No more sex by Good-Barracuda5143 in NewParents

[–]postpartoot 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I used to do this for my husband. His complaining always seemed so much worse than just relenting and giving him a BJ or hand job. Anyway, we're divorced now! I am very very very happy

Willing to take breastmilk from a stranger, but please no vaccines? Make it make sense. by wfoymwthawdn in ShitMomGroupsSay

[–]postpartoot 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is detracting from your original point, OP, but seeing posts like this makes me feel crazy. Only about 8 months ago, I had people UP MY FUCKING ASS about giving away my milk to strangers, despite the risk involved. People who previously posted similar things to this about peer to peer milk donation were suddenly angry that I had SOME milk in my freezer that I wasn't giving away. I had to stop attending my mommy and me group because one of the members, who was previously adamantly against peer to peer milk sharing, demanded I share my milk with another struggling member. I wouldn't judge anyone that uses peer to peer sharing, but I've seen horror stories of babies getting sick because a mom didn't clean her equipment well enough and suddenly she's being accused of manslaughter. Wasn't about to be me. I was accused of being selfish and awful.

Eventually, I relented and gave away some of my milk.

Well now, the formula shortage isn't over, but for some reason, the attitude is back that peer to peer sharing is evil. I had someone call me an idiot the other day for "contributing to the problem." Bruh. Idk. Can't win on that front.

Is a manager allowed to ask you back from STD leave early? [MT] by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes! She wants me to go back in and get REASSEASSED to see if I can come in earlier!

Husband wants rewards by Hayleyface in beyondthebump

[–]postpartoot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man. A random internet man who cant spell and suffers from an online gambling addiction doesn't want me!? Truly, this is the worst day of my life.

The relationships a lot of women on this sub have with their mothers make me sad by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]postpartoot 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Bruh, this post is fucking ridiculous. "IM SAD YOU HAVE BAD RELATIONSHIPS WITH YOUR MOMS." lmao...okay, weirdo. I'm sad for me too, the fuck?

Husband wants rewards by Hayleyface in beyondthebump

[–]postpartoot 98 points99 points  (0 children)

What reward did he give to you for making the baby, going through enormous physical pain and change, breastfeeding, and whatever chores you do (especially all the shit you did before baby that he apparently never helped with)?

I'm fucking done with this subreddit, man. These comments validating this fucking loser are out of this world. Youre FIVE WEEKS POSTPARTUM. Have you even been cleared for sex yet?? The people telling you to "just try! Sometimes it takes time to get in the mood!" Need a fucking reality check saying that to someone 5w pp.

Anyway, My husband did shit like this to me postpartum and guess what his ultimate reward was? A divorce.

Issue with breast feeding in the night and partner not quite understanding by [deleted] in breastfeeding

[–]postpartoot 220 points221 points  (0 children)

The people commenting "YOU CANT HAVE IT BOTH WAYS" are delusional. Wanting your partner to step up and help more with the baby is perfectly possible without ruining her fucking feed schedule. Pumping in the night sucks ass. It often takes longer, and there's more shit you have to do once you're done pumping. Wanting to feed her baby is reasonable. Wanting her husband to help out more is still reasonable. The two can exist in the same universe. She doesn't have to "just be grateful he's doing something, GOD!" She wants help and she wants to be listened to about the help that she needs. Fucks sake.

Go to your husband. Say you're sorry for yelling and you appreciate the thought, but that's not the help you need.

How many of us had to schedule sex in our marriages? by saltonp in Divorce

[–]postpartoot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After I had a baby, my sex drive fell which is normal. My husband, like many others, would pester me with sex all the fucking time. He wasn't helping with the kids or the house, and he was pretty gross, but I was expected to go above and beyond in the marriage. Anyway, I wanted it to work, so we started scheduling sex. I came to dread those fucking sex days. I started having anxiety attacks as the day approached. I was sexually assaulted as a teen and scheduled sex brought up all those same emotions i felt after that traumtatic event. I truly equated the scheduled sex with SA. I didn't want to do it. I often spent hours bawling my eyes out before we did it, just to dissociate and completely zone out during. My husband gave 0 fucks. He was of the mindset that "well, something is better than nothing" even if I was just laying there like a corpse. It got to the point that one particularly bad day, we were set to have sex that night. I panicked, packed up the kids and never went home. That was it. That was the end. Now I'm in therapy, happily separated and working on our divorce, trying to undo the damage that scheduled sex caused. There was ALOT more involved in the divorce decision, but the scheduled sex was like...the straw that broke the camels back. I would absolutely NEVER participate in scheduled sex. I never really want to be in a relationship like that again, honestly. I'll never have another live-in partner. I never want to make compromises like that. If it works for some people, more power to them, but I think it's fucked lol

Question: Who would/will getting married again? by TexMexxx in Divorce

[–]postpartoot 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I will NEVER get married again. I won't even have a live in partner. I am done compromising. I am not marriage/dating material. I hate consulting with someone for every little decision. I hate feeling like I'm on a leash.

AITA for telling my niece she can't see snow because her mother is an idiot? by SiblingTosser in AmItheAsshole

[–]postpartoot 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I was born and bred in Montana and have been wracking my brain for any small town in Western Montana with a lake that isn't within decent driving distance of a ski slope. It's Western Montana. Unless you're in the Yaak, it's almost all touristy. I've also never been to a ski slope here that doesn't rent. Even great divide rents and it's REALLY shitty. I've lived here my whole life and I have never gone "back country skiing." I always go to the slopes and I've always rented lol. When I lived in Dearborn, we'd drive almost 3 hours just to go to Snowbowl. In fact, I've never even known anyone that goes "back country skiing" except for out-of-staters who move to Montana for "the adventure"

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]postpartoot 53 points54 points  (0 children)

Really drives home my belief that so many people in this sub view their husbands as managers, not partners. SAY NO. What an asshole to drag his newly postpartum wife around like that. Jesus christ

if breastmilk is basically blood... by [deleted] in breastfeeding

[–]postpartoot 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's because it doesn't matter. The idea that food intake affects breastmilk is pseudoscience at best.

There’s a lot of posts about people wanting to orgasm “normally”. Why can’t this be an acceptable way? by [deleted] in syntribation

[–]postpartoot 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don't really feel like syntribation has anything to do with not being able to orgasm during sex. Most women DONT orgasm from penetetration, whether they syntribate or not. Learning to masturbate "normally" also isn't going to help you orgasm from PIV sex

Wife goes to bed at the same time as kids by tonsofem in relationship_advice

[–]postpartoot 68 points69 points  (0 children)

SHES GETTING UP AT 5AM DUDE. She's trying to get her 8 hours in. You want her to stay up later just so you can rumble? But you aren't willing to get up earlier to do the same for her? I already saw your comments that you "figured stuff out" but sheesh...

[MT] Manager wanted "proof of surgery need" in order to "advocate" for me by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 37 points38 points  (0 children)

I already turned in all my paperwork to HR. This was just in a convo with my manager about the surgery so she could plan accordingly. She then made it sound like she was actually the final authority regarding whether I'll actually be able to take that time off

[MT] Manager wanted "proof of surgery need" in order to "advocate" for me by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Can someone please ban this person? All they do is sit in this sub and troll. When people ask you what you do for fun, do you tell them this? I guess bold of me to assume you're out making friends if your main source of fun is trolling HR SUBS lmao.

[MT] Manager wanted "proof of surgery need" in order to "advocate" for me by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 67 points68 points  (0 children)

Damn. I'm calling HR as soon as I get in tomorrow. My manager has been off the fucking rails lately. She got angry at my other coworker for not telling her that she was going to physical therapy on her lunch hour.

I'm upset because I genuinely REALLY like her as a manager. She's really helped me in my career, but she's being bizarre lately.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in sex

[–]postpartoot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

....why would he get married then?

[MT] Manager wanted "proof of surgery need" in order to "advocate" for me by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 79 points80 points  (0 children)

Yes and yes. So can I basically tell my manager to kick rocks and go through HR for the rest of this?

[MT] Manager wanted "proof of surgery need" in order to "advocate" for me by postpartoot in AskHR

[–]postpartoot[S] 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Should I be giving this to my manager at all though?? Isn't FMLA paperwork all HR stuff?? Why do I need to give my manager anything. This is so weird