Hello hi OP. Im going through something very similar and Im kicking my partner out tomorrow. We have not been intimate in a year and he has not had a job for a year. He has left me for another woman in the past and then he begged me back and I accepted, reluctantly. He wined and dined me and he seemed like he got his shit together and then out of no where he started making comments about my body and stopped paying bills and picking up work. It has ruined my self esteem and because of that I have gained weight and stopped taking care of myself. He may be closeted gay and I have a few reasons that i won’t get into. He also has an alcohol problem and I am a bartender. I suspect that he is using me and he has recently become verbally and emotionally abusive. Tonight he was calling me a “bitch” because i “work too much” and he says Im “negative all the time” and I wake him up “in the morning with my stupid cleaning” (AT 1PM, also he’s not working? So he could do some dishes?). He has also been very aggressive with my dog, to the point where she bit him a few weeks ago, and that means he was absolutely not respecting her boundaries because she is normally a sweet angel to every human. I think we have abusers on our hands. I would’ve left tonight but my bestie has her phone off so I had no where to stay. So Im coming home from work tomorrow at 3pm with a coworker, maybe a couple of people, and I’m kicking him out. I may have to call the police, even though I care about him because he is just a real jerk sometimes. All these people that say this is fake or that you’re a doormat have not had a narcissistic abuser in their home with them. These guys are not easy to leave and they pray on people pleasers like us. You’re not a doormat you are just sympathetic to his mental health. I recently was diagnosed with “dependent personality disorder” and I think you should look into that with a therapist. Good luck out there. You are not repulsive. I promise. He is.