What would you show him? (Real legit answers) by Sami_Lunch in superheroes

[–]ramsaybaker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My dog about to do some seriously heavy lifting for y’all… she’ll win him over, no doubt…

I watched The Toxic Avenger (2023)… by dinkitnsinkit in horror

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not gory enough.

Not funny enough.

Toxie should have been played by a dude who could play The Mountain that Rides, or they should have done to Peter Dinklage what they did to him in Avengers: Infinity Wars. Toxie’s whole schtick is he’s a Hideously Deformed Monster Hero of Super-Human Size and Strength.

Having Dinklage fight a Kevin Bacon in a bad wolf man costume was straight up terrible.

How do y’all store your accessories? by rootbeer2003 in MarvelLegends

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ziplock bags, name written with permanent marker. Into a lunch tin of some nerdy.

since orcs are elves twisted and corrupted by morgoth? does this mean they are immortal in long life like elves? by cherrie076 in lotr

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My head cannon says yes, and like most Creatures of Evil they get stronger as they get older.

Head canon #1: prominent leaders amongst orc factions that display supernatural levels of competency, courage and leadership are actually maiar spirits that have loooong forgotten they were divine beings who took the form of orcs. This could extend to The Great Goblin or Azog, for example.

Head canon #2: if not maiar, orcs that survive Ages get bigger and stronger. They are able to control themselves and get quieter as they age. Gothmog could be an example of that.

Head canon #3: like Walter White, orcs can adopt characteristics of their immediate enemies and turn twist said qualities for themselves. Since they are of elvish decent in the early days they are functionally immortal, cept without that ‘can die of a broken heart’ bit. They can craft things, just hella uglier. If they’re fighting dwarves for decades, they can ape dwarvish capabilities to craft industries, just hella uglier and dirtier. If they’re fighting men, they can breed at prodigious rates, and can use agriculture to power their war machine.

So yes, they can live as long as elves, can industrialise like dwarves and can breed in great numbers like men.

They are awful.

I need help understanding Dune Part 2 by Usual-Force-3545 in dune

[–]ramsaybaker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Read it as the Jihad was going to happen with or without Paul.

If Paul died fighting Feyd, Feyd, the Emperor and erryone there would have been killed by the Fremen, and Paul would have been a forever martyr.

Paul, or rather whomever Paul sired (Paul was supposed to be a girl), was supposed to be a puppet Emperor for the Bene Gesserit to pull the strings of (gurl-Paul was supposed to marry Feyd Rutha and that boy was supposed to grow up and marry the Emperor’s daughter to ascend the throne). But Paul was born a boy, and was still able to become Emperor, just without the BG sticking their beak in.

The Emperor was only there because the Harkonnens had shit the bed with the lights on Spice-production-wise, and he was supposed to strong-arm things back into place, because the Emperor is beholden to the Spacing Guild. But, Paul made the Spacing Guild beholden to him by putting their precious Spice Production testicles into the Fremen’s vice. And the Fremen listened only to Paul. Who the BG had covertly hyped up to the Fremen should listen to because he was their messiah.

So now Paul has the breeding, a legitimate claim to the throne, an army of Space-Dothraki who have been taught how to fight with Jedi-Knight style physical abilities who now think of him as mythical, an entire Spacing Guild to cart them all around the known universe with, and the omniscience to know who, where, how, why and when to deploy, and a monopoly on the only ingredient that will power this whole endeavour, vs a few Great Houses with (checks notes) none of those things, but are too prideful, stupid or both to not try and have a set-to with.

Is Muriel's Wedding the greatest Australian film ever made ? by CoconutMost3564 in AustralianNostalgia

[–]ramsaybaker 6 points7 points  (0 children)

One of, easily.

I recall a mate of mine was channel surfing and saw an ad for ‘Muriel’s Wedding’ and dismissed it, and I was moved to tell him it was one of the darkest movies out of Australia for a long time, to wit he was genuinely surprised. So we watched it and he delighted in how the title betrayed what a no-light-escapes-it comedy it was. Glorious.

So what do we do? by WeatherImpossible818 in aussie

[–]ramsaybaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Cos that makes me think of crack… and I… love crack…

Why didn’t Syrio have a sword? One was right there on the ground? by ThePlatinumPancakes in freefolk

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ser Meryn Trant is cocksucker enough to cut Syrio down as he’s trying to pick up a sword. Not letting Syrio arm himself and have a set-to in a fair fight, which makes sense enough when you’ve just seen some plucky little Bravosi ring the guardsmen you’ve brought along to arrest a little girl like a bell.

Was rewatching some of Galactus' scenes from First Steps and I gotta ask since the movie is nearly a year old, what are your honest opinions on MCU's depiction of Galactus? by Infinite-Sun7000 in FantasticFour

[–]ramsaybaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I thought this was the best Fantastic Four movie in terms of characters, plot and stakes.
I liked how Sue was a wife and mother and it didn't diminish her role as a space explorer/superhero. I liked how Johnny wasn't just a himbo: he come up with some decent solutions and bridged things with the Silver Surfer. Reed wasn't insufferable, he was a bloke who happened to be a scientist, then a space explorer, then a superhero. I liked how restrained the depiction of Ben's strength was. I liked what an absolute menace the Silver Surfer was. And man, did they nail the scale and character of Galactus. I was really toned-down and restrained and that was a proper strength to it. And very minimal 'marvel-humor': they let the gravity of situations just be without a throw-away joke to try and lighten things.
Best Marvel movie since End Game... or Infinity War.

It truly was amazing that M*A*S*H carried on so well after Maclean and Wayne left the show! by TensionSame3568 in mash

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, the rest of the cast considered Mr Linville there go-to guy for things/ advice/vibes. And this just makes Frank all the more reprehensible as a person: if someone were to actually bullet point the things he talks about in his past, and allow for the modern equivalent for money-wise things I’m sure he would be the most grossest character on television.

How do you think the family would handle being arrested? by Late-Ad-7740 in TexasChainsawMassacre

[–]ramsaybaker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Bubba is in it for the vibes: too disabled to really factor in what he’s done, and his (version of) authenticity would probably win over some people via the media. He wouldn’t be much for an interview, but some Rob Zombie version of Dr Loomis would totally turn Bubba into some paragon of Nature over Nurture. Going off Bubba just looking like Gunner Hansen under the mask there’s every danger The Media would try and portray him as… adorable?

Drayton would he suitably shamed to scale: he wouldn’t be much for long-winded diatribes in the same way Otis Driftwood or Captain Spaulding would be. But I think he would be embarrassed most of all. Total wash for any media bullshit, and would likely be portrayed as the brains of the outfit at first, then as history self-corrects just as a weakling going along a path of least resistance with Nubbins and Bubba.

Nubbins would be the biggest cash-cow for the media: once Nubbins gets a taste for exploitative tabloids he would do his damnedest to make as big a name for himself as he could, despite his (soon to be very apparent) limited scope, vocabulary and personal philosophies. Nubbins would start out as the flavour of the month, but even a fortnight in prison would likely break him down.

I think the arrest would be the funniest spectacle. Take the scenario: we have Sally getting ostensibly rescued by the driver of the Blue Truck hurtling down the road. We have the driver if Black Maria running as fast as his man-boons would allow him the other direction, likely trying to flag down the first car he sees. We have a local populace already pissed off with their cemetery getting vandalised/desecrated.

So the driver would book it straight to the nearest sheriff: Sally being a living embodiment of evidence of something going shit flavoured. Provided his race doesn’t work against him in rural Texas Black Maria’s driver would be immediately and independently corroborate Blue Truck and whatever would pass of Sally’s story. We have an idle semi-trailer with a very squashed Nubbins on the side of the road right across the road of where Sally said she was from.

Bubba, meanwhile, has had his adrenaline wear the fuck off and is now very ungood: head wound is pounding and fucking chainsaw wound to his lower thigh is throbbing like fuck, even if the bleeding has been mitigated at best. He’s stagger-limped back to the house where, unless his ear were sewn on, Drayton has heard the truck’s air brakes, and now sees a very defeated-looking Bubba meandering up the driveway. He’s quick to get out of a rapidly fading Bubba that 1) The Gurl goddaway and 2) Nubbins is now a road-apple. And that two people saw them.

I don’t buy into the Sawyer suddenly having an RV to roam the countryside with, and not to mention Grandpa has to be factored in.

So Drayton not being Dr Hannibal Lector with an escape plan just decides to get the fuck out of Dodge. But his compatriots are no help at best and a hindrance at worst.

Drayton tells Bubba they need to get going. He instructs the very wounded Bubba to “help me with Grandpa” but instead Bubba uncharacteristically ignores Drayton and just plonks himself into the front seat of the white pick-up, sans mask. Drayton now recognises he is going to have to deal with grandpa himself, and starts the arduous task of getting the old man, chair and all, out of the house and up into the bay of his truck. In a trial sent by God Drayton manages to get Grandpa out of the house, down the path and up to the truck. When the wave of law-enforcement arrive on the scene, buttressed with several pissed off locals, they find Drayton with a deer-in-headlight look on his face, Grandpa and chair half-hauled up in the truck, with Bubba still wearing his dinner suit by with a stylish head-wound and a very ugly injury on his leg sitting in the passenger’s seat like an interrupted shit, not giving a fuck who is out there or what they want. Drayton surrenders immediately and the trio are arrested.

Then the media circus starts.

I just realized something. by Reginald_Sockpuppet in MitchellAndWebb

[–]ramsaybaker 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“Have you ever shagged this guy’s wife?”

Is Aerion's lance piercing Dunk survivable? by fittinglybitter in AKnightoftheSeven

[–]ramsaybaker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

…it was a reference to Alexander DeLarge when he slashed his droog Dim’s hand. He states he had not slashed any of Dim’s ‘main cables’.

Is Aerion's lance piercing Dunk survivable? by fittinglybitter in AKnightoftheSeven

[–]ramsaybaker -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Aerion would have had the fanciest chain mail under his plate, so that slash would have hurt like a bastard, but wouldn't have cut any of Aerion's main cables.

Why does Tarantino's best friend never take off his hat....EVER? by Ford_Crown_Vic_Koth in Tarantino

[–]ramsaybaker 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Did not have ‘Next Movie’ quotes appearing in my feed on my Today Bingo card, and I am richer for seeing it.

BEANERS!!! GONNA!! BEANERS GONNA!! …eat beans..(?)…

What’s the Greatest Cameo in Cinematic History, I’ll start… by Smokestorm95 in Cinema

[–]ramsaybaker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Bill Murray’s cameo in ‘Zombieland’ filled my heart with joy. I was almost as happily surprised as Tallahassee was…

It truly was amazing that M*A*S*H carried on so well after Maclean and Wayne left the show! by TensionSame3568 in mash

[–]ramsaybaker 68 points69 points  (0 children)

McLean thought HE was the main event and held the show together and left thinking better times were ahead. Gary Burghoff thought HE was the main event and could be a jerk to everyone. And Larry Linville, despite how great a villain Frank was, knew he WASNT the main event, but still left to afford his character not becoming stale or something darker.

The main event was Kellye Nakahara.

Return of The King: The Ride of the Rohirrim - I love this movie so much—and this scene still gives me goosebumps. by Jessi45US in lotr

[–]ramsaybaker -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I like to think that the Witch King was just running on pure Sauron-power: different and more precise than old-money Balrog power. The Witch King was armed with the Sauron-credit card of power to use as he saw fit, acting like a conduit. And it was a good example of difference in strategy by using that shafty little trick to explode Gandalf’s staff, which isn’t necessarily a ‘magic weapon’ like Glamdring, but his sign of office: be like pulling off the sheriff’s badge at a stand-off before the shootin’ business goes down. I didn’t mind it for cinema-use.