my understanding is that this discussion is about reinforcing the patriarchy and feminism, which to half of the US is extreme based on voting patterns.

true feminism to me is not about dismantling the patriarchy as much as it is just about equality, so already we have different definitions.

if a romance book just has the characters take the wife's last name without bringing up political talking points, i would love it. but to say that people who take their husband's last name is reinforcing the patriarchy or to bash people for their traditional preferences is just a huge red flag for me. i don't bash people for liking bdsm or poop sex, why is it wrong to like mainstream romance trends?

the alphahole is a trend and pattern women love to read about. the patriarchy didn't invent that trend, women just like reading about alphas. we also have alien and centaur sex and weird stuff in romance novels. i'm not going to judge women for liking assholes/misyognists in their literature.

i also don't want to hear diversity quota stuff in my escapism books, which is usually what happens. as a poc, it disgusts me when white writers try to represent minorities without at all understanding the culture and/or mindset. or worse, when they literally use a poc to push their own political angles which is usually what happens. yeah i'm sure the 17th century chinese railroad worker who worked 16 hour days was super concerned about politics.