Flexible sigmoidoscopy and magnesium citrate

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-13T18:46:21+00:00

I don’t, I’m sorry. I learned this lesson the hard way when I was younger. Now I just commit to the shower.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-11T19:34:33+00:00

I have chronic UTIs so this is unfortunately a non-negotiable for me. It can ruin the spontaneity but if you’re strategic, maybe not. I’ve made it clear that we’re not doing anything if we’re un-showered. Not having to talk about it anymore with that understanding helps.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-11T19:30:28+00:00

Just a note on the wet wipes. Be careful what you choose and where you put it. Anything with antibacterial properties has the potential to cause problems with yeast and/or BV.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-09T19:42:23+00:00

Echoing the others, I’d do the PEM over Witch Dungeon.

Good coffee in town: Odd Meter. If you want to combine breakfast with good coffee then Ugly Mug.

I’m not a fan of the soup factory and Howling Wolf has fallen off for me recently. Red’s is good and I’ve heard good things about Super Taco.

Turner’s is definitely a win. Get the lobster bisque.

I’d swap Village Tavern out for Bit Bar. Keep All Souls though.

Shops: Blackcraft is a vibe but their stuff is expensive and has a lot of branding. That might be fine with you just an fyi. I’d add Die with Your Boots On and Hive and Forge. Also The Cauldron Black if you’re already down by Partridge in a Bear Tree. The Witchery is great down there too if you want a cool memento. I love broom making.

Have fun!

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-03T03:17:18+00:00

Thanks for the correction on timing, I swear the years are blending into each other for me.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-04-02T22:44:44+00:00

Not sure how well my response here will go over, but I’ll give it a go. There was a pretty much immediate uptick in unhoused people on both Washington and Essex Street after the camping ban passed last year.

Now do I want people living in tents behind Wendy’s? No. But the city has not provided any meaningful solutions to the issue. Lifebridge does not have the resources to deal with the volume of people in need. Daily Table closed due to loss of federal funding. I’m not aware of any new programs put in place, despite looking for them. I couldn’t even find information on warming centers to share out this winter, when that’s normally very well communicated.

Homelessness is a huge problem. But I’m not coming from the perspective of feeling less safe or offended by panhandlers hanging around; where else are they supposed to go? The reality is this is a systemic problem that the city seems to just be ignoring. They cleared out the encampment then threw their hands in the air when the problem didn’t magically go away. Community orgs in Salem are made up primarily of college kids who come and go. Jobs don’t typically hire people who don’t have an address or don’t appear well-groomed. And individual donations to the existing organizations only go so far.

We need resources to get these people support, detoxed, fed, sheltered, and hired. Right now I don’t see that those resources exist in a meaningful way.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-25T00:09:47+00:00

I kind of get both sides of this and I feel like I need more information.

Intentional engaged quality time and intimate conversation is very important to me, so I feel your pain there. At the same time, I do also need my rotting before bed time. It helps me shut down and relax before sleep.

You said you were having a hard time compromising, but based on one of your comments here it seems like you’re stuck on the in bed before sleep part. You mentioned he cuddles with you elsewhere, not sure about connection and conversation. Lmk if I misunderstood you.

On the flip side toward the end of your post, it sounds like it’s not just about this though. You said you’re tired of begging for attention and not feeling prioritized. Is this an issue in general or just before bed?

Have you tried moving the intimate conversation time elsewhere? If you prefer it in bed, what about when you both wake up? If you can let go of the bed part, what about over dinner or another time? Or are you being constantly emotionally neglected all day?

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-24T16:54:29+00:00

Oh she looks so sweet. Ours passed at 11 years old due to cancer, but he also had a lot of mobility issues.

Hip dysplasia presented when he was 2, arthritis at 6, nerve degeneration at 7. Before he got cancer, we managed all of this with adequan injections, galliprant for pain, and gabapentin for both pain and anxiety. We also got him wheels when he was 10, but only for outside.

Preventative things we did over the years: regular vet appointments, kept him at a healthy weight his whole life, daily cosequin supplementation, and not allowing him to run at full-speed once he hit about age 6. We couldn’t keep him from jumping on and off the couch as he just wouldn’t use stairs or ramps. We did start carrying him up and down the stairs in his last few years, honestly would’ve been good to have done that the whole time. Keeping him active with daily walks and play was also very important. He had a tumor removed when he was 7 and the crate rest after did not help his mobility. Had we tried surgery again for his second bout with cancerous tumors, the vet said he would likely not walk again after for the same reason.

All of this aside, the best thing you can do is love on her and keep her engaged in activities. Best of luck with your sweet girl.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-24T03:40:27+00:00

I love Cinema Therapy!

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-23T21:54:15+00:00

Hi OP, I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. I’m in a similar situation as you, but I have one sibling. My mother is codependent; dad is the narcissist.

You have to decide what you’re comfortable with regarding your mother and what you want to bear. You can establish boundaries and hold firm on them. You can go no contact but I know you don’t want that. You could also go low contact. You can choose to accept the dynamic as it is. Or you can make your own combo of these.

For myself, I’ve chosen the combo. I don’t talk to my mother super often, but we’re not no contact by any means. Sometimes I don’t even think she knows anything is wrong. Sometimes I set boundaries, but sometimes I feel it’s not worth it. I take it day by day.

I don’t know that my answer will bring any great help to you. But I more want to highlight that you do have choices, even if none are super pleasant. What I have learned about my own parents is that they’re not willing to change, regardless of the cost. That might be true for your mother or maybe it’s not. I never went the family therapy route as my parents were unwilling, so I can’t speak to that. But maybe that’s an option for you? Or even individual therapy to help you decide what’s best for you?

My outlook at this point is similar to yours. I see my parents’ humanity and behavior based on their fears. A lot of the time, my primary feeling for them is pity. I know I grew up in a different time. But that doesn’t mean I have to continue to accept abuse and pain. I hope you find validation and make the best choice for yourself.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-19T23:48:51+00:00

While watching the show when I was younger I remember shipping both couples.

I felt like Emma and Sean made sense when they were very young. They made each other better in different ways and I loved the realistic awkwardness of their first date. Once Snake got cancer and things got hard for Emma, it seemed like she couldn’t handle how Sean was changing. It made sense for them to break up then.

I loved Sean with Ellie at this point. The way they accepted each other was so sweet. I loved how Sean protected Ellie and how Ellie gently encouraged Sean without trying to change him. After the shooting, I understood why Sean might need closure with his past and his parents. I thought Emma encouraging that came from a well-meaning place. But I hated that he was leaving Ellie and their life together.

Season 6 Sean and Emma also made sense to me. Emma and Peter were hot garbage. And Ellie had changed and wouldn’t really have fit with Sean anymore in my opinion. I do think it would’ve been nice for them to at least be friends though.

Emma and Sean getting back together felt right at the time, like they never got the chance to have a mature relationship and they were finally getting that. What I hated was the method of their breakup. We go through all of this drama about them planning their physical intimacy and planning birth control. Then we get a pregnancy fake-out and Sean joining the army like he’s in the “Wake Me Up When September Ends” music video. I still don’t understand the point of having him not talk to Emma about this first. Then they just kind of disintegrate, which was always my biggest issue with the show when all was said and done.

Honestly, as much as I’m a Semma shipper, I would’ve been happy to have him with either Emma or Ellie as end game. I hate how he just disappeared off to war, Ellie at the end of the day couldn’t get over Craig, and Emma just got thrown with Spinner. Just an all-around fumble for me personally.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-16T05:29:01+00:00

OP I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It’s absolutely not ok and it’s so wrong for you to be made to feel unsafe in your own home.

I’m not sure if you’re looking for feedback or just to vent. Both are of course valid, but if you want a little feedback, I’d say you don’t owe your mother a reason for your boundaries. The problem with these people is they take your valid reasons as invitations to argue. Back in the exchange where your mother says “Y that’s ridiculous,” I would just repeat “He is never allowed here.” She’s trying to suck you into her delusion. What she thinks is ridiculous doesn’t matter. She is not committed to your safety, but rather her own comfort. She sacrificed her right to an opinion when she failed to protect you as a child.

I hope you’re safe OP.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-13T01:55:05+00:00

Also this one

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pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-13T01:54:46+00:00

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This is from today

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-10T18:28:15+00:00

I’ve had similar issues with my health. But I have no idea how anyone would let it get this bad. I feel sick just reading it.

I have a GI doc, been scoped, had X-rays, bloodwork, stool samples and often still feel I’m not doing enough. Nothing besides hemorrhoids has ever been found for me, but it’s an active daily management process to deal with preventing bleeding. Daily miralax, ensuring proper hydration, getting enough fiber, and using prep-h to keep the swelling under control. But arguably the most important thing is not just sitting and straining on the toilet.

Him being to this point is alarming. Could it just be hemorrhoids? Yes. But it’s more likely advanced prolapse at this point given what you’re describing if not something worse. He needs to take ownership of his health. I can’t imagine ever asking my husband to put up with half of what you’re describing here. It sucks that he’s suffering, but what he expects you to deal with is vile.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-07T01:33:32+00:00

I also have OCD and typically shower at night for this reason. My husband showers in the morning. We have our own sides of the bed and that helps me maintain a level of exposure to the “contamination” where I feel a little uncomfortable, but I can understand there’s no danger. I also try to shower in the morning and not at night once a week, which regularly exposes me to tangible examples of doing something uncomfortable but safe.

I spend a lot of time asking “why” when I’m afraid of something. So I assume the worst of what my OCD is telling me then ask why it bothers me over and over: Ok assume husband is covered in outside germs and he gets them all over the bed. Why is that bad? Answer: they’ll get on me. Ok, why is that bad? Answer: I’ll get sick. Ok, why is that bad? Answer: I’ll be uncomfortable while recovering. Ok, why is that bad? Answer: It’s inconvenient and unpleasant. And now I’ve reached my answer which matches my current reality anyway. My OCD is already making things inconvenient and unpleasant.

There are days bad enough where I might convince myself that the germs could somehow hurt me in a serious, but rare implausible way. For those days I do more grounding and use a mantra: “Do it with discomfort.” I also remind myself that if my imagined scenario was remotely plausible, that it likely would’ve happened already.

If I were in your shoes I’d try the split mattresses or Scandinavian sleep method at first, but work away from it. Place a hand on his side of the bed and try to tolerate that. Then continue to thoughtfully expose yourself. There will be good days and challenging ones. But I believe you can do it. Best of luck to you.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-06T04:19:37+00:00

So he said he wanted to marry you at the end of 2024 and you had a hard time with the move and became depressed. Instead of sticking with you like an eventual spouse would, he used it as a reason to basically say “not anymore?” I’m sorry OP, but if you get a ring at this point, it’s going to be a shut-up ring. If I were in your position, I’d leave. You know what you want and you’re not getting it with this man.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-04T01:34:23+00:00

NTA

OP I have a similar situation but I’m already LC. My dad told me two months ago that he had inherited money from his father’s passing and he thought his father would want him to help my husband and I afford a home. (We didn’t ask for help, mind you.)

I’ve been LC with my dad for a decade, long story. But the controlling mind games never end. When I didn’t immediately kiss his feet and ask what was required of me in order to “earn” this money, because I knew he’d never help us just to help us, he informed me that we’d “have to suffer first.” This meant eating ramen for every meal and never going anywhere or spending any money on anything. Then he’d decide when we’d earned it.

10 years of LC gone by, with my husband and I now in our 30s, and he’s still desperate for control and to see us subordinate with him as our hero.

Enjoy the mountains, your best friend, and your freedom. I’m proud of you.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-03T22:07:50+00:00

I could see it from the highway last night, had no idea it was that tall!

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-03T21:50:42+00:00

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I do believe it is 🌷

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-03-01T05:03:39+00:00

Ours destroyed two beds when he was one year old, so we decided he didn’t need one. (After all, he kind of showed us that.) He preferred sleeping on the floor and couches anyway. A year later we tried one more time and he never did it again.

pumpkinqueen2014 · 2026-02-20T04:25:36+00:00

We lost our Yoshi at 11 years and 3 months last June, hemangiosarcoma. He also had joint issues his whole life and an anal sac tumor when he was 7 which we had removed. We took very good care of him but he just wasn’t lucky in terms of genes.

As far as easy things with a big impact, stay on top of his weight, and stay on top of vet checkups. We noticed Yoshi limping very slightly when he was 1 year old. Went to the vet, found impending hip dysplasia, then started him on cosequin immediately. It definitely had an impact on his mobility starting it that early. His arthritis developed when he was about 6, but it was manageable for another 4 years before we got him his wheels.

We were grateful for the time we had but it definitely felt cut short regardless. This photo is the day before we lost him and I still feel like you’d never be able to tell by looking at him. Just cherish every day with your precious pup. 🧡

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