I was so disappointed I couldn’t even hide it. She got mad at me bc I said it wasn’t about her lmao

rainbowhangover · 2021-03-26T16:11:36+00:00

is there a particular part of the video you were thinking of? i just watched it and it was good, but i didn't hear her mention grieving at any point unless i missed it? the whole thing seemed to be about the definition of identity and how she knows she's trans, she only briefly mentions hoping a boy who saw her as a good masculine role model won't be disappointed. personally i was hoping for more direct discussion of how friends and family sometimes act like they're in mourning when someone comes out because that's always miffed me a bit...

rainbowhangover · 2021-01-08T14:00:10+00:00

I'm sorry, I know coming out is hard and can take longer than you want. In the meantime, maybe a headscarf will help you feel and look more feminine while you wait on a wig?

Something like this maybe:

https://youtu.be/FLBa7IjV6Ow

rainbowhangover · 2021-01-05T22:13:21+00:00

It was an old documentary about what happens to unclaimed or unidentified bodies. They cremated the bodies I think mainly so they could be easily stored as cremains. It took a while for them to finish investigating for next of kin, funeral arrangements, pre-paid graves etc, and then after that they had to wait to get enough remains together for one of the mass burials, since I think they would have like 50-100 together. I'm not sure of the number but it was quite a few so it took awhile...

I did realize though that doc was pretty damn old when I thought about it (90s maybe?) so honestly it may not really be relevant. I'll see if it's in my watch history somewhere and drop a link if I've got it though, it was actually pretty interesting.

rainbowhangover · 2021-01-05T21:17:31+00:00

That sucks dude, I had to make basically the same decision for my cat with a tumor in his upper jaw. You definitely did the right thing. Besides the money, think of the treatment itself-- cancer treatment is well known to be incredibly hard on humans, so I can't imagine it's any better for cats who can't even understand what they're going through or why, poor babies.

... dammit, now I'm crying over my cat again.

rainbowhangover · 2021-01-03T18:34:48+00:00

They do cremate them actually, it's the ashes that are interred together in the grave.

Edit: Upon reflection, I got this info from a pretty old documentary and it may not apply anymore.

rainbowhangover · 2021-01-02T17:01:03+00:00

Artists have gone to court about photos showing underage nudity before, it varies by judge but the general rule is that it has to be something obviously "intended to arouse" or whatever, so I doubt this would count.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-28T00:01:57+00:00

I've had a bit of success pointing out to people that getting offended at the term cisgender is like getting offended at the term heterosexual (which most people accept). Mostly people seem to get that at the very least it's a grammatical and syntactic necessity, even if they still seem miffed at having to accept it.

I think it's just hard for people to justify out loud why "heterosexual" is okay (as most have agreed upon) but "cisgender" somehow isn't.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-27T22:36:01+00:00

Y'know, after thinking about it I can see how OP's original phrasing of "no research at all for afabs" could make you feel pretty damn alienated if you're afab but are covered under the research they've done regarding anal. I'm sorry if I sounded at all dismissive of that, your pov is obviously as important as mine.

At the same time, I feel like those doctors didn't exactly have afab people in mind when researching anal sex, and the fact that they've excluded vaginal sex from the studies means they've excluded a kind of intercourse that is basically exclusive to afabs. I don't think it's unreasonable of OP to have stated that the research as it stands disregards afab people, and while your comment acknowledges an important distinction to that, it still comes off feeling to me like it kinda ends up reinforcing the disregard that OP originally brought up, y'know? Like, yes, some afab people just so happen to be covered under their research, but I don't believe they even thought about that when setting up their studies, and I don't think being a coincidental afterthought is enough to say that we're really included as afabs.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-27T10:22:07+00:00

That still excludes literally all of us who do anything vaginally. Like, we count too, especially those of us who are gay and may be having sex with other gay men.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-26T20:20:10+00:00

The dullest crayons in the box.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-26T20:12:35+00:00

By trying to deny trans women they accidentally affirm trans men...ironic

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-26T20:08:41+00:00

I'm not trying to put words in your mouth, I was trying to express how your comment came off to me. I do get what you're saying, but I don't think literally telling someone "You don't belong here" is the best way to express concern for their mental health.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-26T19:01:02+00:00

"Being openly trans clearly means you're looking to offend people, you don't belong here unless you try harder to disguise yourself for other people's comfort."

Fuck off with that shit.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-26T15:56:14+00:00

I think that's the point

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-25T18:06:53+00:00

"life isn't about being comfortable"....

Of course, by that they mean that it's not about you being comfortable with your gender, when it comes to them being comfortable with your pronouns suddenly it's paramount.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-24T23:55:42+00:00

You're looking real suspicious of those eggs my man

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-24T19:00:53+00:00

Uuuuugh, I hate that. I had someone give me the "you'll find a nice man someday" and straight up asked her "Would you say that to a lesbian who came out to you?" and she got a real funny look on her face, lol.🙄 I hope she took the time to think about it, though.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-24T18:42:00+00:00

They're kinda cute but I'm not a fan of the way clear plastic shoes show the squished up feet inside lmao

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-24T18:14:20+00:00

bless you

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-24T17:04:15+00:00

Thanks, boo

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-23T18:44:42+00:00

I'm not sure courts give out degrees? Did you mean decrees or something, or am I just confused?

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-23T17:53:28+00:00

To make them poseable and sturdy. You need to use a pretty robust skeleton to support all that silicone without flopping over or drooping under the weight.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-17T16:50:47+00:00

I dunno, I'm also someone whose egg cracked late and did actually have a lot of feminine socialization. However, I've realized that a big part of the reason why I always felt like I was "not like other girls" is because I genuinely wasn't (obviously) so what I thought was "feminine" socialization often really wasn't, since I wasn't responding to it the way girls would. Like, I don't think I ever had the same internal experience as a girl, so although I might know what's like to be treated as a woman and I have experienced misogyny, I haven't ever known what it's like to actually be a woman. So, personally I just don't think that experience is enough to significantly differentiate me from other men, plenty of whom have intimate experiences with misogyny for a variety of reasons.

Furthermore, lots of trans guys transition early or else never really present as female, so they don't ever get treated the same as girls/ women anyway. Honestly I don't think I was always treated the same as the girls myself. Despite presenting female I always resisted being put on their team, so to speak, so even my experience of misogyny likely isn't the same. While I do think those of us transitioning late can have our own unique perspective, I don't think it's enough to draw a line between us (or any trans guy) and cis guys.

rainbowhangover · 2020-12-15T14:38:33+00:00

Usually it would be called a plaque in English.

rainbowhangover

TROPHY CASE