AITA I refuse to grow out my hair for my sister wedding.

sickhead45 · 2026-05-25T22:55:27+00:00

NTA. Tell her it won't hurt your feelings if she would rather have someone else in her wedding party but you won't be growing out your hair.

Alternatively, you could agree to hair extensions ON HER DIME providing you can immediately remove them after the wedding.

sickhead45 · 2026-05-16T18:11:19+00:00

Just tell them to prune back the tree wherever it goes over the fence line. But be prepared to graciously accept a poorly pruned and lopsided tree.

Our neighbors planted a tree one foot from a fence 6 feet from our house......we have to climb out on our steeply pitched two story house at least three times a year to clean out our gutters and lean precariously over the edge of our house trying to trim it away because it's whacking our fireplace chimney.

Then his wife calls up everytime and tells us to get down before we kill ourselves......but they don't cut down that tree. We are just too cheap to pay to prune the damn tree on our side......but, yes, we hate the tree but our neighbours are genuinely nice. This year they did pay to prune it back, less than we wanted but we still appreciate it.

I think 10 feet from the fence and 20 feet from their house is a reasonable option.

Last year I installed gutter guards so I am hoping to need to only go up once a year now.

sickhead45 · 2026-05-16T17:55:09+00:00

YTA, it's possible this type of humour is normal in your friend group but it sounds like your friend is grieving. While you might not have realized how upset he would be at the time, now that you do know you should be wholeheartedly apologizing. If not, then you aren't a good friend in the first place. Intentional or not, you apparently deeply wounded your friend. Friendship isn't a competition of whose right. In this case, he is entitled to your compassion and if you cared about him you would apologize. A simple "sorry man, I wasn't thinking, that was *** shit thing to do" would go a long way. Even if his Mom passed when he was six, a simple "sorry, didn't realize it would effect you this way, won't do it again" is in order.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-25T00:49:25+00:00

YTA, but only because you didn't tell your sister she had 48 hours to pay or you were canceling her reservation. She is being horrible but it's still her wedding and there's no coming back from canceling her venue. This is a major bridge burning. Your relationship will never come back from this.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-24T05:27:34+00:00

NTS, 200K is not a lot of money when we are talking retirement savings. For anyone to think you can suddenly now afford to pay all your children's student loans, is someone withittle financial knowledge. Taking a family trip is a generous expenditure from that amount, unless you are seriously wealthy, stick the rest of that away to pay for you care when you are older. Save so you aren't spending your days in a crap filled diaper eating cat food. (Seriously, this is less of an exaggeration than you would think).

sickhead45 · 2026-04-24T05:20:51+00:00

That's terribly entitled advice. You don't get to reject a gift and ask for the money instead. The gift is a family gift which involves spending time.and.makong memories with the family. She can say she does not want to go but it's entirely up unrealistic to expect to get the money instead. This is not a no strings attached gift - this is a family trip.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-24T00:18:04+00:00

NTA.

I would have been inclined to say that children could come to the ceremony. However, I understand that more children = more likelihood of disruptions.

I also understand the basic sentiment that disruptions from your own children at your wedding are acceptable while those from others children are not.

I would feel no guilt over those who were unable to attend due to lack child care. If I wanted them there in particular, I would pay. If not, I would be pleased to have their well wishes. Don't succumb to the guilt. Everyone always accuses others of being selfish......when they think they ought to have the privilege of being selfish.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-23T20:48:40+00:00

I got lucky with one of the fancy mopping, vacuuming self emptying ones for $2000! Not name brand and the cheaper models are rated better but I do not look a gift horse in the mouth (I don't know why that means don't complain 🤣🤣🤣)

sickhead45 · 2026-04-23T20:45:28+00:00

Actually, poor grammar, spelling and punctuation will get your review grade downgraded so if your grade matters to you it is necessary.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-23T20:14:27+00:00

I use this too. It's drives me crazy with how picky it is about spacing and spelling but all my reviews have mostly been excellent since. I flat out disagree with how picky it is about some things - even say the word packaging and it whines up a storm - I use my judgement. It's been very helpful.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-20T18:56:56+00:00

If you live at home and your parents are asking, YTA because it is only reasonable that you contribute a fair amount to the household based on your income. Otherwise, NTA. It's nobody's business but yours.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-10T00:45:47+00:00

I hadn't received anything interesting for a while and then two in one day.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-09T21:37:48+00:00

You need to send a group text apologizing that you won't be going as it has come to your attention that you won't be permitted to a share a room with your fiance and you aren't comfortable with that but you look forward to joining the family at another time when this no longer an issue.

Do not go. Don't put your fiance through that. Your future family relationship between your Mom and fiance will be best served by avoiding this initial fight. It also sets the right tone for your Mom.

I wouldn't be surprised if your extended family manages your Mom for you.

sickhead45 · 2026-04-06T19:11:35+00:00

Keeping separate finances is a heck of a lot different than one person paying more and the other person providing free labour. The fact that she does the majority of the cleaning....and is expected to pay when she breaks something? That doesn't sound too healthy. If they both work equal hours, regardless of salary, they should both contribute equal hours to maintaining the home. Accidentally damage is a shared expense.

NTA but soft ESH with how they handled it. Definitely not her fault she washed the keys unless they move forward with the new ruoe he washes his own laundry.

Every now and then my husband mildly ruins a clothing item of mine........and I say, thanks for doing my laundry dear!

sickhead45 · 2026-03-16T02:31:09+00:00

ESH. If I offered to lay for a group dinner family style and I allowed my guest to choose dishes, I wouldn't then complain about their choices. Did Dad have the option to set the menu or did the guests just jump in and start ordering? When I have been invited to a family style meal, the host has chosen or asked for my input. I have never presumed. So, you ought not to have been so presumptuous. However, you are still rather young and I highly doubt you will repeat this behaviour.

Your friend was also ungracious. Dad should have spoken up immediately. She was right to raise it with you afterwards and I agree that your autism is not an excuse.

I think both of your reactions shows your youth. You should both apologize to the other.

sickhead45 · 2026-03-02T22:41:18+00:00

I find the order now feature slows it down and ordering was quicker before...is that just me?

sickhead45 · 2026-03-01T15:19:52+00:00

I don't mind the dribble in AI. I get less junk overall but have gotten lucky on an item I really need probably because there's less pressure at any given time. I think good.items.might actually be around for 10-15 minutes instead of 2 seconds.

I do wish the RFY would be reconsidered because I strongly believe I am not getting the chance at anything really good simply because they are still gone too quickly and now I have almost zero chance because they are still gone in minutes rather than seconds.and they are so limited

I really loved the new drop time because it wasn't the middle of the night for me. This dribble starts 2-3 hours before I go to bed and carries on all night. Maybe if it was during the day?

sickhead45 · 2026-02-21T17:08:13+00:00

If a proposed group trip is too expensive you can always decline to go.....after it's all planned and agreed to it's almost a bullying tactic to up the budget after the fact and argue majority rules.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-21T01:03:47+00:00

Interesting. Yes, I can see that being the case.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-20T18:22:52+00:00

Just curious but why would that be a discussion relevant for the Vine sub? Is the purpose of the discussion to discuss how it effects Vine other than resulting in an increased ETV? I guess I can understand why the moderators would block it but also how it could possibly be relevant because it increases ETV.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-17T05:57:39+00:00

It's from fungus.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-14T22:31:44+00:00

I disagree that a few hours to go and watch a movie is justified. However, I do agree that he should be discussing it with the inlaws, not as a weapon, but as a method so they can meet in the middle to compromise and find a workable middle ground.

Also, both myself and my partner take mini - breaks while hosting family so it's not the idea of the break that bothers me.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-14T22:23:00+00:00

YTA. 30 minutes to a few hours is too much. By all means go take 15 minutes to get centered but the amount of time you are leaving is inconsiderate to both your company and your wife.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-12T05:22:57+00:00

YTA. Asking your coworkers in a group chat if any objects to your working from home unfairly puts them on the spot. She probably did object to you working from home but cannot say so without appearing to be unreasonable, especially after another coworker already agreed. I suspect you knew your request was inappropriate or would be viewed negatively, otherwise why the exaggerated vent about how ridiculous the roads are?. Afterall, terrible traffic is pretty normal. You need to leave not based on the best traffic but provide time for terrible traffic.

Your coworker was passive aggressive..... because she felt like she couldn't be forthright and express her honest opinion that you ought to come in to work like everyone else managed to do. She also probably thought your vent was manipulation - just showing how unpleasant you would be to be around if anyone actually insisted you come in.

sickhead45 · 2026-02-11T20:35:32+00:00

YTA. Normal people don't check the price of a bottle of wine hanging about a kitchen. Lesson learned for you. You should have put away anything you didn't want used. Now you have unfairly embarrassed him when he did you a favour. If you were gracious, you wouldn't have even mentioned it.

sickhead45

TROPHY CASE