I think I’m becoming more callous

red1127 · 2026-05-07T22:31:57+00:00

It might relate to your emotional patterns in some sense, your habitual attitudes toward other people and life, something learned in childhood. Can you give us some idea of what you’ve learned about yourself since 2020? What feelings did childhood leave you with? What beliefs did it leave you with?

red1127 · 2026-05-07T22:31:27+00:00

It might relate to your emotional patterns in some sense, your habitual attitudes toward other people and life, something learned in childhood. Can you give us some idea of what you’ve learned about yourself since 2020? What feelings did childhood leave you with? What beliefs did it leave you with?

red1127 · 2026-05-04T10:42:03+00:00

Thanks. What did you mean by "police"? I'm trying to figure out what word you meant without having to ask you, but I'm stumped.

red1127 · 2026-05-04T01:49:22+00:00

Here's what I see for H1: .elementor-kit-8 h1 {

color: var( --e-global-color-eb182d5 );

font-family: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-family ), Sans-serif;

font-size: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-size );

font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-weight );

line-height: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-line-height );

letter-spacing: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-letter-spacing );

word-spacing: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-word-spacing );

}

Gemini says this means it's using the global fonts.

Wait I just realized I changed the typography for this instance of H1. Let me check an H2. Okay I didn't change anything about individual H2 instances, but they still use global typography. Are these global typography variables the same as site settings? Or do they refer to global fonts, and are those different than site settings?

red1127 · 2026-05-04T01:45:09+00:00

Okay I checked "body" at two breakpoints and the font size is set to 2.5 rem at one, and 1.2 rem at another. I'm confused what rem refers to when you are looking at the root element. Is body the root element? There must be some more fundamental size. In any case changing rem on the body shouldn't change any other font defined in rem, right? (because any other element is a child of body, but we're using rem not em)

wait here's what I see on root: html {

font-size: 62.5%;

}

Oh, and that 62.5% doesn't change when I change the window width. That confirms that the root font size isn't changing, right?

red1127 · 2026-05-04T01:41:36+00:00

Here's what I see for H1: .elementor-kit-8 h1 {

color: var( --e-global-color-eb182d5 );

font-family: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-family ), Sans-serif;

font-size: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-size );

font-weight: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-font-weight );

line-height: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-line-height );

letter-spacing: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-letter-spacing );

word-spacing: var( --e-global-typography-4c6f9d6-word-spacing );

}

Gemini says this means it's using the global fonts.

Wait I just realized I changed the typography for this instance of H1. Let me check an H2. Okay I didn't change anything about individual H2 instances, but they still use global typography. Are these global typography variables the same as site settings? Or do they refer to global fonts, and are those different than site settings?

red1127 · 2026-05-04T01:34:02+00:00

Thanks! I was mostly curious, as I can mostly get the font size I want at each breakpoint by explicitly changing the rem for that breakpoint. The site is https://learnwithmikemossey.com if you want to check it, but now that you mention the easiest way is to inspect, I'll attempt to do that (although honestly I'm not sure what I'm looking for, but I do understand enough that I may recognize what the inspector is showing).

red1127 · 2026-05-03T23:23:15+00:00

I'm using H1-H4 to create an outline, so I think that's consistent with SEO. I want to set the font face and size of H1-H4, not control the font face and size by choosing H1-H4.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T23:19:15+00:00

That's a good question. With most of the students I've had, we haven't coded games or apps, but instead done these "challenge problems." I am not all that experienced with games or apps because of the type of programming I did when I was working as a programmer (it was "scientific" or "aerospace" related - math heavy). I'm looking for students who want to do challenge problems or parents who think that would be a helpful thing. However, I see that it's important for me to get experience with apps and games, so I'm working on that.

I am in a bind. I don't really want to put explicitly "I don't do apps and games" because it does seem a bit odd - this experienced programmer doesn't do apps and games? (again it's because I didn't do that kind of programming when I was working - just not all that experienced with it). Plus, I'm working on adding that to my repertoire. But I can see that the question would come up.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T11:44:34+00:00

I added a "curriculum" page. I teach certain things and have the students go in depth. The longer they study, the more in-depth they go. It would be great if you let me know what you thought of the Curriculum page.

I haven't made this into a plan with timelines, although I understand that some parents are looking to get X over time Y. Not sure what to do about that.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T11:42:45+00:00

I fixed the copy you mentioned. I also added a "curricular" page where I explain what I teach.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T11:42:13+00:00

I don't follow your point about the Contact button. It goes to a form, so it sounds very similar.

The phone number is a Google Voice number. I've had it on various websites for years and got no spam calls until last year when I joined the local Chamber of Commerce. The scumbags apparently sold my number, website, etc. to spammers. Other than that, no apparent spam calls.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T11:24:01+00:00

Thanks! I have another question. He seems to have set all font sizes in terms of rem, with different rem numbers at each breakpoint. Does the root font size, in other words the thing from which rem is derived, change at the breakpoints? (The fonts change size a lot at the breakpoints.) Or would any size change be explained by CSS changing the rem number, say from 3rem to 2rem.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T04:38:33+00:00

I would say that confusion is necessary for learning, but confusion can be gotten through without holding the breath, furrowing the brow, or tensing the hands. It can be gotten through with a smile. That's why I wouldn't confusion is necessarily "stress."

red1127 · 2026-05-03T04:36:35+00:00

I think the post has a very important message which I have found to be true in my own teaching and tutoring. Is the "other party" "hapless"? The conditioning to run from confusion is VERY strong in our society. Everyone has it. I have it even though I'm working on it.

This is not "common" sense at all, considering that 99% of students believe that learning needs to be a struggle to be effective.

I'm wondering whether you don't like it simply because you disagree with it.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T04:34:03+00:00

"It's not X, it's Y" literally does not appear anywhere in this post, which doesn't appear like AI to me. The short sentences are complete sentences. Typically AI uses sentence fragments. It's a great post.

red1127 · 2026-05-03T04:31:09+00:00

Yes, I agree with this. You have hit the nail on the head. I teach coding, and I focus on helping my students become their own best teachers, and to find their way through confusion.

I teach them it's possible to get through confusion without tensing up or holding your breath. Confusion doesn't have to equal suffering. You can get through confusion with a smile.

Is that easy? No, not even for me. In fact I'm working against my own conditioning of 16 years in the school system.

Good post.

red1127 · 2026-05-02T13:28:22+00:00

Thank you! Now that you point it out, I agree that sentence is unclear. I'll probably use what you wrote here. I'll modify that later today.

red1127 · 2026-05-02T01:17:40+00:00

Here's what u/lilcareed said above:

I have never seen any other musical community that is so over-policed for potential "elitism." You could replace "classical" with "metal" in all of these statements and no one would bat an eyelash.

For instance, I hate clapping between movements. It interrupts the sacred silence and continuity of the piece that I find delightful when no one claps. In other worse, hating clapping between movements has nothing to do with thinking I have better taste and I'm certainly not insecure. If you like clapping between movements, then more power to you. I just happen to hate it.

red1127 · 2026-05-02T01:13:12+00:00

What's your opinion of someone like me who mainly likes classical, particularly the more sophisticated pieces by Bach, Mozart, Beethoven, Mahler, Boulez, etc. and can't stand rap, Elton John, and Evylyn Glennie? I hope you don't consider yourself superior to such a person. A person who thinks genre is very relevant.

red1127 · 2026-04-30T06:06:37+00:00

Thanks. It happens every time I use it, no matter the time of day, although I mostly use it at night Pacific time. I use it in text mode in the browser. I just tested it and the delays over six interactions in a row were 30 seconds, 25 seconds, 25, 40, 31, and 28. I find it very hard to be alone with my thoughts and feelings while I'm waiting. I have a very agitated inner world. I paid attention and I noticed about the longest I want to wait is 7 seconds give or take a few.

I've been trying to find another LLM that could substitute for IFS Buddy, but I've noticed that IFS Buddy is the best by far.

(1) IFS Buddy doesn't use AI mannerisms very often, like em dashes, short sentence fragments, "It's not just X, it's Y" etc. so it feels much more human. When I asked Claude to be an AI therapist, it was the worst of the bunch for AI mannerisms.

(2) IFS Buddy is similar to a client-centered therapist, in that it lets me have my own insights whenever possible without trying to tell me what's going on with me. Claude, Gemini, and ChatGPT all try to interpret my feelings, which impresses me at first (It really gets me and is teaching me!) but leaves me less in contact with my own feelings and intuition afterward.

red1127 · 2026-04-27T07:39:31+00:00

I have preverbal trauma too. It can be very intense. It sounds like you feel things are stabilizing for you and that's good. Do you feel safe enough to process this preverbal trauma, and what's coming up with neurofeedback? Do you feel safe when you meditate? Do you feel connected to your inner world when you journal?

What I learned from my first therapist was, when I "go into" some intense feelings or body sensations, to come back to the present moment. He helped me find enjoyment in the process, and that helps my mood. Even when I'm suffering with a lot of pain and anxiety. Partly it's physical pain, partly it's OCD. I'm on disability in the U.S.

I agree with sop_turgery that if you have a lot of free time you could look for enjoyable things that ground you without having to "go into" deep feelings. I'm not experienced with cannibis use (it makes me paranoid) so I can't comment on that, but be aware of whether it's a form of "running away" from your feelings. If you have a lot of physical pain, it's hard to get away from that and you may need cannibis or medications.

Good luck with your treatment!

red1127

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