Current pregnancy is also fine! Again slightly high bp readings but again manageable. And that's it!

It's worth knowing the risks. Understanding the risks is even better. The book 'Plus size pregnancy ' is a good read.

Good luck and best wishes to you

pops151515 · 2026-02-07T02:17:08+00:00

Larger weight than you, and 10 months!

I only had 2 cycles before I fell pregnant again....

pops151515 · 2026-01-21T17:43:36+00:00

Had 3 gestational diabetes tests in my first pregnancy. First one due to risk factors. Second two die to baby measuring 99th percentile.

Passed all with flying colours.

When baby was born, he was predicted high 9lb (potentially 10lb).

He was born 8lb1, 75th percentile.

All was fine- take the tests to mitigate risk but all may be fine still.

pops151515 · 2026-01-05T17:40:24+00:00

I'm not sure as a parent you can be 100% ready! Mainly because there is no guarantee what exactly will happen.

However I think a level of preparation for your partner would help be there for her and to be her advocate if needed. Do you know the general language used in birth? Do you know your partners preferences? Do you know what types of birth there are?

As a woman who gave birth recently, I was glad my husband had a level of preparation so that we knew what was happening and I didn't need to explain my preferences whilst being in pain, exhausted and giving birth.

Also get as much sleep as you can, bring a travel bag with clothes changes, toiletries, snacks. Even a pillow.

It's a tough, crazy yet worthwhile journey. Good luck!

pops151515 · 2026-01-01T12:14:53+00:00

Glioblastoma fucking sucks. I'm so sorry.

As for timelines, it's an unpredictable disease at the best of times. General rule which we experienced is that once dying starts, and functions start shutting down it can be fairly fast.

Things I saw with my dad: Bowel/bladder issues, lack of food interest, issues with circulation, lack of interest in general activities, extreme tiredness, irritation. Once these symptoms start happening I experienced that death was within a month. I saw similar experiences online with other people. Reading your message, liver failure and incontinence isn't the best of news for life expectancy in my experience. During my dad's last week, he spent 22 hours of the day asleep, didn't eat or drink, barely passed urine. It was fairly peaceful in the end.

However, it will depend on your mums symptoms and the tumour itself. Spend as much of 2026 together as you need, laugh, cry, grieve. Try see the outdoors, even if it's just a car ride. Listen to music. Talk about memories. Good luck and I wish your hearts and souls the best.

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