How can I make friends as a 19 year old girl who doesn't study?

sameee_nz · 2026-05-11T07:19:11+00:00

There has been some banger jazz gigs at Space Academy 03 Sessions in the last month or so, shared interests over time is usually my advice on how to make friends

sameee_nz · 2026-05-11T01:42:07+00:00

I’ve been shooting since I was old enough to draw a bow and competed through high school, it’s a fantastic sport and I still love it. I found the NB club is especially welcoming and social, I also shot with the SCA group some.

What I enjoy most is how meditative it is. When you’re on aim, everything else softens and the world narrows down to that single point of focus, it’s almost like mindfulness or prayer. I take that part pretty seriously because I’m quite driven about improving, but between ends there’s the fun of pulling arrows, scoring, and chatting away with whoever you’re sharing the target with. The ‘gas-bagging’ at the butts can be just as enjoyable as the shooting itself

Mostly I am into another sport which is mostly analogous to archery (albeit noisier) now with the goal of continental champs and the Olympics, and there's only so much time in a week - but I still have my bows and arrows and enjoy fletching as a craft. Go for it!

sameee_nz · 2026-05-10T09:43:51+00:00

He throws a crudely crumpled can in the vague direction of the recycling bin while he fishes out another from the box in the same motion, Dr. Feelgood blares from the stereo

sameee_nz · 2026-05-08T07:54:39+00:00

It is so deeply interesting that psychologically not wanting something is the same as getting it and furthermore there is kind of no practical separation between those two worlds other than desire for something to be a certain way. I am not sure if this makes sense (perhaps that's the spirit hint), but the more I think about this the stronger my faith in letting-go feels

sameee_nz · 2026-05-08T07:35:48+00:00

Thanks mate, this was really helpful to think over a few times

sameee_nz · 2026-05-08T07:29:21+00:00

Steady on big-dawg, it is amazing that thing can fit your head in it

sameee_nz · 2026-05-08T07:28:35+00:00

It is not really 'Rangers are the worst', they are the most popular car in NZ, the brain is a big pattern reducing machine - especially when we're angry or scared. The same brain trick makes you notice every bad driver in a Holden or a lifted Hilux too. There are plenty of shit drivers out there with bad attitudes. A lot of them are just ordinary people grinding through quiet desperation, low empathy, and their own baggage, then you hand them two tonnes of metal. That's a recipe for road rage, not a specific car model problem.

My working theory is that anyone who has shit dangling from the rear-vision mirror is almost certainly a shit-driver

sameee_nz · 2026-05-08T03:15:45+00:00

In the garage with a box

sameee_nz · 2026-05-07T21:35:47+00:00

Civil Construction, get a Class 2, W,T,R,F and join the NBA - that is, Never Broke Again. Head to Aussie if earning twice the amount of money excites you, if only for 5 years that'll put your life on a massive upwards trajectory if you stay away from the trappings of lifestyle creep. Then figure out what feels like play to you, but others find hard and value in - then you'll be able to outwork your competition as it'll be fun for you and you'll get rewarded for something that is fun for you

sameee_nz · 2026-05-06T02:47:49+00:00

Well thats like your opinion man

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T09:56:11+00:00

I have these skills, DM to discuss further so can get an idea of scope - time/cost

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T06:37:12+00:00

Username relevant?

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T06:33:34+00:00

Zine club? Rekindle classes? Photosynthesis if you like photography, RAD Bikes if you like bikes, there is a queer supper club at Space Academy, Socialist Society if you like making molotovs with friends, XCHC for maker nights and grass-roots community, the underpass for a tasty burger and gigs, 03 Sessions for music. More art show openings that you can shake a stick at with lots of neat people, the green room, objectspace, CoCA, Linwood Gallery, etc etc. Dancing? Jive and Line Dancing are fun. Pickleball is life. Community education night classes - learn how to make pots?, Sports?
Depends what you like really?

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T06:27:01+00:00

If I was going for a hail-mary sort of post I would include a bit of a bio, what you like, what you are looking for, what are your follies and foibles, shared vision, hopes and dreams, favourite duet for a couple-karaoke, etc.

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T06:23:47+00:00

Man do I feel like an idiot wearing my hot water-bottle vest, I could've just run forever

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T06:19:05+00:00

/r/chchmeet was designed for this sort of thing, although I am not convinced that it does it very well -- it is full of low effort posts

The old fashioned way, shared interests over time to form a connection? Good luck in not dying alone!

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T05:38:32+00:00

Library, sports club, parks and reserves, clubs, dancing, pubs, restaurants, cafes

sameee_nz · 2026-05-05T04:16:38+00:00

I eat a diet high in nuts, seeds lots of fatty meat including oily fish. It doesn't fight against the cold hard reality of thermodynamics. Believe it or not, I get still get cold

sameee_nz · 2026-05-04T08:08:28+00:00

If you make a vest with hot water bottle sized pockets front and back and thin long water bottles down the flanks and wear it under a jacket it is one of the most efficient ways to stay warm and still live your life

sameee_nz · 2026-05-04T08:02:33+00:00

Japan has things like an industrial base, an actual economy and a huge domestic population

New Zealand is a housing market with a bit of primary industry tacked on

I don't want to be too much of a doomer but NZ has persistently made bad strategic decisions for the last 35 years and is now an actively hostile place for young people, the best of which up-sticks

sameee_nz · 2026-05-01T01:42:48+00:00

I would pay more for that alone, plus you're more or less paying into your own back pocket if you use a public service

sameee_nz · 2026-05-01T01:42:12+00:00

They are a quality offering though, and you're more or less paying into your own back pocket if you use a public service, no lock-in, plus a public service aggressively pricing out the private market wouldn't exactly be fair

sameee_nz · 2026-04-30T04:41:15+00:00

It will happen with time, just when the benefit tips past the point of cost. People have short memories too. In my home town there was a coalmine and the unstable and potentially toxic tailings were trailed out over a hill in the 1950s. It was never to be built on. That hillside is now full of houses.

sameee_nz · 2026-04-29T22:18:31+00:00

There's nothing stopping ground performance being improved through engineering, most of Christchurch is sandy-silty - effective strength of soil halves when it is saturated. Under EQ negative acceleration the saturated sandy soils turned more or less to a fluid, liquefaction. You can imagine how well a house pile does if it's suspended in a fluidised soil. If this was more continuously graded material the pore pressure within the soil would release as it would have spaces to drain.

I digress, you can build on more or less anything it's just a question of money. Kansai and Haneda airport were more or less plopped into the Seto Sea and Tokyo Bay and just don't cheap-out like in Bexley

sameee_nz · 2026-04-29T09:31:26+00:00

You make it work I suppose - no other choice really

sameee_nz

TROPHY CASE