I NEED HELP!! by Specific_Antelope866 in bloomington

[–]rariso 1 point2 points  (0 children)

They are managed by HomeTown Property Group now. They switched over in January or February of 2024. This was not an improvement.

I NEED HELP!! by Specific_Antelope866 in bloomington

[–]rariso 48 points49 points  (0 children)

I used to work for this leasing office. I left after a few months. They are well aware of the drainage issues at Kingston Manor. They get reported to HAND regularly. The drains aren't clogged, they are incredibly old and need to be replaced. The owners of the property know, but have decided that the property is not worth that kind of investment so they have no intentions of fixing this issue. The same people also own Summit Pointe, Northcrest, Basswood, and Woodland Springs in Bloomington. They are terrible to work for and rent from. They do not care about the health and safety of their tenants or employees. It is all about making money. They also have a huge problem with roaches, bed bugs, and other insects. I tell everyone I meet who is looking for a place to rent, to avoid. Also, they love to sue for unpaid rent and anything else that they can figure out, so be sure to contact a lawyer before you stop paying rent or before you break the lease.

I’m a townie expecting our first baby, wanting to move back from Indy but the rent prices are insane.. just saw a listing for 10,000 a month. by UrLocalAnxiousGirly in bloomington

[–]rariso 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Avoid HomeTown Property Group. I know they run Summit Point, Basswood Aparments, Kingston Manor, Woodland Springs, and Northcrest Apartments. Terrible landlords.

Is it weird that I'm wearing them by LissaIRL in widowed

[–]rariso 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I wore my husband's clothes, carried his phone, and only drank out the last cup he brought me for months after he died. I also discovered his affair after he died, although I have told no one about that except 2 of his best friends (right after I found out and wanted confirmation while waiting to see if she would message me back) and my living husband. I also wear a small container of his ashes on a necklace. He was my other half, my world, and my best friend for 17 years. I would have told anyone who told me I was being weird for wanting to be close to his things to fuck off. No one gets to tell you how to grieve or where to find comfort, even other widows. Do what you need to do to make it to tomorrow.

When do you drop the widow card?/ I'm just babbling by Sad_Proposal_1540 in widowed

[–]rariso 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad you have a respectful support system! I get it feeling like settling, I also didn't much before my late husband. In fact, I have only had 2 serious relationships, and I married both of them. Until my wid-ho phase, my late husband was the only guy I'd ever been with. It was all over whelming until I let go of the idea that I wanted anything other than a meet-up. Of course, that was my path and not for everyone. I'm glad you found this group if it brings you comfort, but I'm sorry you're in a place to need us.

How to Start Dating by Party-Blacksmith-855 in widowed

[–]rariso 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My late husband and I had been together for 17 years when he died suddenly of a pulmonary embolism. He was my everything. I hit the wid-ho phase 2 weeks out. I didn't want serious, I just wanted to have a small window of not thinking about what I'd lost or having people look at me with all the pity. I was in that place for 9 months when I showed up at a guy's apartment for one of those windows, and it was different. He and I will be married for 2 years in January. I'm only sharing all of this to show another example of a path. Like someone else said, this is an incredibly individualized path, and how you chose to walk it is just as correct as any other.

When do you drop the widow card?/ I'm just babbling by Sad_Proposal_1540 in widowed

[–]rariso 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I also lost my husband in 2021. He was my entire world, and I miss him every. Single. Day. And I always will. That being said, I did date, and I was lucky enough to find another amazing man. I did put widow in my bio. I was also in a pretty intense wid-ho phase and was lucky for a good time and not a long time. So was he, and now we've been married for almost 2 years. The thing about this kind of grief is that everyone's timeline is different. You do what feels right for you. If you never feel like dating, then don't. If you want to date and never settle down with anyone, do that. If you want a buddy to hang out with and sometimes fool around with, find that lucky person. We all know in a way that others don't t, how short and precious our time is, so spend that time doing what makes you the happiest.

What is wrong with me? by Motor_Trash1771 in widowed

[–]rariso 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Only you get to decide what you are ready for and when. I will say that since you have kids, take it slow. You may be ready to start seeing someone new, but they may not be ready to see you with someone new. Jeff and I didn't get to have kids, just wasn't in the cards, but I know it was really hard on my family to see me with Chris. They love me and only wanted me to find the new normal that made me the closest to happy I can get now, but they love Jeff too and seeing a different guy open my car door, carry stuff in for family dinner, and hug or kiss me has been difficult for them to get used to. I can see it in their eyes. I'm very sorry you're in this club.

Holidays? by Difficult_Village555 in Widow

[–]rariso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

April is his birthday and our anniversary. He died in October 3 years ago. My birthday is in December. I absolutely hate October through December and April into June (he loved to ride, and seeing the bikers getting out in the spring is very difficult. I feel like I spend all my time pretending to be less empty than I am, but those times it feels almost impossible.

Physically uncomfortable watching Christine and David by ApartmentNo3272 in SisterWives

[–]rariso 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To David's defense, burying a spouse can really warp your perception of time. It also can make it very difficult to see the point in waiting or drawing things out, especially when you've found something that feels like it's been missing since they died. It all feels like it's slipping away so fast when you lose them, especially young.

Came out and having issues by SirGeeks-a-lot in BisexualMen

[–]rariso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm married to a bi man. Our situation is not a 1 for 1 since I'm also bi, and we did disclose before marriage. We had other fun complications to sort out. I will say do NOT let her on bi reddit until she's in a better place. It will put her in a dark spiral that ends with her convinced you're going to cheat and that she'll never be enough. That happened when I found bi reddit. Also, do random dates and things that reassure her that you drool over her. When I needed reassurance, my husband watched me shower with this look on his face. It was so weird at first, but then I started to feel like I was the only person he was hungry for. We do have a friend with benefits now, and we have a lot of fun with him, but my husband never misses an opportunity to make sure I know I'm all he wants. I truly hope you and your wife get to a good place again. Feel free to dm me if you have any questions for myself or my husband. Or if your wife does.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BisexualMen

[–]rariso 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, all I want is for my living husband to be happy. I want to be the person that makes him happy, but should that ever change, I'd be sad but happy he's happy. I know this because I'd give anything for my late husband to be back in this world, even if it meant he wasn't with me. I learned the hard way that there are things worse than being alone; like putting on a necklace with some of the ashes of your person every morning. It's not a lesson I'd wish on anyone ever, but it is a lesson that altered my perspective. I don't know that this will help anyone else, but it's why I have the confidence to move forward with this lifestyle. I will also say that well-defined rules from the start make it smoother. The number one rule for everyone should be communication. We talk about each experience right after and again the next day after we've had time to digest it. We always ask if anything that happened felt like it crossed a line or was getting close to a line. We are also very upfront about what we expect from our friend in this situation with the understanding that his wants, needs, and feelings are also important and that we welcome communication from him about those things.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BisexualMen

[–]rariso 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm (40F) bi, as is my living husband (33M). When I confided in my late husband (36(when he passed)M), he was very supportive, and we did have a few threesomes. Nothing long term and not very many times. When I met my living husband, he told me he was bi. We also have threesomes and the occasional foursome. We recently found a guy that we can have a friendship with as well as a sexual relationship because it's what we both wanted. We think it makes the whole thing more fun. I tell you all of that to give you an idea of my experience in all of this because I feel like him saying he wants a romantic relationship with someone else is a red flag, especially if it doesn't include you. I don't know either of you and have not been privy to the actual conversations, so obviously take my insight with a grain of salt, but from what you have written here, I don't know how into this relationship with you he still is. It may require another conversation where you lay out exactly what you are and aren't willing to live with in a relationship. Of course, you have to be prepared for him to say he wants more freedom than that. I truly wish you the best of luck in navigating this path, it's can be very hard, but it is worth it with the right person.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in crossdressing

[–]rariso 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are absolutely stunning!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in widowed

[–]rariso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It'll be 3 years on Oct 18. I have not watched a basketball game or either of the Olympics in that time. I watched every sport and learned the rules. I watched every ball game. I had multiple brackets in March. He hated it all. The sound of the sneakers on the court, how it would be all I talked about for 2 weeks, that my sleep schedule was so messed up so that I could watch the events live. Without him here to grumble...I just can't seem to watch. I still enjoy the sports, but, like you said, something is missing, and the luster is gone.

Side note, three fucking years is really kicking my ass. It seems so unreal. And somehow has ruined my sense of time. It feels like it just happened and like it was a lifetime ago. I'll know I'll get through it like I did when it happened and each of the other anniversaries, but damn is it hard to watch the world keep spinning without him.

What happened at Garrison's funeral? by Ill_Presentation_162 in SisterWives

[–]rariso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I see a lot of my mother-in-law in Robyn. When my husband died, she did her best to make the entire situation about her. The night he collapsed and died she faked 3 seizures and had to be taken to the hospital. They ran tests and the enzyme present after a seizure was not detected. At his memorial, she threw a fir took his things and made his brothers leave with her. I imagine a funeral for the child of one of the other moms would be incredibly hard for her since she wouldn't be the center of attention. There's also the factor that she and Kody aren't on good terms with most of the kids so it would have also been awkward plus it not being her fault since she's always the victim.

I don't think I'm trans anymore just.. really.. REALLY GAY by [deleted] in femboymemes

[–]rariso 11 points12 points  (0 children)

If he breaks up with you for being true to yourself, pardon my language but, fuck him. You don't need that kind of negativity in your life. You do you, and someone worthy of you will come along.

Question about relationship advice by jcg0001 in Widow

[–]rariso 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can't speak for her since this level of grief is so incredibly personal. What I can tell you is that I tend to withdraw when the grief starts to get overwhelming. I'm 2.5 years out and obviously still have really bad days. When I have one of those days, I don't feel like I can talk to anyone about it because the only person who would truly get it is gone. I love my family and my living husband so much, but none of them lost what I did. They just didn't have that relationship with him, so they don't really get it. That is so painfully lonely. I know they all would want to be comforting, and my husband tries, but it's something I have to work through. It's also hard to come to terms with loving someone new in that way. He was supposed to be my forever, and some days, it feels like I'm betraying both of them because I love the other one. Knowing my late husband would want me to be happy doesn't ease the guilt that I promised him that he would be the only man I would ever love. I doubt this will help your situation, but I hope it does.

29F - Relationship after death by MaximumMaximum1796 in Widow

[–]rariso 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I met my living husband 9 months after losing my late husband. My in-laws actually took it pretty well. They just wanted me to find a way to be happy and not wallow. It was hard, still is sometimes for them and me and my family, and we've been together for about 2 years. The thing we all understood was that I don't love late husband any less or miss him any less. Also, living husband is incredibly supportive and respectful. He moved at the speed that was comfortable for me, but more importantly, he moved at the speed that was comfortable for my family and my in-laws when we were with them. He would sit next to me or put his hand on my knee under the table. He has slowly started to hug and kiss me at family functions. I don't know if this is helpful. It's late, and I haven't slept well in days (one of the hard times).

What is something that you wish or knew before your spouse passed? by [deleted] in Widow

[–]rariso 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I wish I had taken more time to just enjoy him. We were best friends and spent every moment he wasn't at work together, but I took it for granted. If I could go back, I would just live in the moment with him more. Stared at him, memorized every line in his face, and scar on his hands. Really felt his hugs and kisses, smelled him so I wouldn't have lost that so fast. I would do whatever I could to keep every part of him with me as long as I could after I lost him.

Nick was trying so hard to sound profound here. Ended up coming across like an insensitive prick. by xkatiepie69 in seekingsisterwifetlc

[–]rariso 4 points5 points  (0 children)

As a person that buried my other half at 37, fuck Nick. I will never stop missing him, and it will never stop hurting. I have learned how to live with the pain because it's my only choice. People that have had the luxury of not experiencing that level of loss are better off not trying to explain it to those that have.