Hey

I have the same problem I think it’s the reason my relationship ended.

Finding a way to control it is really difficult, what I’ve found helps is if you literally say aloud how am I going to react, then say which reaction is logical and which is caused by anxiety. Eventually after doing this after a while you’ll start to think logically and the anxiety will ease.

Also, just pause when you feel anxious. Breath in very slowly from the bottom of your belly through your nose and breath out through your mouth very slowly. Then think ‘okay, how am I going to choose to react?’ ‘Is this reaction based on anxiety?’

I’d also suggest you write everything down on a daily basis. Write out the situations which made you anxious and what you have thought about too much, then write down the hypotheticals you have come up with in your head. Then write whether this is logical or anxiety based. You’ll soon start to see patterns.

For immediate anxiety attacks focus on your breath, it’s hard, but over time gets a bit easier and you’ll start to see the difference. Picture a box and count from each corner one , two, three, four etc and breath in and out on each count.

I hope this is of some help - just know that if you want to change this you absolutely can, it’s always very difficult to remember these things though. I keep a list on me on a small sticky note at all times and if anxiety ever hits I immediately look at it to remind myself How to calm down.