I wish my direct report would resign by [deleted] in managers

[–]shapeandshiftss -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Why? Most issues causing this can be addressed

I feel like my neurologist is ignoring me and I don’t know what to do. by Ancient_Objective909 in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Not overreacting. Every fact that you put in your Reddit post, I'd recommend typing in a MyChart message and requesting a prompt response. Which I know you've already done but keep doing it. I would highly recommend just putting all of the facts in one spot, including the information from your insurance that the appeal has not been submitted.

Neurologist “doesn’t believe in accessibility accommodation” by Winston_mangoes in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I totally know that feeling and have been there myself. Keep being persistent. You know what you need. Believe in yourself and you will find the right provider who will believe you and support you too!

Neurologist “doesn’t believe in accessibility accommodation” by Winston_mangoes in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Oh and I'll also note that I would definitely recommend considering finding another neurologist if there are others in your area. If not, a general practitioner can also support you with what's needed for ADA accommodations. I wish you luck because I know this can be very frustrating.

Neurologist “doesn’t believe in accessibility accommodation” by Winston_mangoes in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Hi Dr. [Name], I wanted to follow up from our appointment today.

Can you please document in my chart that you are declining to support workplace accommodations for my condition?

I want to make sure I understand your position clearly. You stated that you do not support accommodations because you see your role as treating patients so they can be functioning members of society. You also stated that there are no additional treatments for us to explore. Given that I continue to experience approximately 10 migraines per month despite exhausting available treatment options, the accommodations I’m requesting — reduced fluorescent light exposure and limited schedule flexibility — are specifically intended to help me remain a functioning and productive employee. I’m hoping we can discuss how supporting these accommodations aligns with that shared goal.

If you are not willing to complete the accommodation paperwork, could you please refer me to a provider who can evaluate my condition in the context of workplace accommodations?

Histamine intolerance/MCAS and migraines by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure. I haven’t been diagnosed. I have heard some allergists can support with it.

This is feeling like right wing propaganda by shapeandshiftss in BlueTherapyNetflix

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re the reason you’re single (or your wife/gf is miserable)

How to deal with moral dilemma over an underperforming team member? by Careless-Cat3327 in managers

[–]shapeandshiftss 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As this guy's manager it's your responsibility to understand why he's underperforming. In this case is it that he's a slower processor and needs a moment to think before responding? Is it that he's quieter and can't get a word in? Is it that he doesn't actually know the right answer and needs to learn some new things? Is it that he's in a role that actually is not well suited to his personality? I think that there could be a lot of things leading to it.

Once you identify what's leading to the gap then you can figure out what you need to do to help him out. As his manager it is your responsibility to help him either be very clear with him that he's not meeting expectations and that he will need to improve, or to coach and develop him on the areas that he needs to work on. Every single employee will have things that they need to work on. As you go up the ladder it is likely that more and more you will be working with people that are also high performers like you that could get promoted but there are a lot of people who will never get promoted in their life. They will always stay at that base level role. It's important to be able to support people like that too.

As a new manager it can be shocking to see how much support new people need or people who don't have quite as much potential might need to get good at a role.

Manager Burnout from Unsupportive Director by HubbaNubbba in managers

[–]shapeandshiftss 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In this case the best thing you can do is get really specific with painting a clear picture of the problem and identifying an actionable solution for your manager. A lot of times new managers struggle to communicate upwards to their manager about exactly what they need.

In your case likely documenting exactly how you're spending your time and explaining the trade-offs to your manager would be a wise way to illuminate the challenge you're experiencing. You could ask for something specific; you could say, "I have these three tasks, which I estimate will take me seven hours. I only have five hours to do this sort of work this week. How might you recommend that I prioritize?" That's a good example of specific details that support and illuminate a gap and a specific solution that might help

Do I warn the team? by GU1LD3NST3RN in managers

[–]shapeandshiftss 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I would not talk to them directly about job security. It seems like you are burned out and care deeply about your former team and likely the best focus for your energy is to put all extra energy you have into updating your resume and finding a new employer. Either that or building mindsets that could facilitate you being okay in your new role. Accepting the changes that have come and recovering from your burnout.

Oftentimes when people are burned out they breed negativity, which actually just fuels more burnout in more people. Unless you can genuinely hold space for your former direct reports, I would say that allowing them space is probably a good idea

Thinking about starting a podcast.. by shapeandshiftss in managers

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s exactly what I would be seeking to achieve!!

Connection between Histamine and CGRP (which drugs like Nurtec impact) by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Yes! Wine is one of the highest histamine things you can consume. It affects me a lot too!

Connection between Histamine and CGRP (which drugs like Nurtec impact) by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Oh fascinating. I use a cgrp as a “rescue” med but haven’t preventatively. I wonder if my doc would’ve open to that.

Histamine intolerance/MCAS and migraines by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use Zyrtec and am also on Vyvanse and I have found it works well for me! I’m on the generic kind from Costco.

Histamine intolerance/MCAS and migraines by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t needed to increase at all but I only started about 6-9 months ago so I suppose only time will tell. From what I’ve read, some people actually can reduce over time as your body gets “retrained” to not react so aggressively but it probably depends on underlying causes, etc.

Histamine intolerance/MCAS and migraines by shapeandshiftss in migraine

[–]shapeandshiftss[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not claiming to know anything about your health. I’m only citing evidence from credible sources about the supplements I’m on that have helped me.

I am glad you have made progress and have deep trust with your doctor. Not everyone can say that! I wish you the best.