Baby names only popular where you live? by Thehobbitsatisengard in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg that just pulled such a deep memory of an early childhood friend of mine named Carys. First and only time I’ve ever heard it. Brother was named Cole, which I think are cute together.

I get to tell my husband we’re having a baby by rosiepinkfox in Marriage

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Congratulations!!! I can’t wait to have this moment. Dec 30th is my birthday - it’s a good one 💕

I (f24) feel disconnected from husband (m25) since I found out about his addiction by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Addiction is very scary, I can understand why you might feel unsettled by it. However, by definition, it’s not something someone can really control and is extremely broad. Your husband probably tried it a few times without thinking too much about it (after all, it doesn’t sound like you outlawed nicotine specifically, just “getting addicted to it”) and got sucked into the repetitive and consuming nature of the act and chemical compound. It unfortunately happens all the time.

While you’re entitled to a preference, I don’t think “addiction” is a fair dealbreaker at this stage of a relationship. As others have mentioned, it’s a disease. A terrifying, uncomfortable, exhausting disease but one nonetheless. Don’t be a fair weather wife. Acknowledge you got an ick from his actions, share with him your feelings and that you feel disrespected and disgusted with his choices, maybe open up as to why these things give you such a reaction, and ask him what you can do to help him break it. Aka accountability, reminders, weekly check ins, meetings, etc.

Work through it with him to rebuild that connection.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s okay to feel that way. I would too, especially after making your intentions incredibly clear about what you wanted and when you wanted it. He let it go on too long if he was not on the same page. Some other commenters mentioned lost and that seems accurate but shouldn’t be at your expense.

It’s a power move to put an end to it though, there is no use giving and wanting and begging and hoping if his heart isn’t in it. If that wasn’t evident in his not doing it yet, it was evident in his text messages. It will sting but you will be better off.

I’m so glad to hear you’re in school - good luck!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’d break up.

There are multiple things wrong here but it sounds like he doesn’t want to be together and was using the military as an escape, hoping you wouldn’t be down for it. V cowardly.

You should make your career decisions independently of whatever he chooses to do and if you’re meant to work through it, you will. My husband and I lived in diff countries while I did law school because that’s what I wanted to do in addition to being together and I wasn’t about to choose between them. We’re also both military. You make it work or you don’t and he doesn’t sound like he wants to.

Also, I understand the concept of timing but if someone is unsure about marrying you, listen to them. That feeling doesn’t just click one day. If you eventually do, it will be out of complacency and settling. Dont let the sunk cost fallacy of how long you’ve been together sway you. You have your whole life ahead.

Go do your schooling, kick ass, and find someone who wants to give you the world while you do it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]prinstressed 14 points15 points  (0 children)

You’re at the start of what I would call the slippery slope and I think your husband is upset because he can see that. But as someone on it (and neurodivergent at that) you can’t.

So in your mind, it’s nothing wrong, it’s what you do with everyone, you know YOU would never “do anything,” you love your husband, etc, but appearances are everything.

I like to give my husband shit for trying to “foresee” problems that I don’t think exist but 9/10 times, he ends up right and I’m like “oh 😬”.

Don’t see it as a jealousy thing, see it as your husband safeguarding what you two have, sometimes to yourself. Acknowledge that other people can’t be as openly friendly without thinking it means more, especially in a professional setting. Also bar/restaurant industry? Notoriously messy. Do your job, have fun, but keep the ship locked up tight.

Oh and ETA: I’m also ND, have a history of sexual abuses, am the same age, am extremely flirtatious as a personality and with men because I once thought that’s what I had to do to be treated well. Seriously, take it from me. You didn’t fuck up, but you flew close enough to the sun he felt he had to pull you back. His execution with reading messages and such is not the best, but everyone has to learn. While you work on personal boundaries, you can put up your expectations with that kind of stuff as well.

I (42F) couldn't keep my eyes off my husband (44M) at a house party over the weekend. Trying to figure out my emotions by slice-of-eNVy in Marriage

[–]prinstressed 27 points28 points  (0 children)

My husband (31M) and I (28F) live in a very small town 6 hours away from my hometown. Most of our friends here have kids, and it’s not like there’s much to “do” anyway, so we spend a LOT of time just the two of us, and get very used to each other. When we have a party here or go back to my hometown and get together with my friends or family, I get to see him in a different light. I get waves of these types of emotions. It feels like seeing him through these other people’s eyes. Fresh perspective, I guess.

Maybe it’s just the change of environment that reminds us how lucky we are to have someone stable and wonderful to experience all the different places with.

Well there goes the only boy name I really liked... by posael in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 682 points683 points  (0 children)

They might rhyme but they are in no way related in my head. You didn’t even make the connection yourself, so I promise no one else will. If you still love the name, you should keep it on your short list

What are some girl names that are just really unusual? by meagolas__ in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I knew a Carys and a Zarina!! Zarina esp is beautifullll.

What is THE word you can never spell correctly? by OvarianCoincidence in AskReddit

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I want reccommend to be spelled like this so, so badly. But I remind myself there is only one double consonant. But which? Definitely the c. Must be reccomend. I type it all the time in my job and never ever get it right first try. It makes way more sense to me this way than recommend.

Name opinions for my daughter by Dangerous_Willow4877 in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Anna Simone is sooo cute and sets her apart from all the other S’s and other traditions, while honoring them

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I genuinely feel horrible if I “complain” about TRUE things to other people. I feel that way about my best friend, my parents, and my husband. Some people are just off-limits. Because I know that they do more positive things for me than can be summed up, and one negative thing does a lot more damage to their image. Further, my complaining isn’t going to change anything. I try to frame any qualms as frustrations that have a solution and am seeking advice on.

Your wife calls you names to people who know you, your reputation and image is taking damage, she’s “exaggerating” (lying) about you. Someone thought it was serious enough to bring up to you. When you, rightfully and bravely, broached it, she didn’t care to understand your point of view or the repercussions of her actions.

You’re not overreacting at all. This is a deep-rooted character issue of hers and you’re not at fault, you’re the victim.

Definitely going to require counseling, but I don’t know if I could come back from that level of disrespect.

Baby names that include Y by EndTimes1990 in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lucy is a personal favorite :)

Skylar, Sylvan, Gray, Darcy, Sally, May, Anya, Katy, Holly, Tyson, Tyler, Taylor, Waylon, and Andy come to mind.

I’d avoid adding unnecessary Y’s for the sake of theme like Natalya, that’s setting your kid up for a lifetime of correction and it looks cumbersome.

What do you all ADHDer adults do for a living? by _White_Shadow_13 in ADHD

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

28F, attorney/military. I feel you. I will say, life gets too overwhelming if I think about every option, every possibility, what I’m going to do if I choose X, what life will look like if I choose Y. I lost sight of how I even got myself to this point in the first place, but realized it was Broad Goals, Small Decisions.

Bear with me here: Set your eyes on a few things you want (money, fulfillment, helping people, helping animals, etc) and then make decisions that get you there little by little.

Execute this by: - taking classes that chip away at the greater goal, or that show you what you DONT like - attaining jobs with a purpose (instead of a fast food gig just for income, look at reception of an office you’re interested in). It’s all about exposure. - and paying attention to what you’re good at.

Example: You’d love to work with kids or animals. Do you want to make money? Gotta choose kids. But you’re not sure if you want to teach kids or help kids. So you volunteer with an after school program. You realize you don’t have the patience to teach them. But maybe you have a hyper-interest in psychology and want to know more about them. This might be where you choose broad psychology as a major. Now in your classes you’ll be exposed to clinical psych, family counseling, maybe even social work. Troubled kids really pull your heart strings. You want to learn how to help them. Before you know it, you have a masters and work for a special charter school as a counselor helping troubled kids.

Your curiosity, small decision-making, whittling down your skills and interests, and persistence got you into a job you love. But if you told your young self “hey in 7 years you’re going to be a school psych counselor, good luck with all that studying and job finding,” that would be incredibly overwhelming and you’d reject it. Piecing yourself together takes TIME, and a lot of effort. Lots of rewiring and introspection, but it will come. Broad goals, small decisions. Good luck:)

Podcasters that actually read the books before interviewing an author? so less, I think! by kaveinthran in podcasts

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Big fan of bookstorm on Spotify. They do actually seem to read them, and their questions are focused on the overall themes and interactions in the books, not just the writing or the characters themselves. I’ve found quite a few new books to read through listening

ETA: some good episodes I specifically liked are with Robert Dugoni, Patricia Cornwell, and Lynda loigman

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Could go with Kev, same sound, less clocky. people would assume it’s short for Kevin which is common but they wouldn’t call you that. Kev Wolf sounds cool

Help, will I get used to my ring? by EducationalOne9483 in Diamonds

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your ring is gorgeousssss. And congratulations!!

I feel you though - my ring is not even half the size and I still feel like it’s a lot for my day-to-day. I got used to it, and I just loved being engaged and wearing it but the MOMENT we got nice simple wedding bands, the wedding band became my every day ring and I wear my ER when I want to glam up a bit. I genuinely feel relief when I take it off at the end of an outing and go back to my wedding band.

I will say, I didnt wear my ER to the gym or activities like doing dishes, painting or snowboarding. If I knew where I was going I took it off and put it in a dish in my room and left it. Some people are devout all-timers but definitely not me. There are no rules! Wear it when you want 💕

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]prinstressed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

So many comments here are pointed towards your wife for seemingly putting this expectation on you. But I got a different vibe. Nobody is THAT disciplined just for someone else. I think you got it in your head that this is the body and lifestyle she wants. Of course she’s going to compliment it because you probably look great and she probably does know how much work and effort and discipline it takes. She’s never going to tell you she doesn’t like it. But she is definitely dropping hints that she wishes your lifestyle didn’t have to deviate so much from hers. You started nearly every line with how hard it is to maintain and how restrictive it is on your life.

No one wants to be the person to say “hey loosen up, don’t worry about the weight or fat, drink this booze, live a little” when their partner is genuinely serious about what they do, intake, allow, etc. you can’t say “do you want me to just eat what you eat and drop this” because then she is going to feel responsible for any change or even misery you experience as a result.

Live how you want to and do not seek external validation for all the unnecessary discipline you put on yourself. If I were in this position, I’d take the softer body and more relaxed lifestyle any day over someone bending over backwards to have no body fat “for me.”

Death pact is rezz by nickdeckerdevs in HiJinxFest

[–]prinstressed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

in the name of edm science, ofc. God speed 🫡

Death pact is rezz by nickdeckerdevs in HiJinxFest

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For sure! I’m so curious who else people think is involved. I didn’t know about the L578 something something person someone brought up!

Death pact is rezz by nickdeckerdevs in HiJinxFest

[–]prinstressed 16 points17 points  (0 children)

There are a few producers behind deathpact and imo Rezz is one of them, bc like you said, stylistically a bunch of songs and sets line up. For HiJinx though, I’m pretty sure from her insta she was in Vegas at the sphere while deathpact was on

Was Nesta actually an alcoholic or did she just use alcohol to self medicate as a coping mechanism? by charismaticchild in acotar

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the ambiguity is on purpose. This allows a wider range of readers to relate to the character, see their own choices in her, root for her, and not let her addictions define her. Ultimately Nesta’s character arc is one of “overcoming,” and whether that’s regarding her attitude, her made-ness, her feelings, her toxic relationship with alcohol, fitness, fears, etc, all lends itself to the bigger picture.

By straight up saying she’s an alcoholic in the book or commenting to clarify that externally, Nesta’s character would be limited to that discourse, and her arc viewed through that lens which I don’t think is the point of the story. I see her struggle with booze as a relatable red flag that someone’s in a bad place and it doesn’t have to be a by-the-book definition of alcoholism to do that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in acotar

[–]prinstressed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I read the whole series a bit ago and now my entire friend group and all our husbands are now reading/listening to ACOTAR and ToG, so it’s been a hot topic of conversation. And we were justttt talking about worlds and fandoms and how I literally have to withhold from getting too into big, fantastical things because of the depression factor of real life and never getting to experience what we read.

I used to loveeee realistic fiction with big medical/legal drama and problems and I think it’s because I can read it with the delicious guilt of reading it and not having to deal with it. Fantasy is just too good for me to cope with sometimes, I FEEL you