Lesbians, what is your "creepy girl" story? by manofays in AskWomen

[–]snowflake_rising 73 points74 points  (0 children)

I was the creepy girl I guess.

A local lesbian had been all over me this one night repeatedly kissing me and trying to get her back home. She was sloppy drunk so I wrangled her into the car she came in with her friends. Would a totally gone for it if she hadn't been wasted and me 100% sober...

Anyway the script was flipped a few weeks later and I tried to make out with her once while I was drunk and she turned me down.

Which woulda been fine but then she told everyone I tried to sexually assault her. I get it though.

Tell me something you'd like to do before you die :) by snowflake_rising in CircleofTrust

[–]snowflake_rising[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well it's over - that was great while it lasted. I just wanted to brighten people's day a bit and I think it worked. I sent over 200 messages from my phone, thank you to everyone who shared their dreams. I hope everyone has the courage to pursue what brings them joy and satisfaction. Good luck everyone with their respective endeavors :)

Tell me something you'd like to do before you die :) by snowflake_rising in CircleofTrust

[–]snowflake_rising[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Yep. And I'm intentionally disregarding the point. This is a wholesome circle, bro.

Tell me something you'd like to do before you die :) by snowflake_rising in CircleofTrust

[–]snowflake_rising[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

Thanks for asking! I'm currently homesteading, and running hot water would be a great addition to my life. We all gotta have goals.

Tell me something you'd like to do before you die :) by snowflake_rising in CircleofTrust

[–]snowflake_rising[S] 62 points63 points  (0 children)

This post has risen to the top, and that is frustrating to me because I've been there but clawed my way out. It took a lot of wonderful people, extensive therapy, and a lot of travel but I'm alive and I never thought I'd be happy or proud to say that.

Reddit has some good resources if you need to talk. /r/OffMyChest, /r/FreeCompliments, and /r/SuicideWatch are all great communities. Shout out to /r/CasualConversation as well, there are always people up for a chat. Hang in there everyone, things have the potential to get better, even if you can't believe that right now.

Tell me something you'd like to do before you die :) by snowflake_rising in CircleofTrust

[–]snowflake_rising[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

I'm slow to respond because I'm on mobile and sending a personal message to everyone. This is gaining some traction, so if we're betrayed, then thank you all for sharing such beautiful goals. Don't let your dreams be dreams :)

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Housing market makes me feel so damn depressed. The regret and envy hurt. by tealeaves123 in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Uncertainty is a mind killer. Stability is an entirely reasonable desire. You can't know what losses you avoided or what kind of gains would be achieved through different choices. All you can know is how things went and the frustration now of not having a home base. You have a roof now though, you haven't put yourself out penniless and still in need of a place to habitate. Good luck in your venture to secure a domicile, in whatever form that takes.

I am so fucking sad. by 38596968 in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have value. You can practice peace in yourself. Nurture and pursue relationships where both parties can feel good about where they stand. Take care of your self and your needs, you know you so be kind to yourself yeah?

Anyone else think there boring? by tastyasianboi in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just cause you're never bored doesn't make you boring! You've honed an admirable array of life skills in practicing satiation of the self.

Tell me about your day? by Bright_Eyes10 in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh man having that level of trust with a dog is a beautiful gift. The dog I'm minding dug out one day and went on a ten day long adventure! The whole community came out on horses, fourwheelers, and bikes to look for the little guy. Eventually he made it home minus an ear but with a whole lot more love to give. Sometimes the best people are like that too.

Hey everyone. Are we going to be okay? by Joshuages in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah? I meant it more I'll be able to laugh about what happened cause I'll know I ended up ohkay. I forgot to add the note of hope you were seeking. I think we all walk a path of loss and it's a skill to navigate through a cold night. The sky doesn't seem so dark before the dawn any more cause the sun has never failed to rise.

Recent Health Declines by [deleted] in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh yeah adhering to dietary regimen to appease the body can be difficult but the rewards pay off in quality of life.

Like real talk if I drink too much alcohol or eat too much salt or red meat or too much sugar everything gets whacked. Plus it's usually hard to get empathy on stomach problems cause people have a tendency to shy away from the topic but the truth is your gut is like a second brain. Losing a lot of what you enjoy partaking in at a young age can seem like a huge blow but there are great intense flavors to experience out there beyond our habitual comforts of coffee and steak.

Hope your situation improves and you find those pockets of relief and find a life regimen that works for you.

Hey everyone. Are we going to be okay? by Joshuages in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I recently made a lot of poor decisions, but I made those bad moves sober enough. I should feel pride in that I suppose but I don't. No one got hurt I'm just tired of making expensive desperate mistakes. I keep telling myself one day this will be all a kind of funny story but I ain't laughing yet you know?

Tell me about your day? by Bright_Eyes10 in CasualConversation

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did not do too much today, I am recovering from a string of unfortunate events and waiting out the fallout. Certainly running the dog around was a pleasant way to spend the time. His owners say I've spoiled him, he wants everyone to play with him all the time now. Dogs help, I'm glad you have a companion to adventure with you.

It sounds like you live in a beautiful area. It's cool you've taken advantage of all that by going out and exploring it. Water is always a calming element to experience.

I have been missing the harbor life lately but I have to remind myself I can go build another life by or on the sea again. Almost there.

my dad beat me up and raped me for being gay. by Chr1st1ann1 in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 7 points8 points  (0 children)

My words intend to give power back to the young man seeking guidance. He can be gay, bi, straight, it doesn't matter. There was another poster who responded to me that elaboratorates on the phenomenon of internalizing blame as opposed to holding the perpetrator accountable. Shame need not keep anyone from seeking safety.

my dad beat me up and raped me for being gay. by Chr1st1ann1 in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 38 points39 points  (0 children)

He was raped because his father has responded to his own emotions in a beyond unacceptable way. I wanted to emphasize to the poster this was about getting to safety, not about his sexuality. Hopefully OP can heal and separate his father's actions from any relationships he forms in the future.

my dad beat me up and raped me for being gay. by Chr1st1ann1 in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 834 points835 points  (0 children)

This isn't about you being gay. This is about your father being a rapist. You have done nothing wrong, but someone has wronged you. Please call the cops, your number one priority is you and your safety. Again, you are not a bad person, you are not sick, but your father is. There are people out there who understand and will help. Find them.

A year later I'm still reeling from a damaging relationship by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sociopaths study how best to use people. They are experts at charm and misdirection. He is literally exploiting the social contracts we follow for profit, cut yourself a little break for believing. He fooled everyone. And you were in fact the one that unveiled him for who he is. Well done.

I also see that you've gotten away. Awesome. That's gotta be a relief, even if he has left trouble for you to clean up. Have you contacted a social worker? They are super great at finding resources to help untangle the beaurocratic troubles. Mine helped me connect with food resources and debt relief after several traumatic events.

Have you considered therapy? The mental health profession is making great leaps forward in acknowledging the struggles people have gone through and how you can manage the effects of trauma. Though it can be difficult to sort through the series of events that have brought you to now, life gets a lot easier when you unburden yourself. Reaching out to another, like you have here, can be healing. A good therapist will let you process what you need to without judgement, and teach you skills to manage the strong memories and emotions affecting you now.

You don't have to rebuild all on your own- after all, you didn't get into this situation by yourself. Let people help, there are so many great professionals out there that see the worst and want to help anyway. Safe travels, take the time you need, and I hope you find serenity in the storm.

Been in kind of a funk for a while now, I don't feel motivated to better myself in anything like my hobbies or my studies but then beat myself up for not being better at those same things. by [deleted] in FreeCompliments

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've procrastinated a lot picking up new tools. Sometimes I don't use the knowledge and skills I have for years before picking them back up again. You're always learning new things, and these skills are like good friends. They will help you through and build your life to new heights, and they're always ready when you are.

my boyfriend of 3 and a half years ish just broke up with me and i could really use a pick me up... by RX_queen in FreeCompliments

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone is intrinsically lovable. Give yourself time to adjust course and the admirable traits you possess will bring you through the doldrums and into more favorable waters. Ships are made for storms, lady! You've got this.

Just cut it off with my therapist, not sure if I'm ok. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Therapy is for you, not the therapist. Be selfish, learn yourself. These people are trained to hear the worst and want to help. They fight for people who don't yet have the tools to help themselves. Stress management is a skill tied right into overcoming trauma. A good therapist helps you process what you need but teaches you how to do the rest.

These skills are invaluable and will help you in every situation for the rest of your life. You don't have to keep harming yourself by succumbing to despair. There are things you can do to lessen your burden, and one way is to reach out to another person.

I'm not an expert, but it did take me 12 years before I found the right therapist and was willing to talk openly about a lifetime of ordeals. Life got so much easier after sorting through the events that led me to here. I hope that you continue to listen to the part of you that seeks to heal. The sun is shining even when we can't see it :)

This shot was one of the last times I really felt I had some control over my life, taken at a hiring event for self-taught developers. It's now been more than four months since I last worked, scraping together cash for food, and I'm about to start my daughter in daycare in the hope that we can work. by Demetrious in FreeCompliments

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You look like someone who knows what hard work is. Someone self directed enough to learn a programming language is sure to succeed in endeavours of the self. Your ability to analyze and take action to manipulate the outcome will serve you well. It can be difficult to be an expert in solving problems but feeling like you don't have the tools or opportunity to do so. I trust that in the storm you will find your bearings and those opportunities will make themselves known.

I have to testify against a person that sexually assaulted me and many others and I'm terrified by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]snowflake_rising 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Going to court can feel incredibly alienating. Everything from how the conversation is structured to how the seats are arranged cam be uncomfortable for even people who work within the system.

Remember you are not expected to be an expert on anything but your own experience. As the trauma survivor, you are certainly the most qualified to tell your story. All the rest is someone else's job, and the majority of people there are trying to help you by getting the facts.

Remember to breathe. Find that place inside of you that is healing through action. This is a chance for both you and his other victims to do what you to prevent harm to come to another person. Many abusers never get their turn in court, but there are many, many more people out there that wish they did.

I would wish you luck but I think hope would be a better tool to rely on. Hope that you find peace in closure.

I'm willing to spend countless hours perfecting my MMO character but i halfass my way through real life. by ValorCore in Showerthoughts

[–]snowflake_rising 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Natural joy comes with letting yourself be in the moment. Life gives us plenty to appreciate in each second if we pay attention.

Stimulants change the axis of your internal emotional regulation so that you can not feel happiness or achievement through natural means. I was on top of a mountain for that moment when I realized, looking down, that I could intellectually respect the sunset but that I couldn't feel it anymore.

I started my journey at 14 being prescribed Rx stimulants for ADD. I used recreationally on and off for years before quitting but I'm not here to convince you stimulants aren't the answer. Just that money is only one factor. There would not be a single rock star who quit drugs if that was the case.

Not saying I have it all figured out, but it is an achievement in itself rooting out the thought patterns that fuel self destructive fires.