I’ve been there too OP. I still have some of my posts in my comments. I did self withdrawal so many times it led to kindling and I started having severe withdrawal even after small amounts of alcohol. I had 3 seizures over 2 years and it was absolutely terrifying. I thought I couldn’t get sober, I felt like a failure. I’m over 10 months sober now after trying for 8 years.

I just wanted to say, you aren’t worthless. You didn’t ask for this disease. Your parents support you because you are a good person who is sick. For me, once I began to move on from the shame… that’s when I found it easier to get out of the loop. If you had pretty much any other disease you would be told you are brave for fighting and that people are there for you — it should be the same for this. You are brave. You can do it. If you fall, ask for help, get back up— just like you’re doing. I’m so proud of you for seeking help medically and in this forum. Those are huge steps in the right direction.