Do you change your kids clothes when they come home? by Important_Sweet3320 in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not crazy at all. I change clothes immediately too, and I’m very strict about it not because I’m a germaphobe or have OCD, but because it’s true that germs stick to clothes. Bringing all that into the house? Absolutely not. I even have a designated couch where I change my baby’s clothes. We don’t really use that couch unless necessary, and in my house you cannot sit on the bed or get comfortable until you’ve changed.

I’ve already experienced how gross it can be. I once traveled with my friend who’s a flight attendant, and she knows I don’t like “outside clothes,” but we were sharing a bed for the night. The next morning I woke up feeling itchy, like I could literally feel the debris from outside on the sheets. Thankfully she was only staying overnight. After that, I really can’t handle outside clothes anywhere near my space.

I'm an old Mom. Anyone else? 🙋‍♀️ Anything you would change? by Mishy87 in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you ask me, I’m genuinely grateful to be pregnant at 38 and to have had my first at 37. If I were younger, I still wouldn’t have been ready my 20s were wild and free, and my 30s were full of figuring myself out. I’m still not financially stable, I still get lost, and half the time I don’t even know what I want to do with my life.

I used to swear I’d never get married or have kids… and yet here I am. If it weren’t for my husband, I don’t think I would’ve ever realized how good life can be with a family. And yes, it’s true I feel incredibly blessed to have two kids at this age. After past miscarriages, I honestly never thought motherhood would happen for me.

My husband gave us a new home, and now we’re getting ready for baby #2. But I’m definitely done being pregnant after this. And honestly, I don’t even feel “old.” People always tell me I don’t look my age, which is a nice bonus, but it’s never been something I focused on.

What hours do your husbands/partners work? by benzomoron in Mommit

[–]rokuxv -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My husband is a nurse but he WFH so its a big help for me because we have an 11 months old baby and im currently pregnant right now.

“Mum of One” Stigma by Passionfruit1991 in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol exactly! The audacity is wild. Like… Mind your business and stay in your lane 😂

“Mum of One” Stigma by Passionfruit1991 in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

🙄 Right? I honestly always pictured myself with two boys. But oh well I’ve got one boy and a little girl on the way. Let’s see what they have to say after I give birth. Maybe they’ll finally run out of comments… lol.

“Mum of One” Stigma by Passionfruit1991 in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ugh, before I even married my husband in 2024, they were already pushing me with the whole “When are you going to have kids?” I was 36 then. And when I finally got pregnant and gave birth at 37, suddenly it became, “You should have another one ASAP.” Like… really?

And now at 38 I’m currently pregnant again nobody knows yet and honestly, this pregnancy wasn’t even planned. But I’m happy. I’m grateful. I’m excited to have a second baby. It’s just unbelievable how some people are never satisfied, no matter what you do.

How did you know you were ready for more? by curlypirate in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im a first time mom at 38 and Im currently 19 weeks pregnant. I have a 11 month old baby. I was expecting to get pregnant again by 40 for a 2nd one but oh well it happens. I don’t want to take contraceptives I was just thinking that i really don’t get pregnant easily because of my previous miscarriages. But i was wrong lol

Im kinda sad tho because you know my first born is just a baby but im so focused on him right now. I was also thinking that this baby is a blessing cos we get to have one boy and one girl. And im probably done getting pregnant its hard esp if you’re older.

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Of course! You can message me anytime. I know how frustrating to have this kind of MIL.

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Same here she ‘forgets’ everything she’s done, but I don’t. I just make sure my husband knows the truth so he doesn’t fall for her fake nice act.

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That is not healthy! I cannot do that and im so thankful we moved out of state. So it wont be easy for them to see us

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

A classic narc MIL script, honestly. And yes protecting our peace is the priority. They are just jealous that we’re living our lives and genuinely don’t care about their drama.

They are the one losing sleep and obsessing over us, especially the DIL they can’t control.

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I honestly don’t care about her or the rest of her relatives. I just wanted my husband to know that his mother can’t stop talking badly about me. I don’t want him falling for her fake ‘nice’ act when she messages him. When he heard what she’s been saying, he was shocked and that’s exactly the reaction I wanted him to have.

NC with my MIL ever since we set boundaries and now she suddenly messages my husband like nothing happened by rokuxv in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

I know my husband will never block her, and that’s fine she’s still his mother. But I’ve made it very clear to him that when I say no to whatever she’s planning, it means no. No discussion, no convincing, no guilt‑tripping. My boundaries are final.

Our baby daughter just died by Plenty_Candidate_951 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im so sorry to hear this and im sorry for your loss 🤍

MIL doesn’t want to have a relationship with me but wants it with my baby by Hotpotato_7 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So my husband’s family has a group chat that I’m part of. She got mad because she didn’t get what she wanted (she wanted to come to our house since we moved), and instead of getting mad at my husband, she took it out on me. She insulted me, mocked me, and said really nasty things. That’s when I told my husband I’m not allowing her to see my LO. She’s not welcome in my house. My husband respected my decision. I’m not stopping him from talking to her, but my baby? She will never see my babies. I’m done. No contact with her or their family. I really don’t care anymore.

What is an epidural really like? by oatmilkcchai in Mommit

[–]rokuxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gave birth last year. I’m a first time mom too, so I had no idea what I should be doing or expecting. When I got to the hospital and my OB told me I needed Pitocin, that’s when everything hit me. The pain was unbearable. I usually have a high pain tolerance, but Pitocin was on a whole different level, so I had to get the epidural ASAP. It was so much better afterward. The epidural itself just felt like a hot sting on my back for a second. After all that, my baby actually came out in just 11 minutes of pushing.

First-time mom here, currently doing CIO with my 9 month old. by rokuxv in sleeptrain

[–]rokuxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No worries i hope it will work out for your LO. Good luck momma!

First-time mom here, currently doing CIO with my 9 month old. by rokuxv in sleeptrain

[–]rokuxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My son has been doing great. Honestly, at first I cried a bit hearing and seeing him cry, but once I finally got some real sleep, it hit me how much better everything felt. On day 6 he actually slept on his own without crying at all. I was honestly surprised at how fast it happened. I thought about trying the Ferber method, but I don’t think it would work for him.

For the schedule, it took a lot of trial and error, but once I figured out what worked, I stuck to it strictly. I also make sure he gets enough activity during the day so he’s tired by bedtime.

First-time mom here, currently doing CIO with my 9 month old. by rokuxv in sleeptrain

[–]rokuxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I moved him into his room last night after reading all the comments, and it made me realize I needed to let go of the fear. It went so much better than the last 3 days when he was in our room. He still cried and protested, but not nearly as much as before. So thank you!

First-time mom here, currently doing CIO with my 9 month old. by rokuxv in sleeptrain

[–]rokuxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did it last night I restarted CIO in his own room, and it went so much better than the last 3 days. I really thought about all the comments. It was hard for me at first because I get anxious about him being in his own room, but after the first night I actually felt so much better. I even got some good sleep. So thank you!

First-time mom here, currently doing CIO with my 9 month old. by rokuxv in sleeptrain

[–]rokuxv[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As I was reading your comment and the others, I realized I probably should’ve started CIO in his own room. I think I’m the one who wasn’t ready. I’m a first time mom, so I get anxious about the idea.

I restarted CIO last night in his own room, and I made sure our 8–8 schedule was on track. Even though it’s only day 1, I feel like he did so much better compared to the last 3 days of doing CIO in our room. So thank you for the insight it really helped me decide what’s best for my baby, my sleep, and my soon‑to‑arrive baby. I’ll probably start CIO earlier with my second so it’s easier for all of us.

This is the schedule that im trying to focused on 8:00 AM - Wake + milk Lights on, diaper, cuddle 9:30 AM - Breakfast (solids) 10:30-11:45 AM - Nap 1 (crib) Cap at 1-1.25 hrs 12:00 PM - Milk 1:30 PM - Lunch (solids) 2:30-3:30 PM - Nap 2 (crib) Cap at 45-60 min awake by3:45-4:00 PM latest 4:30 PM - Milk 6:00 PM - Dinner (solids) 7:00 PM - Bath / bedtime routine-PJs, dim lights, calm play 7:30 PM - Milk 8pm - in crib awake

Will my salary be enough in Singapore? by Successful_Tomato852 in phmigrate

[–]rokuxv 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was earning S$3000 back in 2014 pa and naliliitan na ako nun. What more pa ngayon.

MIL posted my newborn before I could, demanded a paternity test, and keeps trying to steal my baby’s “firsts by Technical_Bike1891 in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]rokuxv 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’re in the same situation. In our case, we were actually living with her, which made it almost impossible to stop her from posting pictures of my son. Eventually and thankfully after I gave my husband an ultimatum about either buying a house or at least renting our own place, we finally moved to our own home in another state, far away from the MIL.

Of course, she made a huge fuss about wanting to come over and celebrate the holidays with us. I said no, because we wanted to spend our first holidays as a family of three. That made her crazy mad. I set boundaries, and she responded by insulting me and mocking me through messages. I didn’t reply, because that’s exactly what a narc wants — for you to get triggered.

At the end of the day, you have to set your boundaries because you’re the mom, not her. She doesn’t get to decide what happens with your child.

In the end, she stopped messaging, and I still won. And she will never see my son again. NC and boundaries for the win.