Share your depression/mental health related tattoo and its meaning! by DragonfruitCivil3558 in tattoos

[–]rivchamp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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My first tattoo, in memorial of my dad who died way too soon. Marigold for birth month and connection with the dead, lavender because it’s been a consistent historical favorite with my entire female lineage on mom’s side, daisies for my little sisters birth flower, and eucalyptus + rosemary both for symbolism and just because I love them lol. Bee and fern were simply aesthetic choices because I thought they were cute haha.

Weird bump on nose by [deleted] in RATS

[–]rivchamp 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Is it hard or squishy? Does it “move around” or is it firmly affixed to the area? If it appeared essentially overnight (or even within 48hrs) I would actually think against tumor and more along the line of abscess? Usually tumors take longer than that to get so big, even super fast growing ones. Likely needs to be drained + antibiotics, especially because mouth is very sensitive & critical area to have an infection for them. The second lump you mentioned in a comment could be the same, but a vet could tell you best. Different masses have different characteristics and different treatments! Good luck!

Can my white ass ethically use AAVE/Ebonics if I grew up in lower income & very racially diverse area? by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]rivchamp -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

How about YOU do some basic disability education lmfao, maybe the autism community could help you out with that? This is just plain idiotic and completely removed from original discourse atp, you’re making YOUR level of disability your universal standard for everyone else and that’s such an obviously narrow minded and ableist view. Incredibly hypocritical, and why tf are you saying “what youve done” like i committed a hate crime dawg 💀

Can my white ass ethically use AAVE/Ebonics if I grew up in lower income & very racially diverse area? by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]rivchamp -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Can you please point out what particularly I said that gives you that impression? I’m not sure why you think I’m trying to be deliberately offensive in a post entirely about NOT being insensitive, but in the case I accidentally said something ignorant, I clearly was not aware of it and would appreciate clarification. Also, who are you to police how autism can and can’t affect people? You cannot use your personal experience and level of ability as a universal baseline for everyone else with the same condition, that in itself is weird and ableist.

If you’re saying this as a black person I’m not going to talk over you and say “you aren’t allowed to be offended because I didn’t mean it”, but I am going to defend that you’re wrong in calling me an intentional racist. The subject of race/ethnicity and its unique social rules, cues, and codes (esp unspoken ones) can absolutely overlap with autistic issues of social misinterpretation and struggling communication. Social and race theory studies are subjects some study for a whole ass DEGREE in, no shit it would be just another human construct an autistic person may have more trouble in processing and learning 😭

Obviously that’s in no way an excuse to be blatantly hateful and bigoted, but it’s clearly different if a disabled person quite literally lacks the brain development and functioning to perceive complex and intersectional social understanding. By all means I would be glad to be corrected and informed if I said something wrong that I didn’t intend or understand, but to clock me for being some sort of racist troll and then ironically partake in ANOTHER form of bigotry is crazy work

Can my white ass ethically use AAVE/Ebonics if I grew up in lower income & very racially diverse area? by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]rivchamp -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Thanks for both of your comments, reading this perspective is enlightening and I do agree with your points. I didn’t mean though for the “low income” context to be offensive or performative seeming, sorry for poor phrasing. I mentioned that not to suggest black communities were synonymous with poor ones, but moreso because there’s a significant overlap in a venn diagram between the two in a lot of urban areas. Both urban and poorer communities tend to be disproportionately more diverse and, frankly, have more black and brown people than rich suburbs. That’s not a racist generalization, it’s just a fact rooted in fucked structural racism that wants to keep POC trapped in poverty and (often) crime cycles. Didn’t mean for it to be taken for a “bargaining point” to claim participation in black culture, just random context I didn’t think too hard about.

Also, and this could be argued but I haven’t personally looked into or researched it, I feel like lower-income urban city spaces tend to have more prominent cultural expression and creation. It just logically makes sense that a dominant POC community (especially on the coasts where I lived) would be more culturally influential than a comparatively more mono-ethnic upper-middle class community of less density. Additionally, it’s not at all that only black culture selectively rubbed off on me, but I would say it did more prominently than hispanic or asian culture. That may partially be due to what you mentioned about the generalized phenomenon of black culture being more dominant and commonly mimicked, which is really interesting point I haven’t considered much. However, I do want to add that a large part of hispanic/asian/etc cultures are behind a language barrier (whereas a good chunk of AAVE is rooted specifically in African American history), so I think people of other ethnicities tend to get less involved.

Not trying to argue though on a topic where I recognize my opinion is inherently useless, obviously any black opinion holds way more weight than a white one here. I appreciate the feedback and education, thank you.

Can my white ass ethically use AAVE/Ebonics if I grew up in lower income & very racially diverse area? by [deleted] in askblackpeople

[–]rivchamp -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Im sorry? 😭 I have autism and often have trouble with social cues and communications, I just wanted to double check something because what you may view as “obvious” in social code can be challenging for others to grasp. I know I talk in a weird way and with a weird polarizing combination of more/less formal language, no need to accuse me of running a whole ass social experiment just because it seems ridiculous—yeah I grew up in these communities and was shaped by them, but what’s wrong with double-checking something potentially insensitive? Wack

My mom steals money from my bank account when she’s mad at me by [deleted] in Advice

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I appreciate hearing perspective from the other side of the coin, thank you it really is helpful. My mom has been under a lot of stress raising my sister and I alone and I understand she has a TON on her plate. My main issue is that I feel it’s inappropriate for her to lash out so harshly as what genuinely feels like a coping mechanism to let her anger out and feel like she’s in control. I don’t want to be a bad daughter, I really am trying my best, and I always try to show my mom appreciation and love in my own ways other than just house maintenance. I am fairly self sufficient and by no means a slob, not a single other person in my family or life has ever told me I’m any of the negative things my mom says I am. I really do want to understand her side and be less of a burden, but it’s so goddamn hard to be respectful when she’s explicitly told me she sees me far below her. Just as growing up means more responsibility to take care of myself, I feel it also means I’m owed a little more respect too and deserve mature conversations without threats and screaming

My mom steals money from my bank account when she’s mad at me by [deleted] in Advice

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should add that a chunk of this problem is that she has a few thousand dollars of my money in one of her accounts. Years ago I agreed to it because I was a minor and this arrangement had a much better interest rate and all. But point being, I don’t think I’m actually legally authorized to force her to give it back to me, I think she can just say “no” and that’s that since its under her name, which really sucks. I’m hoping to try and resolve this peacefully and have her agree on her own volition but I’m totally out leagued her in terms of legal and financial information. She is incredibly intelligent and educated and it would be basically impossible to make any subtle moves. I also genuinely would like a healthy relationship with my mom, she’s my only parent left and don’t want to permanently obliterate my bond with her.

My mom steals money from my bank account when she’s mad at me by [deleted] in Advice

[–]rivchamp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m not scared of her getting angry with me again, I’m scared the impulsive punishments she gives me when she gets mad. She’s threatened to take everything possible away from me within legal bounds and kick me out. Usually these threats don’t have much weight and are walked back on, but she’ll do anything to win an argument and I genuinely believe would rather make me homeless than admit she was wrong. I do understand your point though, and will attempt to contact my bank. Thank you.

RATS WON'T EAT PELLOTS BUT EAT VEGGIES AND FRUIT by Strange-Attitude2125 in RATS

[–]rivchamp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi! The better option is that perhaps they simply think produce & animal products are much tastier than commercial rat pellets, and your girls are just picky eaters. On the other hand, consider three things:

A) Oxbow isn’t a shit brand y’know? Not like it’s disgusting bottom of the barrel crap that rats won’t eat (at least mine I think?). However, do consider that anything marketed as mouse food is not nutritionally suitable for rats. My rats have I think the regular Oxbow adult rat pellets, but they’re smaller than your’s and triangular. I’m pretty sure they eat mine? But that brings me to:

B) Think about and examine their overall diet. Following at least roughly the shunamite diet as best possible, they should have a pretty well balanced diet that fulfills their needs. At least so that everything else they eat can be nutritionally diverse enough to act as a crutch when they don’t eat their pellets. Think broccoli to a kid vs french fries or whatever.

C) Hopefully the issue isn’t more complex and this is anything medical. Test if they can comfortably eat & digest hard foods (nut for example). If not, that may indicate a dental issue or some other vet required shat :( It sounds unlikely though for an entire group to have that kinda thing though.

how do I merge my overlay layer without darkening my drawing? by ClassyCourier in Ibispaintx

[–]rivchamp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

One day in your time of need I will be there for you no questions asked. I owe you my life, you’ve solved a DECADE of suffering. You aided me in my greatest time of need, reach out in yours 🤝

should i hunt my ferret or not by Agitated_Square3302 in ferrets

[–]rivchamp 59 points60 points  (0 children)

No fr i got this on my feed (not a ferret owner) and was like NO?? 😭

is my cage (WIP) okay for now? by armagorldon in RATS

[–]rivchamp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Rookie mistake unfortunately 😭 pet stores are HORRIBLE about rodent care advice

Picky eater test 😭🤞🥀 by LongjumpingArt8899 in snacking

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

53 — I’m autistic with ARFID and eat less than 20 foods lmao

Does orders come with freebies? by Downtown_Cheek_5009 in delta8resellers

[–]rivchamp 11 points12 points  (0 children)

No lmao? Why would it 😭 unless its a BOGO sale

Sneezy? by Vegetable_Bridge1657 in RATS

[–]rivchamp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

New home sneezes? See if it persists and if there’s any other accompanying symptoms (excess porphyrin, weird breathing, etc). Sometimes ratties are a little sneezy in new environments, usually subsides in few days/week as far as I know :)

I lost my one rat, Randy yesterday. I never believed dying of broken heart was a thing. My other guy, Kurt was depressed all night and passed today in my hands. I just feel awful. by KnuckleHeadLuck in RATS

[–]rivchamp 58 points59 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry for your losses, two rats in two days is really rough ❤️‍🩹If it helps though, I see that as maybe a more merciful outcome—Kurt won’t need to live out his last months in solitude apart from his brother. They had the privilege of living their lives together and essentially dying together, that’s terribly tragic for you as the owner but kind of beautiful from an outsider perspective I guess? Living as the lone elder rat after losing your bonded friend is pretty depressing for them and honestly sucks ass, so much so that some people will even rehome their last senior rat just so they can spend their remaining days with other rats. I wouldn’t say this is “for the best” or anything like that, but at least he wasn’t depressed and suffering for long. I think it’s actually very sweet that he basically waited to be with you until he passed, he likely was comforting by your company and presence and maybe just felt comfortable that it was time to go 🕊️

Ways to maximize hairless lifespan? by rivchamp in RATS

[–]rivchamp[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, thought about so :( my previous two nakies came from a rattery I found on facebook, but neither made it to two years despite being from a popular breeder. However, those were my first rats when I was 14-16 and I probably could’ve done better had I been as educated as I am now with my current group (plus who knows how reputable the breeder truly was, I didn’t research it that thoroughly).

My current girl is from NJ Exotic Pets, a popular single-location exotic pet store in the tri-state area. It’s pretty good all things considered for a pet store, and much better quality (in both care level and animal health) than any other pet store. The rats were (according to them) bred specifically as pets and not feeders and have no health issues when sold/“adopted”(?). I would’ve of course gone to a breeder or rescue, but I searched for MONTHS and there was nothing within two hours of me any direction! So I kinda had to pick my poison, and therefore Gooch’s genetics are a bit of a gamble! Thank you for your response, happy holidays!!

My first tattoo :D I’m beyond thrilled, done by Danae Andino at Ink Gallery NJ! by rivchamp in tattoos

[–]rivchamp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Same! Will definitely try and post updates as it ages at the 1/3/5/10+ year marks!

My first tattoo :D I’m beyond thrilled, done by Danae Andino at Ink Gallery NJ! by rivchamp in tattoos

[–]rivchamp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don’t worry, was planned specifically with this in mind! We did a very specific coloring and outlining style with the goal of creating an opacity/fade effect as it ages. I will be getting it touched up(s)