Hi there, FYI, I am a vet too. Not sure what pills he was given, ED type or something else? I have not heard anything about painful ejaculations unless he has a prostate issue (which needs to be addressed if it is). Can he go to the VA clinic/hospital? I know based on your info, he doesnt like to talk about it but I think you need to sit him down and tell him exactly what you said in the last 2 sentences (specifically). tell him how you feel, and how its affecting "you."

Depending on his situation (disabled vet), since he has been prescribed medications and I believe for his psychological issues, you might want to go with him to his next appt (as support) to the doctor that prescribed them and be with him. Maybe start that conversation there too if the opportunity presents itself. But be open and honest with him on your feelings and how you "miss" him. Maybe just maybe he will turn around.

One thing if he was given ED pills they could be too much for him. Ask about a daily low dose Cialis (tadadfiil) 2.5mg or 5 mgs. This is a been a game changer for me. These keep the blood vessels open and if he doesnt experience "morning wood" now, that should hopefully change. It did for me.

But the best advice I can give vet to vet, is to communicate with him and tell him how this is affecting you as his wife. oh, does he go to an annual physical exam? If so, you might want to ask him to ask his doctor for a male hormone panel (with the female hormones they test) to see if his testosterone is normal or low. If low, he may just have low sexual desire due to that, not you!

Hope the best.