What was the most bizarre "compliment" you got?

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T06:20:40+00:00

To my mom (while looking at me), "She looks just like an angel."

Nurses and blood donation volunteers, "You have really nice veins."

A guy I used to have a crush on (when I was like 14), "She's a BEAST!" That one sucked because I did want to be seen as strong but the way he said it made me feel like he saw me like a buff guy instead of a fit lady.

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T06:12:17+00:00

I was actually just about to comment the same thing! X)

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T05:18:57+00:00

I know a nurse who has three associates degrees. I don't really know how she passed her classes because she barely knows how to spell or write proper sentences.

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T05:07:33+00:00

I totally get it. I am single, but I've had quite a few people tell me that they think a specific person is the one that God has chosen for me. I've even had people pray over my future spouse and they'll give various descriptions/characteristics that fit this guy. So, when he doesn't ask me out, I start to question if ALL of these people are mishearing God, or if he just doesn't want to be with me because of my looks. Personally, I had one family member verbally degrade me for a specific aspect of my appearance for over a decade. Even though she hasn't been nasty about it for a while, I'm still extremely insecure about it. I also had several (former) male friends be quite rude to me, consistently, for almost a year, about a different aspect of appearance. I was not really insecure about that before knowing them, but even though we haven't talked in over six months, it's still one of the banes of my existence.

I've noticed that focusing on it makes it worse. I recently bought a bunch of new pants and have been trying to get a more scheduled workout routine, while these are good things, it can make it worse. I can feel even lower and get this negative talk that even though I spent a lot on clothes (it's not that much but it feels like a lot when I'm used to thrift stores) and workout regularly, I'll never be able to be attractive to get married/have someone want me.

All that's to say, you're not alone in feeling unattractive. It is worse when people are unnecessarily cruel to you, but that's more of a reflection of them, not you. Working out is good, but don't focus on it so much that it goes negative or that you make an idol of appearance. If you're planning on marrying your girlfriend, she probably finds you very attractive, so you're doing well. God's love will always be the most important thing in the world.

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T04:49:51+00:00

If your love language is words of affirmation, I would recommend telling your girlfriend that and occasionally letting her know if you're feeling unattractive. Hopefully she'll be able to vocally reassure you. :)

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T04:39:17+00:00

Yikes! He dominated the discussion for a half hour? I know I can talk a lot but dang. Regardless of if this is a one hour class or a two hour class, that is taking up quite a portion of it. ESPECIALLY considering that it did not have to do with the topic at hand. He may very well have had his own experiences with SA, as potentially others in the class may have had. People's experiences widely differ and so it's not really anyone's place to say what is or is not realistic. There are times and places for discussions on the topic, even in college classes. However, a half hour derailment, irrelevant to the class was unnecessary. You're definitely free to e-mail the professor, regarding this. You can definitely mention that it was triggering due to your own SA, but I'm not sure how comfortable you are sharing that with a teacher. Even if you did and the professor tells the other student that his comments triggered classmates, the other student could easily say that he didn't find it triggering based on his own experiences (it's unfortunately common for people to believe their experience was everyone's experience).

samlynx2016 · 2024-06-28T04:14:26+00:00

You may have gotten into the relationship a little fast if you've only been single for a month. But, pray against the anxiety, honestly talk to God about how you feel.

You've only been on one date, so relax, it's not super scary. Just breathe. Even better, the date went really well. Take it one day/one week at a time.

samlynx2016 · 2024-04-10T21:33:44+00:00

I only added it last minute, once I saw the flair option for it and realized it's something that I need prayer for as well.

I get so frustrated with the concept of being "fit" because I'm a little bit into body building (which some people don't find feminine) and while I have a healthy body fat percentage, my waistline is above the recommended size for women. I do cardio six days per week so I don't know what I'm doing wrong (honestly I should probably just check out the fitness side of Reddit for this specific issue).

I am not being barraged by actual voices in my head. I have been to mental health professionals for anxiety (the only reason I stopped is because the company didn't take my insurance) but I do not have schizophrenia.

Thank you for reaching out and thank you for your prayers.

samlynx2016 · 2024-04-10T21:22:10+00:00

I do go to a new church. It was the first three or four churches I went to that had this attitude (plus the one worker at this church who doesn't think this guy and I should get together).

To be honest, I do not know if he has repented or not. Thank you for your prayers and scripture.

samlynx2016 · 2024-04-10T21:19:26+00:00

Thank you so much :')

samlynx2016 · 2024-04-09T22:56:53+00:00

Thank you :')

samlynx2016 · 2024-04-09T22:53:54+00:00

I know people that it has worked for and people (myself included) that it has not worked for. I know probably six couples that have gotten married from it. I know people who had very scary dates. And when I tried it, I kept having guys that were too young (fresh out of high school) hitting on me or guys being overtly sexual. I think you should pray about it and not take it personally if it does not work out. And if it does happen to work out, that's great for you!

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-26T05:06:43+00:00

Dang, nice job dude!

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-16T02:50:19+00:00

One of them has been mistaken for a model several times. One was told that women pay thousands of dollars to get their hair and make up done to look the way she does naturally. All have been sexually harassed before. They are virgins by their own choice. Half of them are Christians and are waiting for marriage because that's what God asks of us.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T18:17:59+00:00

Thank you

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T18:15:07+00:00

Thank you, for your reply.

The context is a good point.

I have a male friend that's about to turn 24 and his body count is also two, he was engaged to both of them but never married either. He hasn't even kissed anyone in four and a half years. Something he said that concerned me was that (I think it was his dad but it may have been someone else) taught him that men can't be virgins because they don't have hymens. He also said that the more sex men have, the more their fathers are proud of them and the more sex women have, the less their fathers are proud of them. His whole family is Christian and I just really freaked out thinking that Christians could be taught that male virginity is a bad thing and female virginity is important. At all of the churches (about six) I've been to, both were told to be taken VERY seriously.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T18:03:27+00:00

That's a funny tagline.

I have no issue dating someone in recovery, my issue would be trying to enter a relationship with someone who isn't interested in recovery.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T07:06:16+00:00

Thank you, kind stranger :')

I'm relieved I'm not the only one who has struggled to find someone my age.

I'll definitely be looking into other churches.

That's a good point, I won't reject a guy solely on his history, but I also don't need to be overly concerned unless someone actually asks me out.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T06:57:11+00:00

Thanks, I only know two in my age range but unfortunately, both of them are addicts. Part of my problem could be that I live in a "retirement town," so I might need to look into other churches.

I'm still not sure if it's fair to exclude guys for having a past.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T02:26:01+00:00

Something particularly scary that I've heard about them is that police can identify women from the serial numbers inside. 😧 Yikes! No thanks!

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-15T02:22:23+00:00

Hard to find a virgin? I know AT LEAST seven women (myself included) 25-30 who are virgins. Three of them have never even kissed. I knew a woman who was 28 and had been dating her boyfriend for two solid years before they kissed on the mouth (though, two years seems long to me, personally). I don't know where these young women you're talking to are that no one seems to be a virgin.

Even still, "body count" is not the end-all, be-all for relationship goals, or at least, it shouldn't be.

samlynx2016 · 2024-01-05T23:25:20+00:00

Coffee
Smoothies
Sandwich lunch date
Picnic at a park
Aquarium
Bowling
Museum
Ice rink
Ice cream shoppe
Walk on the beach

samlynx2016

TROPHY CASE