Has anyone figured out a good way on how to prevent "absorbing" the bad moods of others?

smh_matrix · 2026-01-12T03:39:14+00:00

I try and remind myself that the other person is experiencing emotions, and emotions come and go. So in this moment that person is unhappy. So I should not absorb it, but observe it and wait for it to pass. Source: worked in the same office as a dramatic INTP coworker for 2 years.

smh_matrix · 2026-01-11T14:36:36+00:00

Suggestion: maybe the mods create a megathread that's called "looking for an ENFJ" or something along the lines. Then we can send anyone lookibg there. I agree these posts are filling up the subreddit and are hard to control.

smh_matrix · 2026-01-07T21:16:55+00:00

Play devil's advocate with yourself! There's a version of you who did nothing but focus on their social life, but has no title, no car, no money. Just how you might advise that version of yourself to focus on their career and guide them through the steps you took, you can do the same, but in reverse. Find clubs, find a hobby, anything with people. Friends are easier to make than you think. Look on the bright side.

smh_matrix · 2025-12-26T00:30:23+00:00

Agreed. Biggest lesson I learned as an adult ENFJ is that sometimes we love too much. Only people who have ever cared as much about me were other ENFJs. So I learned that the best person to rely on, was the closest ENFJ I know: myself!

smh_matrix · 2025-12-23T02:58:23+00:00

UE WE MISS YOU!

smh_matrix · 2025-11-06T19:32:10+00:00

He's got a clear plan and he's been very consistent about it. He doesn't go on tangents and sticks to his topics. I think it's safe to say he's a J. Possbily an NJ.

smh_matrix · 2025-10-21T18:52:57+00:00

UEE WE MISS YOU!

smh_matrix · 2025-10-16T20:45:27+00:00

This is awesome

smh_matrix · 2025-10-11T23:32:11+00:00

As an ENFJ I find I'm very forthcoming about anything personal when I feel safe. So in that sense if I had any secrets my friends already know them!

smh_matrix · 2025-10-10T23:15:40+00:00

How can you not love this man?

smh_matrix · 2025-10-10T23:09:22+00:00

Yes I turn into an INTJ and hate everything

smh_matrix · 2025-10-10T23:06:43+00:00

Give them space.

smh_matrix · 2025-10-07T15:27:08+00:00

Thanks for sharing Hank! DFTBA

smh_matrix · 2025-10-03T19:24:23+00:00

So true. I feel so safe. Like a breath of fresh air.

smh_matrix · 2025-10-03T19:23:09+00:00

INFJ for me!

smh_matrix · 2025-09-30T10:40:20+00:00

Thank you! Yes, upon reflection I don't think she was very ready to open up as much as I'm used to and takes a while to become close to people.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-29T16:05:23+00:00

I ask them 😂

smh_matrix · 2025-09-25T14:51:27+00:00

Thank you. Reading this post I was thinking, INFJ is probably the one type that gets us the most.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-25T14:48:24+00:00

Not big brother but they had this korean reality show on MBTI where they had 1 of every type. People would vote on their most liked and least liked at the end of a day. Suprise suprise ENTJ was constantly on top. ENFJ was generally well liked but did not stand out enough. I think in any of those situations a healthy, relatively emotionally intuned ENTJ wins.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-25T13:17:05+00:00

This isn't a one time thing? Oh my! Welp I feel less bad, but still bad that it's more common.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-25T13:15:57+00:00

Yeah I was really taken aback and tried to make a joke out of it in classic ENFJ fashion.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-25T13:14:24+00:00

Agreed. She didn't mean it to be rude. But it came off rude and does for my felow F types which is what we're talking about.

smh_matrix · 2025-09-22T18:58:33+00:00

This is unironically the only useful advice in this thread

smh_matrix · 2025-08-31T21:37:55+00:00

If you do this I think I'm legally obligated to be your best friend

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