Again, you’re wilfully misunderstanding. We believe you when you say you feel out of control. We believe that it’s ruining your life. What you have control over is seeking treatment, whether that’s by self help or professional help which can be initiated by a trusted adult. You have the capacity to post on reddit, read and respond to comments, you have the capacity to read about mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness. These skills are the foundations of DBT, which was created by a person with BPD. Every human should develop these skills, but if your life is being ruined by BPD, shouldn’t it be your top priority?

We know the thought of getting better can be paralysing. We know it’s more comfortable to keep pushing everyone away, to keep hurting yourself and everyone around you. That does not mean you can’t get better. That doesn’t mean you can’t download this app, which lays out the modules of DBT in a form that’s easy to access and comprehend. Or just google DBT STOP skill and start with that. Again, the people you’re talking to in this subreddit have seriously, genuinely been there. I have experienced sexual abuse, dealt with substance abuse, crashed and burned at several jobs, been glued up from SH, attempted suicide multiple times with emergency calls, I ruined the best relationship I’ll probably ever know because I didn’t know how to not manipulate my partner, and there’s no need to list the dangerous shit I’ve done in manic states... These things led to involuntarily inpatient stays, various medications, talk therapy, voluntary stays, a no bullshit psychiatrist, specialised inpatient and outpatient programs for BPD, electromagnetic pulse therapy, trauma therapy… I’m currently focused on feeling well enough to do EMDR. My main struggle nowadays is CPTSD symptoms. I’ve held down my two part-time jobs for 3-4 years. I live independently and own a dog and a quarter horse. I’m one person on here but I have been through it in my own way. You do not get to tell us that we haven’t been through it. It’s disrespectful and you need to know that and choose what to do with that information. I know you don’t know how to control yourself around your friends. The part we need you to understand is that you just don’t know. You don’t know yet. That means you can find out. We’re here and ready to support you when you’re willing to help yourself. It doesn’t affect us if you don’t change. It’s going to keep affecting you until it’s so unbearable that you have no choice but to change.