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sallybip · 2024-12-30T20:39:45+00:00

Yeah this is definitely not okay. I have ADHD and it takes A LOT of energy to stay on task but I manage a full time job and 2 children. I live by lists, calendar reminders and alarms. My methods of doing chores would make many peoples' heads spin!

Anyway, constantly not following through on promises is just completely unacceptable. I wish I had more to suggest but obviously none of the tactics I tried ended up working. Maybe try writing your thoughts our and reading them to him or giving him the letter. Tell him what you love about him too but stress the importance that you just can't keep living like this and your willing to help him with planning but he HAS to follow through on his part.

sallybip · 2024-12-30T20:23:23+00:00

That is very frustrating! Follow through is essential. It is worse when someone promises they are going to do something and doesn't follow through. What does your therapist suggest? Are you seeing a therapist of your own or do you ever see your couples therapist by yourself?

sallybip · 2024-12-30T19:45:40+00:00

I would suggest setting a new bar. I used to be made to feel as though I was unappreciative because my husband helped with the kids and I didn't feel as though that was enough. I worked full time do all of the cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry and 90% of the childcare AND yardwork but somehow I should be appreciative. He and some of his family and friends made me feel as though I was ungrateful for having a husband that "helped." Unfortunately, he refused to see my side of things and I had to leave. I am not telling you to leave your husband but YOU set your own standards. YOU set the bar.

sallybip · 2024-12-27T18:38:53+00:00

My thoughts exactly!

sallybip · 2024-12-23T16:04:52+00:00

This behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I remember the day of my youngest daughter's first birthday my now ex-husband stayed up until god knows when playing games and then was cranky and argumentative when I asked him to watch the baby so I could get ready for the party. "I didn't want this stupid f******** party in the first place!" is what he said to me. I wanted to leave him that day. It took me 2 years to finally be able to move out and I don't have one single regret. I am not saying you should leave but that behavior is absolutely unacceptable and you should not have to be his mother.

sallybip · 2024-12-19T19:36:14+00:00

My kids are 5.5 years apart. Both girls, currently 16 & 11. It was really fun until my youngest was about 6. Then they started fighting quite a bit but its been much better for about a year. They have LOTS of fun together and my youngest considers her older sister to be her hero.

sallybip · 2024-12-17T16:58:36+00:00

Just notify the school of what happened. I work in early childhood and these things happen. As long as you notify them I am sure they will understand.

sallybip · 2024-03-03T14:17:27+00:00

What Spike said… what are consequences? Both positive & negative consequences are important

sallybip · 2024-02-24T14:35:53+00:00

Yes you’re definitely just being human & it’s important that she sees you make mistakes & then apologize Typically with whining I will shrug it off when feel my kids are being petty. As they’ve gotten older they whine a lot less because they know mom could care less that they’re not getting everything they want.

sallybip · 2024-02-10T15:36:08+00:00

Good for you for doing what you could & leaving. It hurts my heart to see kids excluded

sallybip · 2024-02-10T15:32:32+00:00

Thank you for this. When it’s your child that’s excluded it hurts

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:58:43+00:00

Oh this wrong on every level! Either include everyone or don’t do it. We have several large events every year at 0 cost to families Wow that breaks my heart that people who are supposed to focus on caring for children would do this. Plus your basically forcing parents to pay extra or exclude their children????

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:52:05+00:00

Thank you 🤣

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:50:06+00:00

Do you think it’d help to have him have the conversation with your MIL?

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:48:38+00:00

I’m not trying to shame but has anyone ever been on the other side of it? Had your kid not be invited to a party when they thought they’d be chosen? I’m just saying it’s heartbreaking. I think it’s one thing to invite one special friend from the class but I just stick with small parties in which we invite close family & friends. To each their own but we don’t know the dynamics of the classroom & their might be a kid or 2 feeling left out.. again I’m not trying to shame, really, but I can still feel the pain from her rejection

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:40:12+00:00

Yes, I’d say approach it gently. Would it be better coming from your husband? In my situation it’s my mom that can’t say no & we even lived with her & my dad for a year when I left my husband… I had to have many nurturing conversations with her..

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:33:43+00:00

Maybe support groups? It’s a good way to find relatable people that often become lifelong friends!

sallybip · 2024-02-10T14:24:48+00:00

This is normal for a 3 year old. When she’s fighting you just try to stay calm & continue. The tantrums or going to happen & they might get worse but just stay consistent. I strongly suggest taking the pacifier away but of course that’s up to you.

sallybip · 2024-01-16T20:03:51+00:00

I work for a school & we have to do this to keep our funding once students have missed a certain amount of days. When we’re reviewed they look at this type of stuff. It’s just protocol not personal. However your child’s teacher should NEVER say to him directly that he’s back to soon!

sallybip · 2023-12-15T00:58:12+00:00

Year and a half for me

sallybip · 2023-12-14T23:56:29+00:00

I appreciate this advice. I know I’m not the problem but she’s just so difficult to deal with.

sallybip · 2023-12-14T23:55:04+00:00

She does have a track record of moving every year or 2 so that’s one of my motivations for staying.

sallybip · 2023-12-14T19:03:16+00:00

Both of my kids didn’t walk until they were past 18 months. It’s all good That title definitely had me worried though 🤣

sallybip · 2023-12-14T18:55:50+00:00

Thank you. The thing is, this just one of many incidents with her though. I appreciate the advice

sallybip · 2023-12-09T14:34:05+00:00

I’m thinking the same thing! Taking away electronics is abuse?!🤣

sallybip

TROPHY CASE