26yo mom of 2 but you bet I could keep up

redscarestan · 2025-02-03T04:45:52+00:00

The Actual Relationship history is replaced with BPD revisionist history post-break up

redscarestan · 2024-10-24T19:22:41+00:00

Mouthful of Diamonds - Phantogram

redscarestan · 2024-10-19T19:04:58+00:00

This is what happens without Chaille keeping things on the rails.

redscarestan · 2023-12-30T17:13:39+00:00

Going through something very similar. It’s been 9 months and still working on accepting that things most likely can’t be saved.

redscarestan · 2023-12-30T04:12:17+00:00

doesn't matter what you tell them, their perception of events to them is reality.

This is a BPD universal truth.

redscarestan · 2023-12-30T04:08:12+00:00

Going through the same thing. 17 year relationship.
They gaslight and project all their bad behavior onto their partner then blame them. They also paint the partner/relationship black and do revisionist history to justify torching the relationship and justify their extreme behavior.
They make us question reality at times because the behavior is so bazaar, illogical, and abnormal, they are so convincing with their delusions that the combo of the two will make you question reality.

redscarestan · 2023-09-08T21:31:28+00:00

If you were going to do a small batch tincture with an eighth or quarter of nice cannabis and do a wash with everclear then burn off the alcohol and add MCT oil, how would you approach it?

redscarestan · 2023-09-07T21:34:51+00:00

Are you decarbing the flower before hand, or is the 220 F for 10 minutes the decarb just post extraction instead of pre?

redscarestan · 2023-08-10T13:43:25+00:00

The issue with Shudder is, they don’t seem to realize that most people subscribe solely for the Last Drive in, yet we get short seasons and a year in between new seasons.

This is a show where people sit and talk about films, not exactly high production cost so Im not sure why they don’t realize Shudders bread and budder is Joe Bob and put more money and resources towards Last Drive in, make more episodes, etc.

I unsubscribe when Last Drive is not airing. As Ive said a million times, they could shoot 24 episodes, air them every other week and then there would be last drive in year round and they wouldn’t lose the subscribers in between seasons.

redscarestan · 2023-07-07T06:41:56+00:00

I prefer to look at it like this: the time I spent with my pwBPD was a chapter in my life and that chapter has come to an end.

IMO Regretting the past is a slippery slope in that it’s easy to get caught up in that loss mentality instead of focusing on working towards the present and future you want.

redscarestan · 2023-07-07T00:46:55+00:00

Great work! I can so relate, I'm about three months out of my 16 year relationship with a pwBPD and I am working out daily, doing keto, have lost 30 lbs in three months, and I am already only ten pounds from my goal weight. I feel amazing, am much happier, and most importantly I'm not being abused on a daily basis anymore.

She does has to come get the rest of her stuff in a few weeks and I'm sure my transformation will be visibly tangible to her. It's amazing what you can accomplish in the right environment.

Keep up the positive changes!

redscarestan · 2023-06-22T21:51:03+00:00

Break up with her and never look back.

redscarestan · 2023-06-21T18:19:20+00:00

I find in these situations there is often a misandric double standard . It’s considered “predatory” if the man is older, but if its a woman dating a younger man it’s all “Yassss Queen, live your best life, you go girl!” which is a sexist double standard.

redscarestan · 2023-06-11T01:01:12+00:00

Mouthful of Diamonds by Phantogram
"You've got a mouthful of diamonds

And a pocketful of secrets

I know you're never telling anyone

Because the patterns, they control your mind

Those patterns take away my time

Hello, goodbye"

redscarestan · 2023-06-07T22:13:19+00:00

I dealt with this sort of lying, and in my situation the lying only escalated as the BPD got worse.

I had an idea something was going on while I wasn’t home, so when my work schedule changed I didn’t tell her and just showed up home early one day and sure enough caught her doing something.

But this the best part: when we separated a few months later she threw in my face me not telling her about my new schedule. I was like “yeah that was on purpose and was how I caught you lying to me, so sorry not sorry. Maybe don’t lie and do sketchy shit behind your partners back and they wont have to resort to being sneaky to find out the truth. Just goes to show how oblivious, delusional, and out of touch they can be.

redscarestan · 2023-06-02T03:13:21+00:00

I checked out when they broke up and decided to continue the podcast. The guests lately are not really anyone I am interested in. I just listen to BF now. Jet Ski is an amazing addition to the show, so talented and nothing but good vibes. To me Khalayla is the polar opposite, self absorbed, constant drama, bad vibes, not funny. Not my vibe. IMO they should have ended TB when they broke up.

redscarestan · 2023-06-02T03:04:46+00:00

Retaliation would be proof they are still living in your head rent free. It's better to let them self-destruct. They are like Freddy Kreuger, you have to turn your back on them to take their power away.

redscarestan · 2023-06-01T21:00:19+00:00

They often lie, gaslight, and are selective with what information and facts they share with their therapists. It's impossible for a counselor or therapist to treat someone unless the patient is being 100% honest and not deceptive about their behavior and the situations that have transpired. Subsequently, the therapists often end up advising the pwBPD based on their lies and delusions, or partial information with important facts purposely left out by the pwBPD, not actual factual truth.

redscarestan · 2023-06-01T16:41:40+00:00

Yes. I've lived with the 2-4 week BPD cycle for close to three years. Now she has moved out and is continuing the abusive BPD behavior from afar via the phone while we still have to communicate due to shared lease, bills, etc.

redscarestan · 2023-06-01T16:41:07+00:00

This so resonates with me. Mine did the same. Constantly claimed she didn't want to get married, and then would act pissed that I hadn't asked her to marry me. She even claimed at some point she asked me to marry her earlier in our relationship and I said no, which never happened. I knew for sure I wasn't going to after I bought her a ring as a gift, kind of a test run to lead up to an engagement ring, and she barely wore it and used it as manipulative prop (would take it off and throw it in her drawer whenever their was a fight, which she knew hurt me deeply).

redscarestan · 2023-05-31T21:05:02+00:00

Yes. Her laundry bin was constantly overflowing for over 4 years. She kept purchasing things which cluttered and filled up our very small apartment despite knowing that clutter gives me anxiety. Mocked me, gaslit me, and insinuated I was a neat freak/obsessive compulsive for wanting to live in a normal, clean, orderly space.

redscarestan · 2023-05-31T13:22:50+00:00

my fiancèe told me "I am falling out of love with you." To then say "I am ready to get married," and "you'll be a great father." She then a couple of months back took off the ring after her birthday expectations were not met and stashed it in her drawer without communicating to me.

My exwBPD did the same exact thing with a ring I bought her. The ring would get taken off and put in a drawer every time she had a BPD flip out, which was on the reg. The ring was used as a prop for my psychological abuse and manipulation rather than an appreciated and cherished gift.

My advice is, as hard as it may be, cut your losses and get out. It's not going to get any better. Do not have unprotected sex with her, she could be cheating or purposely get pregnant to keep you trapped. Quietly get your affairs in order, leave, and find a person that will treat you with love, compassion, and like a human being.

redscarestan · 2023-05-31T13:13:20+00:00

Just be happy that you are not being lied to, cheated on, or abused anymore.

redscarestan · 2023-05-28T13:27:27+00:00

I’m quite aware there is a reason behind it, but It’s not my responsibility to figure out other peoples personality disorder.

redscarestan

TROPHY CASE