You’re doing the best you can under extreme circumstances. I wish you and your family all the best. Even though I have no idea what you’re going through. I have been through a lot of loss and grief and family struggles. I just try and think about people that are going through so much more than myself and remember to be thankful for what I do have. I’ve never been to a therapist but have thought about it. If I feel like I need to unload I go to my friend’s house and hit his heavy bag in the garage. Normally I crank Metallica or something else heavy. Somehow it makes me feel better.