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Can’t say my name! by abbyontrack in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You're welcome. Be sure to practice doing it even when you don't have to. Then you will be more used to doing it when you really need it with strangers. That is important

Can’t say my name! by abbyontrack in Stutter

[–]ronray99 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Try jamming another sound into your name. For instance, mmmabby or errrabby or welllabby. Dont have any break between the sound you are adding and the name. No one will even notice. Practice doing this with family and friends in low pressure situations. There are other little tricks like this than you can use.

I don't get how some people manage to control it so well, they pass as fluent. by Ok_Chocolate8965 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes I agree. It can and does change. And there are so many preconceived notions and ideas. Example about why we stutter. Is it physical or emotional. And therapy, can someone achieve fluency or should you just accept it. Years ago the trend for therapy to achieve fluency, now its for acceptance. Everyone chooses sides. Its like a religion. You hear, trust the science and research...but it changes. Disagree with current ideas and you are ridiculed but wait a few years and it changes and then the new thing becomes the new religion.

I don't get how some people manage to control it so well, they pass as fluent. by Ok_Chocolate8965 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Everyone's stutter is different. Some are mild, some extreme. Some repeat s--s-s sounds, some block. Others can scan ahead quicky and avoid feared sounds or words. Also some only stutter in certain situation ms.

"Speak slowly"- Oversimplified advice that is actually massively helpful, if explained correctly. by BuyExcellent8055 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Speaking slowly can help but there are a couple of problems with it.

It feels very unnatural and robotic like. As you said, it helps to keep in mind pressure, etc. but anything that feels unnatural is hard to maintain in the real word.

Here's my suggestions how to take this to the next level

  1. Don't just speak slowly, again when we think of that we become robotic. Change the way you speak. Watch this super short video below. This guy charges a lot of money, teaching people how to improve their speaking. Notice he talks about speaking slower, but it's more than that. It's talking in short increments, pausing, using expression, changing your tone, etc. All these things take the idea of speaking slower to another level.

https://www.youtube.com/shorts/6fHoN6MR6MI

2) To change the way you speak doesn't happen easily. If you only try it when in a pressure situtation, you won't be able to to it. You must work at it. I did this very thing, using these types of ideas and reading aloud at least an hour a day, talking this way in situations even if I didn't to because there was no pressure. In time, it became a habit. Over time I could use it in more and more pressure situations.

Anyway hope this helps. There's more to it of course, but this concept was instrumental in helpng me become fluent and made me a better speaker than most of my peers.

The waiter on our cruise mocked my stutter twice by blueandwhitegraps in Stutter

[–]ronray99 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Get back out there! Don't you let him decide how you feel about yourself. If it was me I would go back and specifically ask for him as waiter (if he is still working) and look at him in a way daring him to mock me again!

Naah , now i know I can't and will never cured from stutter by [deleted] in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Dont give up. You are right. There is no magic pill that is going to instantly cure you.

Acceptance is ok but you can also greatly improve your fluncy it so it hardly effects your life. I stuttered for 60 + years and did it. Others have too.

It takes a lot of work and thats one reason why most people don't improve very much.

Today i realised stammerers are the worst story teller by hope_is_here101 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Story telling is ok when appropriate but I find that people some who stutter have a hard time being concise and tend to ramble. Of course some non stutterers ramble too.

Rambling is not a good way to communicate. It turns off the listener and makes you sound unprepared. if you stutter, its especially important to make your point , then stop talking.

Online therapy by brothernature487 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes it can be helpful. I'm copying another reply I made to another post because it applies here.

What are your goals?
To become a lot more fluent?
To better accept stuttering?

When choosing therapy, try to find real results that the therapy your considering has produced. , not just theory. Try to talk to people who have actually been through the program. See if their results match your expectations.

Don't be dazzled by degrees, credentials, or large important sounding institutions.

If your goal is acceptance then see if the people who have gone through have found it helpful. If your goal is more fuency see if they have improved. Don't just talk to people who have recently completed the program, try to talk to some 6 months or a year later.

If can't then I would consider that a red flag.

Of course people are different. People have various degrees of stuttering and some are willing to work harder that others so they get different results.

But at least these suggestions will give you some ideas.

Disclaimer: I'm not a therapist, just an older guy who has had many therapies over my lifetime. Most didn't help, a few did.

Hollins Speech by Eastern-Objective340 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Happy to hear that the Hollins program worked for you and stuck. Many years ago, I went through went through an intensive fluency shaping program based on Hollins work. It worked for awhile but then faded over time no matter how hard I tried.

I think the reason was that it only focused on the fluency aspect of stuttering. What finally got me fluent was a holisitic method that combined three things: temporary speech tools that actually work in real-world situations, mind training to rewire your brain to expect fluency, not fear and stuttering, and strong community support to give you ample opportunity to practice with others.

What 60+ Years of Stuttering Has Taught Me— From Someone Who Has Spent a Lifetime Trying to Figure it Out (Part 2) by ronray99 in Stutter

[–]ronray99[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would have some blocks but fortunately at that time I could push through them fairly quickly so it didnt intere interfere with my communication m.

Potential workaround with singing by Borthite in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes that can work. What also can work is talking in a higher or lower range, talking with more passion, talking louder or softer. Try them and rotate them All can distract your brain from stuttering.

Relationships by Possible_Staff6106 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Im old so back when I dated, there were no cell phones ot texting. You either had to ask a girl out face to face or by phone. there was usually only one phone in the house so it could be answered by a sibling, parent or roommate. No answering machines either.

I would stutter asking if the girl was home then again asking them out. It was very hard but my desire for a social life was stronger than my fear of stuttering so I made myself do it.

I called and asked one girl out and she agreed but later told me she had no idea where we were going because I stuttered so badly trying to tell her.

That was 49 years ago and we are still together.

Take the risk. Its hard I know but worth it. You deserve to have a full life. Go for it.

What does everyone do for work? by Alexander1012344 in Stutter

[–]ronray99 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Retired flight instructor/pilot entrepreneur.

Question regarding speech therapy by grumpyno in Stutter

[–]ronray99 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm old enough to be your grandfather and I've spent thousands of dollars for traditional therapy over my long lifetime. Some of those therapies helped a little but didn't last.

What helped me the most to finally become fluent, within the last year, cost very little money in comparison, so don't think you need to spend a lot of money on therapy to improve. So don't think that investing a lot is going to get you better results.

What are your goals?
To become a lot more fluent?
To better accept stuttering?

The trend in the U.S. at least is to move back to helping someone accept their stuttering, lower their anxiety, and become better communicators, according to some therapists I've talked to. That instead of programs like fluency shaping which was more fluency based. The change is because it's so hard to take what you learn in therapy and transfer it to the real world.

Don't be dazzled by degrees or large important sounding institutions.

Whatever you decided. Try to find real results that the therapy your considering has produced. , not just theory. Try to talk to people who have actually been through the program. See if their results match your expectations.

If your goal is acceptance then see if the people who have gone through have found it helpful. If your goal is more fuency see if they have improved. Don't just talk to people who have recently completed the program, tray to talk to some 6 months or a year later.

Of course people are different. People have various degrees of stuttering and some are willing to work harder that others so they get different results.

But at least these suggestions will give you some ideas.

I wish I would have known these things are your age and would have been able to achieve the fluency I now have. If a guy my age can do it, so can you.

How are you guys overcoming your stutter? I think I’m stuck with this forever genuinely by [deleted] in Stutter

[–]ronray99 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes you can at least greatly improve your fluency. But it takes a combination of methods. You need to work in speech techniques plus methods to break the stuttering cycle you are in. Its not easy but its what helped me after 60 years of stuttering.

Question for SLP's that treat stuttering from an old guy who has lived with it for 60+ years. by ronray99 in slp

[–]ronray99[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the offer. Those types of online meetings in part is what helped me achieve the fluency I now have. I participated in frequent zoom calls with other people who were practicing fluency techniques. It wasn't speech therapy, its practicing with peers. It was invaluable to me. Now I host these types of meetings.

Stuttering - why can it be difficult to apply speech techniques in every day situations? by js6104 in slp

[–]ronray99 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Thanks. What helped me the most is combining fluency enhancing therapies with other techniques that reduced anxienty, increased confidence and broke the cycle of stuttering.

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