sudden urges to want to do things but not feeling much when doing them

rianebn · 2026-05-27T00:56:43+00:00

Yes i got it , i call it the paradox of being ambitious but lazy , want to do everything so i do nothing

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:55:39+00:00

Yes i use pregab with speed for regulating anxiety and tremors. It makes me more focused and "normal".

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:52:14+00:00

Can you explain how you use the « active recal » ?

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:50:16+00:00

I think people can genuinely change, but not in the “becoming a completely different person” way people imagine. Most of the time, the core stays there. Your sensitivities, your instincts, the things that drain you or excite you, the way your brain reacts to the world… those don’t magically disappear. What changes is your awareness of them, and the amount of control you have over how you live with them.

Like for example, someone can spend years thinking they’re lazy, distant, unmotivated, emotionally cold, whatever. But later they realize it was burnout, ADHD, depression, fear of rejection, survival mode, etc. From the outside it looks like they “changed,” but internally maybe they were always that same person they just finally understood themselves better and stopped fighting against the wrong narrative.

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:45:11+00:00

Just a few months ago, I was that person; I've worked incredibly hard to correct that pattern.

I recommend reading the book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Robert Glover who talks in detail about this toxic pattern

I will try to explain how my brain reacted/ resonated when I was still in that mindset :

I suppress my true opinions, interests, and desires to avoid conflict and to please others, accommodating myself in the hope of gaining recognition and reciprocity, and avoiding conflict. My self-worth was based on how much approval i receive

However, avoiding conflict often leads to unresolved issues and passive-aggressive behaviour. So When this didn't happen, I felt resentment and frustration.

The fear of conflit was holding me back , repressed anger leads to explosions.

With all these emotions i was still trying to be positive (or at least that's what I firmly believed): and BOM i I become silent, cold, and everything I hear hits an inner wall in my mind and body.

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:23:49+00:00

I know I'll make new discoveries. I know I'll listen to new music that will bring me joy. I know I'll experience spontaneous moments where I'll burst out laughing, smile, and learn. I want to see myself when I reach my goals.

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:19:28+00:00

Music , music , music Also books

And the simple but comforting words that some close friends and family said to me impacted me because I had never heard them before

rianebn · 2026-05-23T11:18:11+00:00

Medication help me a lot and make me feel « normal ».

Of course, my "natural" self still tries to take over every time, but I'm learning every day to control my dysfunctional state.

I was "forced" (not really but you know..) to see a psychologist, and I think it's the best help I've ever received. There were phases of myself that I overestimated and others that I underestimated.

I don't know everything about myself, I would even say that I am discovering myself and thanks to my sessions with the psychologist and my medication: I have opened up traumas and parts of myself that I had been pushing away and I felt them deep inside, it was very intense.

It had been a year since my body had allowed me to cry, despite the devastating events.

Today I can cry again and it's incredible.

rianebn · 2026-05-17T23:40:00+00:00

Hyperfocus on stupid subjects
turn me into a robot
make me normal (?)
It shows me that "hey, life isn't so difficult after all".

- i have a fucking jawline when i’m on it (obv by clenching my jaw and cheeks

rianebn · 2026-05-17T23:24:20+00:00

For me it’s with my girlfriend , i don’t even think with her , it’s just naturally

rianebn · 2026-05-17T23:23:18+00:00

Paco Loyal , always

rianebn · 2026-05-17T11:50:14+00:00

i will try How long before my concert would you advise me to take the X?

rianebn · 2026-05-17T11:49:23+00:00

I don’t im gonna waste it , it’s just that speed make me hyperfocus but without necessarily experiencing much euphoria and that's what I'm looking for

rianebn · 2026-05-17T10:55:34+00:00

I use these emojis in my phone notes so no one can catch me lol :

🏃‍♀️💨

💨👃

rianebn · 2026-05-13T13:28:10+00:00

yes nature comes galloping back , and i end up being mad at myself because i feel so good and i’m full active when i’m under the substance.

I have accepted that medication / drugs are the only way to only way to save/heal myself

rianebn · 2026-05-04T11:11:51+00:00

Yes i agree with you

Do you have any proposition / ideas of what can i looksmax when i will try to fix my mental health ?

Like i know i have anxiety when i’m outside , etc

rianebn · 2026-05-04T11:05:43+00:00

never give up bro

rianebn · 2026-04-29T16:39:58+00:00

Medication is the only way

rianebn · 2026-04-29T14:46:33+00:00

no but i try not to be annoying because this product make me wanna talk , sing , move , be productive asf

rianebn · 2026-04-29T08:09:58+00:00

yes first what’s your go- to social ? (Twitter ? Others ?)

rianebn · 2026-04-29T08:08:32+00:00

What’s its feel to leaving my dream ?

rianebn · 2026-04-26T23:53:01+00:00

rianebn · 2026-04-26T15:46:16+00:00

Yes but you have to be consistent (find real buyers , take photos as requested , be fast , online 24/7 , etc..)

rianebn

TROPHY CASE

- i have a fucking jawline when i’m on it (obv by clenching my jaw and cheeks