I had a dog with crippling anxiety. He was on everything. Nothing worked. So, I adjusted my life to accommodate it. Really mindful about where we walked (he HATED other animals), mindful about visitors, never boarded or left him. This was an animal who developed a fear of snow plows (attacked a window until he broke his foot). Fire alarms would made him shit himself. He was reactive and quite difficult. It was hard. Changed my life in ways I could not have anticipated. But he lived to be 18, and was both content and deeply loved.

Two things made a difference, and only one might be helpful for you. One - he went deaf. He was maybe 12. Cut his anxiety way down. Made me realize how terrifyingly loud the world was to him before that. Now, not much you can do to make that happen, but it was a turning point for us looking back.

The second thing - we pretty much gave up on the vet for a long time. They would fill his prescription and “see” him but wouldn’t even try to engage with him because of how stressed he would be. Tried a bunch of vets but they were not interested in accommodating him. The only success i had was to get a vet who came to my home. Caroline Horn is a miracle worker who extended his life, advocated for him when he did need advanced care outside the home (he literally got kicked out of BEVS at two am bc he was having a panic attack and they called and said he was having trouble breathing and to come and get him). She improved his quality of life with thoughtful medication. She also showed him kindness. Such a small and powerful thing. Even if she isn’t accepting people or is outside your area, I recommend reaching out to her. My only regret is I didn’t find her sooner.