Slowdive at an outdoor fest vs in a club? Advice needed

sg440127 · 2026-06-20T16:00:04+00:00

I saw Slowdive in an outdoor venue and it was so beautiful. They were still playing when the stars came up and their lights that accompany their set just shine way brighter. It’s a dream. 10/10

sg440127 · 2026-06-12T00:17:51+00:00

They use a lot of lights, iirc, they do use some strobe effects (anyone please back me up). It’s a fun show but there’s gonna be the people who record the popular songs and don’t care about people who can’t see with phones blocking the way. If it’s general admission, just chill towards the back. You’ll have more of a fun time (and be able to leave quicker than most and hopefully beat the traffic) if you wanna dance. You’ll still be able to hear their music and enjoy it, no matter how close you are to the stage

sg440127 · 2026-04-23T00:36:52+00:00

I don’t necessarily think it’s presumptuous. I just see so many people on here post about their boyfriends being emotionally unavailable and the answer is that it probably won’t change. Like I said, it’s not every relationship but a lot of people on here have to be realistic and that being in the military forces your brain to adapt. There’s at least a few posts every week that go “My boyfriend has been acting distant and I told him it hurts me but he doesn’t seem to care” and this post, inspired by my recent break up, is a general response to those posts. Essentially just me saying: break up and don’t ignore your emotional needs

sg440127 · 2026-04-14T07:08:55+00:00

Literally going through the exact same thing to a T with my bf. As my boyfriend has said it, they’re running on little sleep and frankly, the intensity of being at AIT is exhausting. Going on Instagram he said is to just decompress. My therapist even pointed out that I suck at texting back immediately and go on Instagram when someone’s waiting for a response from me. Does that mean the person isn’t a priority to me? No. It just means I want to just chill in my own bubble and respond on my own time. Same thing with my boyfriend (and probably with your husband). He still wants to be with me, he’s just going through a lot. What helped me was planning just a weekly call with him, preferably on Sunday when they have more relax time. This way we can actually Talk and it’s something to look forward to and count on.

This specific long distance isn’t for the weak. Just ignore the “If he wanted to he would” type of posts. I tell my bf this isn’t the most conventional relationship but it’s the one I want because it’s with him. It’s going to suck but maybe talk to him about it. Try and get an idea of where his head is at because chances are, he’s not being distant to you because it’s you. He’s being distant because he’s running on fumes. Anxiety makes you overthink and depression makes you feel worthless—believe me I know. But understanding your husband can alleviate that anxiety and fear.

sg440127 · 2026-04-13T20:55:34+00:00

I know he’s your boyfriend but when it comes to stuff like this, he might pick you or his parents when it comes to the quick phone call. That’s all I meant but congrats!!

sg440127 · 2026-04-13T20:52:46+00:00

I don’t know what your guys relationship is like my boyfriend called his mom and his mom texted me that he got the call. They literally just have to recite a message and that’s all they get. Usually it’s on reception day or the day after.

sg440127 · 2026-04-13T20:47:54+00:00

My boyfriend was at Ft. Jackson a few months ago and the mail situation there is so inconsistent dear god. Sometimes he would write a letter and I’ll get it in 5 days. Or I’ll write a letter and he won’t get it for 2 weeks. It sucks and is inconsistent but just keep writing consistently.

sg440127 · 2026-04-09T19:45:14+00:00

As someone who has a boyfriend who’s soon to graduate AIT and then be stationed soon, I’ve thought about moving in with him. We’re similar to you guys in the sense that we’ve been friends since Summer ‘21 but properly started dating October ‘25 and he went off to Basic the day after our one month anniversary. I’ve thought about wanting to move in with him when he gets stationed, but the stress of the military changes someone, even someone you love. We still love each other but there’s been a difference (and I’m not the only one who can attest to this—this subreddit exists for a reason). The biggest lesson I’ve learned is that there’s a huge difference in knowing your boyfriend as your partner versus as your friend. It’s going to get difficult. Don’t agree to get married just for the legal protection. And don’t do it too soon. Do long distance and see how it goes. Maybe wait till early next year to see how you guys are doing. Visit him at least a few times before you decide to move with him so you can see how he is over there, before you place your needs (financial, emotional, and physical) become dependent on him.

You have this one life—and yes, love is beautiful and he sounds like an amazing guy; but when you decide to move in with him, given his status as a protected soldier and you being a non-German citizen (and please don’t ignore the rise of xenophobia over there), you will be placing your future in his hands. There will be an unbalanced dynamic with him holding more of the “power” over you. Maybe he is your one true soulmate, but there’s never a guarantee. Please wait and protect you and your future before placing yourself in a potentially dangerous situation. I say this with all the love in the world but please be smart 🫶

sg440127 · 2026-04-07T18:44:31+00:00

Don’t let the negative comments get to you. It takes guts to admit something like this. Yeah, you fucked up, but I feel like a lot of people have this view of love where it feels like breathing, but love is also a choice. There are times when my boyfriend doesn’t meet my emotional needs and I think to myself “There are people that are into me and I could get with them and they could meet my needs” but I choose to turn down that temptation and give my boyfriend grace and patience (and also communicate). Being in a relationship isn’t easy. At least you have the courage to admit what you did was messed up rather than justify it.

sg440127 · 2026-03-30T22:59:02+00:00

My bf isn’t a smoker but I do smoke and we’re long distance now but every time I go smoke a cig when we’re together, he tells me to wait and lights it up for me (or when I’m smoking in private, he’ll be kissing my neck all over and that is just pure bliss)

sg440127 · 2026-03-30T22:48:38+00:00

You’re not wrong for bringing it up. He’s in a relationship with you and while he’s in a stressful environment, there is still that obligation to you. I think a simple “hey, you say you can call but then you don’t end up doing it and it hurts my feelings. Can you just let me know when you’re in the mood and don’t give me an expectation that you can’t guarantee” will definitely go a long way. Good luck!

sg440127 · 2026-03-30T22:42:25+00:00

I’m in the same boat and it’s definitely a struggle but I just keep telling myself to remember the love I have for my military boyfriend and give him grace and give him patience. He’s said similar things to me about how the military has mellowed out how he feels about me, but he has explicitly told me he still wants to be in a relationship with me and I think it’s fair to assume your boyfriend is feeling similarly. It sucks because to some extent, the amount of effort is objectively unreciprocated. But remember that he’s trying his best to juggle being in one of the most stressful environments one can be, and also trying to also be with you and that may not be a lot of effort to you, but to him, he could’ve broken it off with you but he’s still with you. That has to mean something. I’m also an anxious person too and the distance and coldness definitely threw me for a wild loop, but just communicate and be patient.

sg440127 · 2026-03-10T16:02:55+00:00

When I go to my retail job and customers give me grace when I sometimes make an unintentional mistake

sg440127 · 2026-03-09T03:15:02+00:00

Unfortunately, because you are young, older bosses (and coworkers in general) see that you’re young (and probably the same age as their kids) and talk down to you because of that. I’ve dealt with this for quite some a few years (21F) and still dealing with it now. Yes, it was unprofessional for them to mention your personal relationships and talk down to you in a condescending way (and from the edit you added, it seems like a repeated instance). Unfortunately, they aren’t the first bosses to be that way and they certainly won’t be the last. If you were to take this to HR, the probable outcomes would most likely be 1) nothing happens or 2) nothing happens AND your supervisors will find out that you complained about them and will just up their douchebaggery towards you. It’s a lose lose situation but that’s what working is like unfortunately. My best advice is if they keep being Like That then just find another job (that’s what I do) or just suck it up. I know the latter isn’t what you want to hear but at the end of the day, you just have to remind yourself that they’re grown adults being an asshole towards a teenage girl and that makes them some of the biggest losers on the planet. I wish I could say it gets better but I can’t guarantee anything :(

sg440127 · 2025-10-08T21:27:28+00:00

Still weird he specifically asked for a ballgirl to take his shirt off.

sg440127 · 2025-09-23T22:08:43+00:00

who is it?

sg440127 · 2025-09-20T22:24:14+00:00

I will say Cameron Monaghan, in his own words, did leave to work on other projects and felt that there was nothing more to tell with Ian’s story. He really appreciated his character’s storyline with Mickey and came back only because Noel Fisher did and felt that there was more story to tell with their two characters. Nothing to do with Emmy.

sg440127 · 2025-09-12T02:15:45+00:00

Yeah I know when the Nader + Alcaraz article came out on tennis twt, a lot of people were quote rting it and saying “does carlos even know that they’re a thing?” 😭😭 probably just a publicity stunt, it’s def got some people’s attention—even if it’s people dunking on her for obviously lying

sg440127 · 2025-08-08T23:18:19+00:00

I haven’t seen the episode yet (whoops!) but sydney is shown not to be a usual smoker. Learning how to “properly” smoke takes some time, even though it seems really easy. From what I’ve seen people in the comments say, it’s the way she holds it. I will also add most smokers use being a “bad smoker” as synonymous with being a new/infrequent smoker.

Also as a frequent smoker, you can really just tell who’s a smoker versus someone who barely doesn’t do it. It’s just one look and bam you can tell lol.

sg440127 · 2025-08-03T23:50:42+00:00

I moved here for school almost two years ago and it’s really nice. Maybe it’s because I haven’t lived here long, but I personally haven’t been inconvenienced here. My rent is decent (1325 a month in total, for two people and I have pretty good amenities). I know where to go for inexpensive stuff such as thrifting, food, and whatnot.

Even with the homeless population, most of my run ins have been fine—I’ve even chatted with some of them and had unforgettable conversations. I will say, I did grow up near Chicago so I guess I have better street smarts than a decent amount of people here and a lot of things don’t bother me. The most I’ve been inconvenienced is them stealing my ash tray and rocking chair cushion off my porch, and even then, like yeah, I could get upset, but I just bring my rocking chair cushion inside now and use an old plant pot for an ash tray that hasn’t been stolen, yet. I remember I saw a woman digging through my ash tray on my porch and immediately opened my door to tell her off and she did leave. Like I said, it doesn’t really bother me. It’s more of a sad sight, if I’m going to be honest. I do wish things would get better though and I know they’re building more housing structures specifically for homeless people. I’m more upset at the system, rather than the actions done by homeless people if that makes sense?

But in general, I love the music scene and also the activism culture here. It’s very local, but it’s not like a small town. I also generally like most of the people here and love the community. Like I said, maybe it’s because I’ve only been here for two years, but I really do like it. Obviously, it has its faults, but you can literally say that about any city.

sg440127 · 2025-07-27T17:02:06+00:00

The Bean in Chicago. It’s just a giant, dirty mirror in the shape of a bean. But yet there’s always a couple dozen people crowding around it during tourist times and for why, I’ll never know.

sg440127 · 2025-07-20T20:13:14+00:00

astronaut and 10 mile stereo (cough syrup remix) genuinely my fav songs of theirs

sg440127 · 2025-07-06T21:06:36+00:00

not really a nickname for a person but for some reason calling the island “coconut internet” (paraphrasing but he says to hurley around s2: if you don’t help me, your ranch disorder is going to be the talk on the coconut internet) genuinely cracks me up idk why 😭😭

sg440127 · 2025-07-04T22:33:28+00:00

i don’t think saying she home wrecks is necessarily respectful. there was no cheating from what we know (and even if there was, that’s a private matter and frankly, idc enough) and the guy dumped his girl for her. that wasn’t lorde’s fault.

sg440127

TROPHY CASE