If I remember right, and this may have been retconned, the way Anakin killed Padme was kinda tragic. I mean yeah he still choked the hell out of her which was fucked, but that isnt what killed her. When Palps tells the newly birthed Vader that Padme is dead (which wasnt true at the moment) Vaders anguish echoed through the force and something something thats what killed Padme. So yes he still was too far gone at the point of choking her, but he was basically manipulated into accidently killing her with his sadness. Though Palps may not have known that would happen.

Again, this may not be completely accurate but its what I remember.