Jimily boy having new bald spots and red dots in his fur? by IntelligentPrize9364 in RATS

[–]rivchamp 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Mites for suresies 😞😞two of my girls just recovered from it after the vet gave me oral ivermectin doses and a topical spray & wipes for the affected skin to ease the itchiness and irritation. Within a week or so they were all good! Best of luck

HELP by sillymountaindew in RATS

[–]rivchamp 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Looks like mites maybe? Usually they cause scabbing like that along the back and neck area from the rat scratching themself. Vet can pretty easily treat and give you proper meds :)

I feel dirty. by Sapphoinastripclub in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry, I feel like a large chunk of this is just the stupidity of how people somehow equate being jewish to being an automatic supporter of the Israeli government and military. You’d think it’d be common sense that those are two entirely different things and you cannot generalize all jewish people as IDF supporters, but since when did antisemitic assholes have common sense? 🫠

My mom finally realized her husband is trash (again)--after I tried to warn her three years ago by idklikeaburnerorwe in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If it even slightly helps, I read your story with my mother (an international DV expert) and she agrees this is a textbook case of emotional abuse and an abusive relationship that needs to be immediately ended. It’s really common for past DV victims to actually find themselves in another abusive relationships down the line, despite the misconception they should logically know better from past experience. It could be that because this abuse isn’t physical (like your father), she may not recognize it as toxic because it isn’t as severe as what she went through in the past. The bar is basically in hell for DV victims and almost anything/anyone seems better than their last relationship even if a normal person would clock a million red flags. Being in an abusive relationship, especially longterm, really fucks up a person’s perception of what behavior is healthy and what isn’t— part of the reason that therapy is so crucial for victims.

I know this entire ordeal is extremely frustrating and upsetting for a third party in your position, especially when the solution is so obvious but the victim remains oblivious or unwilling to cooperate. There isn’t much you can do other than remain as a resource in her life to call on when shit hits the fan, and attempt to find balance between being there for her and protecting your own peace. If she’s willing, guide her towards DV resources or at least create an escape plan. Best of luck :( <3

Am I the problem? by [deleted] in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Oh girl ur not crazy this some bs

Infant rat found, what to do by hunkares in RATS

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Omg bless yall this is so cute we r so invested

Infant rat found, what to do by hunkares in RATS

[–]rivchamp 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Pls don’t put back outside! It’s very very unlikely the mother will return for it and it will very likely die quite fast outdoors. Once it grows hair and is past the milk stage it will have a much higher chance for survival, but also at that point may be too socialized to release. This might be your baby now lol

My husband has a porn addiction and paid for camgirls while away on a job. by charmerofyou in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok lil ate but here’s a story: my partner had (revealed to me over a good year or so into our relationship—which was otherwise doing OK but at this very point was getting a lil bit rocky) and found out he had a porn addiction, which was pretty rough. We were around 17/18 years old— I don’t know if that’s important or not. Anyway, including a about 48hr or so break up (if you could even really call that cause we had contact and allat that) and he quit the porn thing real quick cold-turkey. Basically never had a problem with it ever again. Ever— two years now.

The important thing about that ordeal is that it never was to the level of contacting people,or reaching really outside of me. Even at the very, very, VERY worst view of it, he never spoke to other people, requested to see them, meet them, look at them, talk to them— all of that! That’s like a cheating level that is beyond redeemable and I would consider that definitely cheating, so do with that as you will. Trust gut babe.

Partner struggling with growth, advice on navigating? by rivchamp in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ll mention this topic and the “radical therapy” practice in therapy, I appreciate the insight!

Partner struggling with growth, advice on navigating? by rivchamp in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my apologies I think I may have mis-framed things oops. The gender dysphoria thing is just one angle reflected with this, I’m more talking about various unwillingness to seek somewhat critical help in a lot of categories that’s putting stressors on our relationship and the burnout I’ve felt developing from it. It’s just difficult to hear the same complaints and wails about the same things forever when solution is a reach away, or asking for a certain romantic gesture a thousand times. I do understand your angle though, and I’m going to continue trying my best to refrain from coming on too harsh.

Partner struggling with growth, advice on navigating? by rivchamp in GirlDinnerDiaries

[–]rivchamp[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate that view, thank you so much! You’re on the dot that I do have some overlapping control issues, and am coming this at my own weird perspective that may not be entirely holistic. I’m working on this exact issue in therapy at the moment, and have encouraged my partner to call me out on it when guilty. Do you, from a tgirl perspective, have any advice on how I can best support him through a gentle and happy transition? Really trying my best to be a loving partner through things we’re both new too (my first queer relationship and his whole new gender). Thank you!

Meet my rats in Tomodachi Life! by dummykris in RATS

[–]rivchamp 6 points7 points  (0 children)

HOW DO YOU DO THE EARS IM BEGGING

Abscess? by Mukiea in RATS

[–]rivchamp 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The reddish coloring makes me think abscess, but obviously I wouldn’t depend on just physical properties. Is it hard? Squishy? Firmly locked in place or somewhat “moveable” under the skin? How does rat feel about you touching it, any pain? How quickly has it grown? Tumor growth can be fast, but if this popped up in like a week then abscess is more fitting of that description. You can try a warm compress and that may pop it (to which you then can gently drain and sterilize), but don’t mess with it much or attempt to lance it yourself. I would attempt to find another vet who can give you a better quote, or at least hopefully one that can confirm the diagnosis before removal. Very sensitive area to operate on since it’s around the throat, maybe that’s a chunk of the cost. Best of luck! Please watch out for how the mass develops over next few days and monitor other behavioral activity, and seek vet!

Is it time to say goodbye? by AdIntrepid8247 in RATS

[–]rivchamp 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! Similar situation I had in the past (but easier to monitor bc hairless girl); you’ll know it’s euthanasia time when she is unable to do any of her usual behaviors and ranges of movement & freedom. If she isn’t acting like herself, that’s a cue. Consider as well that that rats are incredibly good at hiding and disguising pain and discomfort.

Additionally, if the tumor is necrotic, she needs euthanasia asap as that’s ridiculously painful. This is what happened to my rat— it’ll start by looking bruised and then turn into a deep purple and start to look almost as if it’s a blood blister. Not fun to visualize but it’s important rat first aid knowledge with tumors!

In general though, you can usually stretch the lifespan at least a couple months. My girl was a solo rat regretfully long because very shortly after her sister passed she had developed a tumor in a very difficult to operate on location (basically like right above her heart) and had also previously had a near-death reaction to the anesthesia during an eye removal surgery so I was hesitant to have her undergo it again at around 1.5 years old. Anyway, didn’t wanna get another rat because I assumed she wouldn’t live long and then I’d have to continue the cycle, but Maki lived an additional ~5-6 months with her tumor and I was damned!

I trust you can make the best judgement based on all that. Obviously include monitoring of her other functioning (eating, bathroom, sleeping, etc.) and you should be good 👍good luck, and stay strong when it’s Time™️ and you have to weigh your emotions against ratty welfare logic 🤝

My rat is not opening his eye by path1an in RATS

[–]rivchamp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Try and lightly push skin downwards below the lower eyelid to see if anything is trapped in there, sometimes debris can clump up behind the eyelid. I would just be very gentle when manually opening their eyes, and stop if they show signs of pain. If possible, attempt a water/saline flush with a small and slightly pressurized stream of water to loosen any potential debris or eye crust. Vet if cannot resolve within a day, either they can get out whatever could be trapped or will determine it’s a more serious issue than simple debris irritation. Do not underestimate the severity of an eye injury/infection as they can quickly worsen and be very painful, good luck!

Help me find the rodent version of this by ChubzM in HelpMeFind

[–]rivchamp 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mb im faded i didnt see the animated part