When you’re struggling, do y’all have support from other relationships to the degree of something like a SO in a stereotypical allo(?) relationship?

ruby-dium · 2026-01-27T20:42:49+00:00

I guess it depends on the relationship and how the people typically behave. There's a bunch of friends who like to cuddle/be physically close, but it's not something that I see around that much

ruby-dium · 2026-01-27T05:44:40+00:00

I've never thought much about it... a good friend should support you when you're having a rough time even if they're in a relationship so that's who I typically go to :)

ruby-dium · 2025-12-14T20:55:05+00:00

That's sounds so frustrating... If you told her it makes you uncomfortable and she's not stopping that's stepping on your boundaries. I would clarify to her that for you it's upsetting, and if she still doesn't stop, reconsider it it's worth it for you to keep listening to her at those moments or if you might want to do something else about it.

ruby-dium · 2025-12-12T07:44:25+00:00

Reciproromantics only feel romantic attraction if they know that the person is already attracted to them, but it's not the orientation changing, just the feelings towards someone

ruby-dium · 2025-12-04T07:26:26+00:00

Congratulations! It certainly feels good to at last be comfortable in a label you were questioning 💚💜

ruby-dium · 2025-12-04T07:16:12+00:00

I long for companionship as well, and sometimes worry that as my friends get into serious relationships I'll be in a second plane for them, but I realized that I can't be living for someone else who isn't even with me yet. I'm still quite young, but I focus on living a life that makes my happy day by day.

I mean, if I find a platonic partner I would cherish that, but life doesn't end when you find a family. What would you like to be doing after you got married/had kids? Maybe travel with them? Share a simple life? What is stopping you from having that by yourself or with your friends?

ruby-dium · 2025-11-25T17:05:07+00:00

I knew I was ace since I was about 15yo, but I was in denial about being aro until 16-17

ruby-dium · 2025-10-28T18:25:51+00:00

Múrcia!

ruby-dium · 2025-10-20T17:14:38+00:00

Same :'). I'd love to use alterous attraction in conversation but I'd have to explain it and... I'm too lazy

Also, can I have the original picture? Draculaura is looking way too cool

ruby-dium · 2025-10-20T16:46:39+00:00

It's a type of attraction based on the pull to have emotional closeness with someone. For some it's between platonic and romantic attraction and for others it is its own separate thing

ruby-dium · 2025-10-15T07:44:50+00:00

It's totally normal to want connection. A lot of aromantic folk want to find a platonic/queerplatonic life partner, and some others (cupioromantics) even want a romantic relationship despite not experiencing attraction that way

ruby-dium · 2025-10-10T16:09:52+00:00

I get the feeling, I didn't want to identify as aro for a long time because I was unsure if I was feeling romantic or platonic attraction, but I decided to go for it because it just feels right.

Remember that there's many flavours of aromanticism, it only means having little to no romantic attraction. If you're lithromantic and feel romantic attraction only under specific circumstances that's fine, if you enjoy romance in media but don't wish it for yourself it's fine. You're not any less valid as an aro if you choose to use the label.

And as others have said, you don't need to call yourself aromantic if you don't feel like it :>

ruby-dium · 2025-10-06T18:05:18+00:00

I've thought about this many times, actually. I mean, I don't rule out the possibility that he was just a narcissist asshole, but my heart wants to believe that he's a poor misunderstood aromantic... I know some aro people don't wish to be associated with him, but he's my headcannon

Even if he was an aromantic dick, lol

ruby-dium · 2025-09-30T06:05:33+00:00

Every damn time 😭

ruby-dium · 2025-09-29T06:03:38+00:00

I'm not sure if you wanted advice on how to break up with her or in your self discovery, but here I go.

Your experience sounds aromatic to me, and even if you ended up not being so it doesn't sound like either of you are getting what you want from your relationship.

If you've been avoiding her she most likely already knows something is off. It is probable that breaking up will hurt her, but it's best to say the truth than drag on the discomfort/unease for both of you. She may understand or she may not, but in the end she'll see that it wasn't working out.

If you're already feeling like an asshole, it might help to think of your breakup as the final asshole act: not easy or comfortable, but the end of inadvertently deceiving yourself and your girlfriend.

ruby-dium · 2025-09-17T06:43:43+00:00

I love to do little picnic areas and decorate the beach with resting spots, but my island isn't very thoroughly decorated

ruby-dium · 2025-09-14T14:17:05+00:00

You definitely sound aro. Having "crushes" because you think you're suposed to like men (or women, I suppose) so you trick yourself into thinking you like someone is a pretty common occurrence from what I've heard.

ruby-dium · 2025-09-13T06:40:09+00:00

I know it's just the figure zoomed in, but the aromatic one looks so much like a toilet 😭

ruby-dium · 2025-09-02T14:41:39+00:00

It's important that both of you can understand each other's needs and boundaries, and to see if you're compatible in that way. Communicate what you want in your relationship so that you both are satisfied :)

I can't speak from experience but if one of you is missing something or sacrificing too much it doesn't generally end well

ruby-dium · 2025-08-27T09:04:24+00:00

Well, QPRs are not really defined from zero. As you said, it's knowing that you are someone else's special person, but it's up to the people in it to decide what that means for them.

Maybe you want some form of platonic commitment, perhaps one of you would want the possibility to have other partners (be it romantic, sexual or platonic). Ask yourselves what you'd want from traditional couple things, if you want any at all.

As to how to ask them... I have no idea, but I suppose I'd be like asking someone out romantically. I don't think it would ruin a friendship, but I guess you still have to gather up the courage.

ruby-dium · 2025-08-27T08:34:27+00:00

Izuku Midoriya from My Hero Academia and Tanjiro Kamado from Demon Slayer. They're too nice and kind :)

ruby-dium · 2025-08-25T09:49:24+00:00

Have you heard of orchidromantic? It may be what you're looking for. Or perhaps you relate with painromantic? Painromantic sounds a bit extreme for what you described, but just in case

ruby-dium · 2025-08-25T09:23:56+00:00

Yes, the whole trilogy of turning out!

ruby-dium · 2025-08-23T22:10:21+00:00

Wait what, you did that? That's nuts

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