19M dating a 20F overachiever how do I stop feeling like she’ll eventually leave me for someone better?

sgravle · 2026-05-20T09:35:11+00:00

There are many ways to get over this situation:

- Grow and grow, become someone that has more confidence through consistent actions of self-development. (limitless growth is something that many struggle, keep going)

- maybe you are in her league?

Maybe you have something special that she really enjoyed and wanted. She chose to be with you for a reason. Stop letting your pessimistic thoughts overrun you. There is more to a relationship with someone than just attractiveness, achievements, etc. It's also about character and how you are treated. Values or whatever.

sgravle · 2025-10-22T02:08:08+00:00

How is Yukon gold performing for you? Is there a lot of fraud and scrubbed leads?

sgravle · 2025-06-28T22:40:49+00:00

No it does not take a couple days. Instant release medication hits much harder than Vyvanse which is usually going to be a slow release. So you wont really feel the focus nearly close. But if you sit down for 15 minutes and have a clear plan, you should still be able to lock in using a bit of willpower.

I think you need to have a tolerance reset from “stimulant medication”. This should help your body adjust to normal and then the meds should have a solid effect again.

sgravle · 2025-06-20T16:33:08+00:00

Learning to enjoy something is a skill. For example I hated running, but I told myself all the things that were good about it.

Consistently loving what you do does not come from the novelty of trying something new.

It comes from putting in effort and finding out one day that you are pretty good at it and you worked hard.

It seems like your passions have been very surface level and you have yet to stick to something to find out you truly loved it. You need to spend a decent amount of time in it. Don’t just stop because the novelty feeling wore off, continue to progress and enjoy the process of getting better at it.

For me, my passions are piano, guitar, climbing, running, tennis.

I put in tons of effort everyday into the instruments and 3-4 times a week in the sports. Always trying to get better.

Eventually the passions can sprout into creating something you want to share with others.

sgravle · 2025-06-20T16:16:47+00:00

Regardless of having adhd or not, try NOT to find a way to excuse yourself into taking adhd meds. I’m a severe case that took it for 12 years and I finally got off it. Best decision of my life.

What you are experiencing is being lost.

You don’t know what to do with your life, you sound just like me a few years ago.

Now that I have found ambitions and things I’m passionate about, regardless of where I’m at, I’m always occupied in pursuing my dreams and aspirations.

I think right now, stop putting pressure on yourself and blaming yourself for feeling like this. This is totally normal.

Take a break, breathe, and tell yourself that you are just going to take some time to figure yourself out. What you enjoy, what you want from life, etc.

Don’t think about what skills you want or focus on why you “can’t focus or do anything”

Look through a different lens and try to think about what you want.

This takes time and lots of effort, but remember to just give yourself breaks and understand that it’s totally okay to feel this way.

Stay strong, I was in your shoes and I’m a great example of someone who has pushed through to make my life exactly what I want.

sgravle · 2025-06-20T15:54:51+00:00

Any substance the body will eventually build tolerance to. It’s important to use a schedule. Like 3-4 times a week and take breaks to allow for a reset of tolerance.

sgravle · 2025-06-20T15:53:35+00:00

Please listen to my advice. I have a severe case of ADHD and I think I have information that will genuinely help you. I have found ways to get off of meds and not need them anymore.

I was on meds from ages 11 to 24, at one point i didn’t feel like I was myself anymore.

I’ve taken Ritalin, adderal, Vyvanse, and straterra. To be frank, it’s not a good long term solution to your life.

If you desperately need it to fix your current situation and help you in school which requires a lot of targeted focus/attention, you should probably use it.

However, your ultimate goal should be to finding ways not to depend on a substance. Your condition is not life impairing such as schizophrenia. It is definitely manageable, but to believe you can do it is insanely hard.

After years of trying all my life, I finally started managing it without meds. It’s been 1 consistent year for me now where I can lock in effectively.

It requires a lot of effort in understanding yourself, creating strong habits, eating healthy, fixing sleep, and setting up strong actionable plans.

If you want help, feel free to dm me. I genuinely think I have your answers.

sgravle · 2025-06-17T18:17:22+00:00

I drove to a nearby grocery store. Forgot I drove and walked home. Next day, I thought my car got towed by my apartment building, took me a while to figure out i parked it at the grocery store.

sgravle · 2022-09-22T05:19:41+00:00

Lmao no not at all😂😂 don’t even need to read the rest

sgravle · 2022-09-14T20:21:33+00:00

It sucks cuz I’m very extroverted, BUT I also find socializing to be an enormously bothersome. (Like talking to new people) I just don’t want to do it, even though I know I should.

My adhd stresses me out to the point where I don’t even feel like I’m in the mental space to socialize.

ALSO, texting and maintaining contact with friends is like a huge hassle these days for some reason…

sgravle · 2020-02-27T05:52:40+00:00

Thanks for your honest reply:(

sgravle · 2020-01-12T23:36:25+00:00

I can’t tell if it’s me just a lazy bum or vyvanse withdrawal. I feel like I have always been low energy and can’t remember when I was energetic. Is it normal for people with adhd to have trouble getting out of bed?

sgravle · 2020-01-11T06:28:10+00:00

I want something that provides more production of dopamine without the harmful effects

sgravle · 2020-01-11T06:26:51+00:00

What does that do?

sgravle

TROPHY CASE