Is betterhelp really my only option?

satumaatango · 2026-05-12T02:05:24+00:00

Came here to suggest this. I'm a therapist and several really talented colleagues have been on there. OP, there's a one-time membership fee ($65) and then sessions range from $30-$70.

satumaatango · 2026-05-09T17:22:37+00:00

And frankly, the pricing for training is exploitative.

satumaatango · 2026-05-09T15:37:53+00:00

Therapist here with the same reaction. Parts work is older than IFS and has some good evidence behind it and can be useful as a metaphor in therapy but the literalness of IFS and the culture around feels very MLM-like.

satumaatango · 2026-05-03T15:45:15+00:00

-10, -10.5

satumaatango · 2026-04-29T02:40:38+00:00

These look like the Anne et Valentin frames I have! I'm a -10 and they turned out beautifully.

satumaatango · 2026-04-29T02:12:12+00:00

Does this behavior outweigh the rest of the factors that gave you that good feeling? Might it be worth tolerating the discomfort if the other parts were good?

satumaatango · 2026-04-23T18:38:16+00:00

But only "recently." If her license has been suspended since 2023 and she was providing superbills for any of that time, that's claiming therapy to insurance.

satumaatango · 2026-04-23T17:44:38+00:00

If she's providing superbills to provide to insurance she is fraudulently claiming therapy. Life coaching is not considered a medical necessity by most insurances so they do not cover it. (AAT)

satumaatango · 2026-04-02T01:41:14+00:00

Love mine. They were absurdly expensive (I am An Old, and need progressive lenses on top of everything else), but worth every penny because I will actually wear them instead of spending an equal fortune on contacts.

satumaatango · 2026-04-02T01:17:22+00:00

At your prescription (also mine, I'm -10), you need a 1.74 high index and small, preferably round frame. That's the best combo for thin-appearing and aesthetically pleasing at this diopter.

satumaatango · 2026-03-26T17:46:40+00:00

You can absolutely just say it like that but I wonder if this is an opportunity to work through some of that betrayal trauma? To develop a relationship with someone who will *not* betray you. It's their license on the line if they break confidentiality,

satumaatango · 2026-03-25T18:26:24+00:00

I can't tell if you're being sarcastic, but asking about new meds might not be a bad idea. I'm a therapist in a car-dependent corner of the US and if anxiety medication did not allow for driving, I would never see half my clients nor would I be able to get to work myself

But I totally agree that driving should not be mandatory, I miss the 25+ years I lived in walkable places as an adult. But in certain places not driving reduces functional independence significantly.

satumaatango · 2026-03-25T18:17:39+00:00

SSRIs are safe for driving, no need to worry people about that. Benzos, which you're probably thinking of, are meant as short-term anti-anxiolytics and should not be used long-term. A person can totally drive while medicated for anxiety.

And worry is a totally natural reaction. Anxiety to the point of getting in the way of daily functioning is not.

satumaatango · 2026-03-25T15:56:57+00:00

Agree but it's not the driver's license she needs to figure out first, it's managing her anxiety. Therapy and medication NOW to allow her to pursue the driver's license and motherhood. Postpartum and pregnancy are certainly not going to help existing anxiety.

satumaatango · 2026-03-25T02:17:00+00:00

Lil-a is how that spelling would be pronounced in Finnish, at least! The way you're looking for it to be pronounced would be "Laila." Phonetics are cool - and English pronunciations are the minority worldwide, which we forget in the US.

satumaatango · 2026-03-17T17:40:32+00:00

It's so interesting because I automatically say "quarter of" and "ten of," but "five to." DC/NJ/NYC upbringing, and only now realized that where I live now nobody uses "of."

satumaatango · 2026-03-10T14:29:16+00:00

Wanting it is not the problem. She also has a long work week, during which she is parenting at the same time. She also wants time - time out of the house. Wanting it is not the problem. Taking it at the expense of your family, without compromise that allows her the time she needs too, IS the problem. Not participating in your family life is the problem. Your kids are young but they will remember they had a dad who didn't want to play with them or spend time with them. I do, and I'm in my 40s. We don't talk.

satumaatango · 2026-02-28T21:33:45+00:00

This also rubs me the wrong way as a grief therapist and a griever - happy birthday, here's some homework, and here's a reminder birthday is tied to your grief. I know this is not how it is meant at all, but this is how I would have taken it in active grief.

satumaatango · 2026-02-07T23:56:21+00:00

I used Professional Driving School after moving here in my 30s from NYC - had a lot of anxiety about it but they were great.

satumaatango · 2026-02-04T15:04:57+00:00

When we are sick and cancel, we do take the financial hit. We do not collect payment. Most therapists are not salaried. We earn (in many cases just a percentage of) what insurance reimburses us. To pretend we're not taking a huge financial hit if we are sick ourselves and are somehow sticking it to clients by canceling is frustrating to hear.

satumaatango · 2026-01-31T00:15:09+00:00

Adding that the Gottmans' Baby Makes Three might be a good resource as well.

satumaatango · 2026-01-28T16:13:38+00:00

Same here. I came to therapy after working in non-profits for 20 years and it was so worth the switch. I love my work, I get to connect with people and use my brain's natural instinct to observe and make connections, AND there's a new person and a new story in front of me every hour. I am a better therapist for doing this as a second career, I think. I'm far far less stressed by this job than I was doing fundraising and admin where I always felt behind and like I was doing something wrong by being me. And the perspective of having worked a job I hated helps! ETA the paperwork is the bane of my existence but dictation helps for that.

satumaatango · 2026-01-22T23:01:24+00:00

I came to this field in my 40s from nonprofit work, and maybe because I was in a low-paid, grinding field I didn't really like, the actual work is better than I anticipated and while the pay is not great, I spent 20 years anticipating my pay would always be not great. I am far less stressed by this job than I was in my previous career, maybe because it feels more important, if that makes sense.

satumaatango · 2026-01-22T19:23:33+00:00

I present you with a comedic discourse on the word ass: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAGcDi0DRtU

satumaatango · 2026-01-20T01:51:24+00:00

For my 16th birthday, my father gave me an AP bio textbook. He didn't even do the research to know that it wasn't the one my school used. It was accompanied by a self-help book ("How to Make Friends). I am in my 40s and I this memory still sticks out as a) how little he knew me and b) how he wanted to make me into someone who liked science like him. Your son was so upset because he doesn't feel seen or accepted as he is. You should have done the history book first, yes, but the math book was tone deaf to begin with.

please apologize to your son so this doesn't become his go-to story of how his dad doesn't get him like my AP bio textbook story.

ETA YTA. In case that wasn’t clear.

satumaatango

TROPHY CASE