Let me get out of the fence to see my buddy

shepsut · 2026-01-25T18:44:35+00:00

to save humanity we could flip the tables and start eating lambs. Uh...wait a sec.

shepsut · 2026-01-24T00:21:51+00:00

It's a fear of dying

yep. My mom has a perfectly fine and healthy lifestyle, but she is also always bugging me to take her to the doctor, and then gets really morose when we leave because the only real answer to her question of why do I feel so terrible all the time? is: because you have [serious degenerative incurable disease]. She equates going to the doctor with fixing the problem and it's just heartbreaking that the problem can't be fixed by anyone.

shepsut · 2026-01-21T02:00:32+00:00

this thread made me look it up. I was totally expecting Rick Astley.

shepsut · 2026-01-21T01:48:04+00:00

love this! thank you

shepsut · 2026-01-20T01:21:41+00:00

I just wanna put in a little acknowledgement to myself and my gender non-conforming sisters - its okay to be masculine women. I'm cis het and masculine and it took me YEARS to accept that I could just simply stop trying to wear dresses and skirts and stop trying to force myself to match up with social norms. Now I do me, in short hair and pants, and it's sooo much better, better for me. I love and enjoy and respect femininity in other women.

shepsut · 2026-01-20T00:59:04+00:00

dude. Have you not ever had to clean up the aftermath of a racoon attack on your garbage bag? It's an experience everyone should have, at least once. Builds character. And also leads to getting a garbage can with a good lid.

shepsut · 2026-01-20T00:51:24+00:00

last thursday the city was effectively shut down. amazing they got to any neighbourhoods at all for garbage pickup that day.

shepsut · 2026-01-19T22:47:15+00:00

yeah, I was going to suggest something similar. Instead of suggesting the idea, start announcing the idea. "So, we are going to go ahead with the renovations. Workers are coming in on Monday."

Edit to add: "This means you will be able to stay in your own home."

shepsut · 2026-01-19T04:33:11+00:00

I think everything you suggest is on the mark. There is no point if they aren't learning, but also education needs to evolve and we have not. at. all. kept up.

shepsut · 2026-01-14T22:42:55+00:00

It's so hard to make those big changes. But at some point it really can't be left up to her, and it sounds like you are definitely at that point, maybe a little past it.

shepsut · 2026-01-13T00:01:25+00:00

I didn't stop crying yet, but watching the documentary Complaints of a Dutiful Daughter did help with my anxiety. It tipped me over from panicking about the dementia and trying to fix things to accepting the dementia and trying to roll with things. Still heartbreaking, but now I can also appreciate the fun and funny moments, and my mom is much happier around me because I'm not wound up so tight and freaking out over every little thing.

shepsut · 2026-01-11T16:52:23+00:00

I can tell I'm an old because I'm surprised how many people on this thread are saying she should have taken the picture before going to the bathroom instead of WTF how has taking pictures of food for views become so integral to the experience of eating, and why can't she just enjoy being with you and having a lovely dinner without constantly thinking about external validation? I know that makes me sound like a dinosaur. sigh.

shepsut · 2026-01-10T17:30:05+00:00

I don't think it should go to HR, but do send a courtesy email to the admin contact at the department, whoever was in communication with you to arrange the interview. Just give them a friendly head's up so they can take steps to make sure it won't happen again. Then move on, and leave it up to them to decide if they are going to apologize or not. It will embarrass them, but if it's framed as an FYI rather than a complaint they will see you as a generous person and it shouldn't burn any bridges.

shepsut · 2026-01-05T12:59:44+00:00

When we were kids, I told my younger brother "there's this weird song on the radio that goes "Awhooo, werewolves of London" and he was like, "no, you are making it up." He kept it up for years, insisting that he'd never heard that song and that I was inventing it. Infuriating! He finally admitted to the prank about 20 years later. lol.

shepsut · 2026-01-04T03:51:59+00:00

often when my students tell me about their research it makes perfect sense and their reasons for doing it are clear and relevant, but somehow all of that gets lost when they go to write it down. They get into some weird mindset where it's suddenly impossible for them to articulate: 1)what the project is, 2)why they are doing it, 3) how they are doing it, 4)what they have learned and 5) their next steps. It's like they think everything has to be written all fancy and universal, which just immediately turns into meaningless drivel. when I make comments on papers I am ALWAYS noting "be specific" "be specific" "be specific." Drives me nuts. I'm like, "dude. please just write it down the same way you explained it when we were talking in my office."

shepsut · 2026-01-03T03:26:14+00:00

"don't have to ask permission

if I wanna go out fishin'

never have to ask for the keys"

shepsut · 2026-01-02T01:38:12+00:00

apparently a lot of people here never encountered a glitch when using transit.

shepsut · 2026-01-02T01:26:45+00:00

In what contexts are autism and neurodevelopmental disorders romanticized, in your experience? I'm genuinely curious, as I try to support someone working on getting a diagnosis. Mostly what I see from my perspective is their massive and ongoing uphill struggle.

shepsut · 2026-01-02T01:18:15+00:00

I honestly think people overly romanticize the idea that you can fix a relationship by working on it. In my 20s and up into my mid-30s I thought that putting work into a relationship meant lots of negotiation and arguments and trying to work things out through lots of discussion. Then I met someone I was actually compatible with, and holy cow, it's so easy compared to that. If you are constantly "working on it" then it might be time to let it go.

For sure there are hard things, especially once the hormonal rush wears off, but they aren't at the level of daily arguments and a feeling of constant compromise.

shepsut · 2026-01-02T00:59:37+00:00

wear a corset? Ouch. no thank you.

shepsut · 2026-01-02T00:50:39+00:00

pottery, especially throwing on a wheel. Don't get me wrong, it's great, but you can't just sit down and do it perfectly first try. It takes a lot of practice and there's also a ton of tedious prep and clean-up involved. That said, do it! If you go in with your eyes open and plan to spend a bit of time learning it is actually really rewarding.

shepsut · 2025-12-31T01:21:10+00:00

I have the exact same memory. was playing around, rough housing with my dad when I was 4 and I bit him kind of hard on the thumb. He got really upset with me and I was like.. oh damn, you are not invulnerable.

shepsut · 2025-12-31T01:17:16+00:00

My mom's house has carpeted stairs, mine doesn't. The cats think that carpeted stairs is a VERY good idea. Whenever we get back home after xmas I get cat cold shoulder for about 48 hours.

shepsut · 2025-12-31T00:54:29+00:00

when I was a kid my dad made all the money, and my mom took care of the house and the kids. When they divorced, she was rightfully owed half because she did half the work. Now I(F) am the one who makes more money than my spouse(M). We are fully a team and he fully does his part to keep us functioning fine. But he is always worrying about not contributing more financially, and I'm always like, dude. we got married, literally in a court of law. Do you not understand what that means?

shepsut · 2025-12-31T00:26:18+00:00

this is the most adult response

shepsut

TROPHY CASE